WOSSNAME -- NOVEMBER 2009 -- PART 2 OF 5 (continued)
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====Part 2 -- MORE REVIEWS, MORE NEWS, ODDS AND SODS

10) REVIEWS OF UNSEEN ACADEMICALS, CONTINUED
11) WOSSNAME EXCLUSIVE REVIEWS: NATION LIVE AT THE NT
12) ONLY YOU CAN SAVE MANKIND, THE MUSICAL: AT LAST!
13) JUST THE THING FOR HOGSWATCH: UA FOOTBALL CARDS
14) AUDIOFILE: THE SOUNDS OF PRATCHETT
15) THE PRATCHETT COLLECTION COMES TO DUBLIN...TO STAY

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

10) REVIEWS OF UNSEEN ACADEMICALS, CONTINUED

Another long review, by blog reviewer Nymeth:

"What is it about, then? Well, conflicts and immigration,
dehumanizing others and stereotypes and urban violence; the fashion
world, people being judgemental while telling themselves everything
they're doing is for The Greater Good, acceptance, belonging,
success, passion and enthusiasm; being who you are, other people
letting you be who you are, remembering history while not letting it
define you, the fact that there are always several sides to one
story, and...well, you get the point. As the rest of the Discworld
series, it's really about life..."

http://tinyurl.com/yd89jsu


And another from blogger Paperback Reader:

"As always I enjoyed reading Pratchett; I find him very comforting
and he brings me out of any book slump that I occasionally fall
into. I find that he is exceedingly difficult to review; I've
summarised what Unseen Academicals and my response but the joy of
reading Pratchett is inexplicable to describe. You do not need to be
a football fan to appreciate this novel as it is not so much about
the cult of the sport but the societal observations surrounding the
game; it is easy to see the humour in the making of the offside rule
without the need to understand it oneself..."

http://tinyurl.com/yabpepm


And from blogger Jacob at Drying Ink:

"It's a fantastic satire with a message: for fashion, on equality,
whatever Pratchett sets his pen to, it's literary gold. I don't need
to talk about the prose, so instead let it suffice to say: it's
brilliant..."

http://tinyurl.com/yaah66q


A short, sweet review from blogger Tim Niland:

"Culminating with a wildly funny winner take all march between the
wizards and a gang of street toughs and hooligans, the story also
tells a fine tale of understanding and redemption..."

http://jazzandblues.blogspot.com/2009/11/recent-reads.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

11) WOSSNAME EXCLUSIVE REVIEWS: NATION LIVE AT THE NT

11.1 PUPPETS AND PIG-MILKING FUN: A REVIEW OF "NATION" AT THE
NATIONAL

by Llin Thomas

I was lucky enough to get tickets to the pre-premiere of Nation at
the National Theatre, and by the time Wednesday the 11th of November
arrived I was so excited to see one of my favourite books brought to
the stage that I could hardly sleep the night before.

So: the National Theatre's adaptation of Nation was really good, in
a lot of ways. In other ways it was a little lacking, but overall it
was still a really good and enjoyable production.

The actor playing Mau was excellent -- not at all how I'd pictured
the character, and I don't think my mental image is forever changed
afterward, but he really got under Mau's skin and put some pretty
subtle stuff across very well.  The young actor playing Daphne was
more hit and miss, but the bits she hit were very good, and the bits
she missed were not that far off. There were only a few moments
where she really captured the essential Daphne-ness of the
character, but again, having read the book I had a very firm idea of
how the characters should be, and the two in our party who hadn't
read it had no complaints, so probably it works in the context of
the play. She was a bit too shouty; I got the impression perhaps
because the theatre was a little big for her voice and she had
trouble speaking loud enough to fill it ("Mau", on the other hand,
had no trouble in this area).

The rest of the cast were excellent, especially the guy playing the
parrot (fun and clever, and helpful especially near the beginning --
more on that in a minute), and the woman playing Cahle. The woman
playing Daphne's grandmother wasn't on stage long but she made a big
impression, and the kids in the audience especially thought she was
hilarious.

The set and staging were absolutely terrific -- we were struck by
the set as soon as we came in, they used the revolving stage, and it
had the top of a globe on it like a small hill, which was useful for
dividing the stage, and got to play a part in the plot when they
entered the Cave of the Grandfathers. There were three large screens
as well which were used to great effect, especially for the
underwater scenes.

The storm, as I mentioned, was fantastic, they used a combination of
the screens, a large blue sheet for the ocean, lighting effects,
dancing, and a model ship, and it was very effective, especially
since it pretty much opened the show and nobody knew yet quite what
to expect.

There was a lot of use of puppetry, especially for the grandfather
birds (which magically became the grandfathers to talk to Mau --
very clever), and for the pig milking scene, which was hilarious.

The music was wonderful, especially the songs of the Nation. There
were two main ones, Imo Be Praised and the Beer Song, which were
repeated frequently and which I'm not going to stop humming for
quite a while. There was also a fun version of Zadok the Priest for
the coronation scene, and the incidental music was gorgeous too,
with touches here and there of electric guitar which worked in a
very strange way.

Oh, that reminds me, there was a girl of about ten sitting with her
parents directly behind us (at the beginning she said "Mummy, is
Terry Pratchett famous, then?" Bless.) and she kept having to have
everything explained to her every step of the way, which was
irritating, but makes me wonder whether bits of it weren't a bit
confusing for people who hadn't read the book.

Oh yes, it was really funny in places -- I mean, as you would
expect, but there were plenty of LOLs for the kids and grown-ups
alike. Everyone seemed to like the sweary parrot, and there were
giggles when Mau turned up in his trousers. A couple of moments
where the school trip kids in the balcony inevitably sniggered at a
very serious moment at the word "breasts", but you can't have it
all.

I think the trouble is that the story is very big, a little too big
really to fit into a normal-length play. This meant that they had to
skip over a lot or do lots of things very quickly, which made the
pace a bit peculiar in the first act, although it evened out a bit
in the second. Also, because so much of the beginning part of the
book has no dialogue, they had to get a lot of the ideas across in
creative ways, which they did mostly successfully. A lot of it
involved the parrot repeating things that had gone on before the
play started (the opening was very quick, it started with the moment
of Mau burying the axe in the tree and immediately led into the
storm -- very well realised, more on that in a minute...) but they
didn't use this enough for it to become annoying. Also it was
necessary for the first few minutes for both Mau and Daphne to
occasionally hallucinate their relatives in order to have
expositional conversations, but again this worked quite well,
especially the part where Mau saw Locaha in the form of his father
and realised that his people were dead. All in all, the main plot
was pretty much intact, although the significance of a lot of the
smaller bits and pieces was lost.

Overall it was an above-average evening at the theatre, and although
the play didn't quite manage to get across the sheer wealth of ideas
in the book (but then, how could it?), it often captured the spirit
of it, and even where it didn't, it was a very good play.


11.2 NATION @ THE NATIONAL: A REVIEW

by Asti

...or should I say, Nation -- The Musical!

It's difficult for me to give an objective review because, quite
frankly, I hedgehogged up. I bought six primo tickets and then was
too busy to set up invites. The result was that I had six prime
seats all to myself to stew in.

The staging was lovely. The entire production was consummately
professional and it's refreshing to see an actual backing orchestra
rather than people working to a click-track. That said, if I had had
my choice, there would have been less attention paid to singing and
dancing and more attention paid to adhering to the original dialogue
and plot. The big surprise at the end was given away twice (!!!)
before the interval (although I may be wrong as I haven't read
Nation since it came out).

I wondered what someone who hadn't read the book thought so I
accosted some little old biddies at both the interval and afterward.
They too wished there were fewer song & dance routines. They also
wondered where Pratchett's witty dialogue was. Over a bracing cup of
tea, we politely decided that the director must have made decisions
with an eye toward bringing in a younger audience. And yet the
parrot still said "****" and "*!*!*!*!" and such. Mystifying.

Oh, and I bought myself a badge that reads 139th to the Throne.

And I cried at the end. But I'm soppy old thing.


[Editor's note: Both reviewers went to the preview performances.
Nation formally opens on 24th November 2009, and continues in
repertory in the NT Olivier until 28 March 2010.]

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

12) ONLY YOU CAN SAVE MANKIND, THE MUSICAL: AT LAST!

News from the composer's mouth -- Leighton James House writes on
pjsmprints.com:

"Now fully mastered -- and with some hidden treats -- the actual CD
will be available in December from www.ifnotyouthenwho.com

We are also releasing a very special Limited Edition with exclusive
content and a fantastic competition. We've already had some great
feedback regarding the songs and I hope we get the chance to
complete what we started next year with the national tour."

For the original notice, and a photo of the OYCSMtM cover, go to:

http://www.pjsmprints.com/news/index.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

13) JUST THE THING FOR HOGSWATCH: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS FOOTBALL CARDS

Now available from the Cunning Artificer's Discworld Emporium: the
full set of Paul Kidby's Jolly Sailor footy trading cards, as
designed for Unseen Academicals! Comprising twenty different cards,
featuring all the stars of the (very) opposing teams, the set is
priced at £8.00 loose and £12.99 with album included. For those
who prefer the luxury option, the Discworld Emporium also offers a
mounted set backed on board (inc UK postage) for £30.00, mounted
set backed on board (inc EU postage) for £35.00, or mounted set
backed on board (inc Rest of World Postage) for £40.00.

And there's also a lovely selection of 50p Ankh-Morpork Post office
commemorative football stamps, also by Kidby and designed by Bernard
Pearson and Ian Mitchell, featuring Mustrum Ridcully (Capt. UU),
Joseph Hoggett (Capt. AMU) and, as the match referee, The Wizard
Formally Known as the Dean; these are available in Mossy Green,
Royal Blue and Decidedly Grumpy Red, with prices from £0.50 for
individual stamps to £18.00 for a sheet of 36 stamps (12 of each).

http://tinyurl.com/ya66kr6
http://tinyurl.com/ycnzjap
http://tinyurl.com/yadqczs

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

14) AUDIOFILE: THE SOUNDS OF PRATCHETT

This month, Audiofile Magazine features Good Omens, which is being
released as an audiobook in the USA for the first time [Took them
long enough! -- Ed.]. Here be a link to a selection of audio
interviews with the narrators of Good Omens and other Pratchett
books, including Nigel Planer, Martin Jarvis, George Guidall, and --
of course -- Stephen Briggs. Fascinating listening, especially
Martin Jarvis' segment; you can hear how much he's enjoying his
work:

http://www.audiofilemagazine.com/epicks/1109_landingpage.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

15) THE PRATCHETT COLLECTION COMES TO DUBLIN...TO STAY

The dynamic duo of Sir Terry Pratchett and Colin Smythe recently
travelled to Ireland to present the complete back-catalogue of the
author's works to Trinity College, Dublin:

"The catalogue, presented in all 33 of the languages they have been
published in, was presented to the College Library and the School of
Languages, Literatures and Cultural Studies. According to the
College, the gift is intended to underpin research in contemporary
fiction and translational studies.

"Commenting on Mr. Smythe's donation, the Provost, Dr John Hegarty
said that 'Colin's generous gift of this wonderful collection will
inspire future generations of scholars for many years to come.' He
added, 'Trinity has links across the world in all walks of life. Our
links to another world, the Discworld, were expanded last December
through the addition of Sir Terry to our university's alumni. I'm
always delighted to see the success of our graduates
internationally, across all generations.'"

Honorary alumnus Pratchett and Trinity graduate Smythe first met in
1968, worked together from 1971, and have been a literary team par
excellence for over 20 years now. Well done the lads!

http://tinyurl.com/yagwfmc

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-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 2 -- continued on Part 3 of 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2009 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- NOVEMBER 2009 -- PART 3 OF 5 (continued)
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====Part 3 -- MORE ODDS AND SODS, PLAYS NEWS, ETC.

16) UNSEEN SEEN ON SOUTH AFRICAN BEST BOOKS OF 2009 LIST
17) SILENCE THOSE BELLS! IT'S RTFM DARK MORRIS TIME
18) MORE NEW DISCWORLD MINIATURES
19) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
20) NIGHT WATCH: PERFECT FOR HIGH SCHOOL LIT CLASSES
21) ALZHEIMER'S NEWS
22) EVERYTHING BUT THE ELEPHANTS

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16) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS ON SOUTH AFRICAN BEST BOOKS OF 2009 LIST

"His daft account of the Unseen University's foray into the world of
soccer, or foot-the-ball as they occasionally call it, is romantic,
absurdist philosophical, totally Discworld."

http://tinyurl.com/yczqogb

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

17) SILENCE THOSE BELLS! IT'S RTFM DARK MORRIS TIME

"At sunset on Halloween, the Recently Traditional Fictional Morris
troupe [met] at the Somerville Community Growing Center on Vinal
Avenue to dance the AntiMorris, a spoof on the English tradition of
Morris dancing. Morris dancers celebrate spring by dancing at
sunrise in the spring. The idea of having another Morris dance in
the fall came from fantasy writer Terry Pratchett, who suggested
having one without the other created imbalance. 'We did appreciate
the balance. It is common to kind of have an appreciation for the
seasonal nature of things,' said Jeremy Kessler, who started the
RTFM in 2001 and had been involved with AntiMorris dancing since
1999 in Chicago... Although not as long-held as the tradition of
Morris dancing, the AntiMorris is starting to catch on, Kessler
said. This year, nearly 100 people, including dancers, showed up
for the AntiMorris..."

http://tinyurl.com/yddtcqe

[Editor's note: there is of course another, more er um traditional
meaning for the acronym "RTFM". And I suspect that the dancing of
Dark Morris would definitely be something you'd want to read the
manual *very carefully* for before attempting the dance...]

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

18) MORE NEW DISCWORLD MINIATURES

Tabletop Gaming News reports on the latest soon to be released
Discworld miniatures:

http://tinyurl.com/ye7w8dy

Photo of the miniatures -- Lancre Witches, the Bursar, Dibbler:

http://tinyurl.com/y9y7dxd

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

19) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS

MASKERADE IN KIDDERMINSTER

The Nonentities of Kidderminster present their production of
Maskerade for late 2009.

Described as "Phantom of the Opera rebooted for the Tarantino
generation", Maskerade will run from 29th November until 5th
December, with an extra matinee performance on Saturday 5th
December. Following Maskerade, The Nonentities will be helping
patrons to get into the festive mood, with their traditional
Christmas entertainment at The Rose, from December 9 to 12 at
7.30pm. Kerena Taylor, publicity manager for the Rose, says: "The
promise is to bring music, stories, poems, reading and singing. If
that isn't enough to tempt people out on a cold wet winter's
evening, included in the ticket price is a mince pie and a glass of
mulled wine."

When: Sun 29th Nov to Sat 5th Dec 2009
Time:  Matinee curtain up 2.30pm, evening curtain up 7.30pm
Venue: The Main House, Rose Theatre, Kidderminster

Tickets: Monday to Thursday £8.00, Friday & Saturday £8.50
Concessions: Senior citizens, students, and children under 16 years.
Group Bookings: Buy 13 seats or more and get a reduced price.
Available from Monday to Thursday: Reduction of 50p per ticket
Only one discount can be applied to any ticket

Box Office: Till 31st December 2009, opening hours are 10am-4pm
Monday to Saturday. From 4th January 2010, opening hours will be
9am-3pm Monday to Saturday. Telephone bookings may be paid by credit
or debit card

To buy tickets call 01562 743745 or visit rosetheatre.co.uk

http://tinyurl.com/ybhfsem
http://rosetheatre.co.uk/CurrentSeason/Maskerade/about.htm


MASKERADE IN LONDON

The Tower Theatre Company present Stephen Briggs' adaptation of
Maskerade, directed by Chris Peregrine, at two London locations next
month: at the Bridewell Theatre from 8th-12th December, and then at
Theatro Technis from 15th-18th December.

Venue 1: Bridewell Theatre, Bride Lane, off Fleet Street, London EC4
(nearest Tube station is Blackfriars)
When: 08-12 December 2009
Time: Tues-Sat 7.45pm, plus Sat Matinee at 3pm
Tickets: £11
Tower Theatre Box Office: 020 7353 1700

Venue 2: Theatro Technis, 26 Crowndale Rd, Mornington Crescent,
London, NW1 1TT (nearest Tube station is Mornington Crescent)
When: 15-18 December 2009
Time: Tues - Sat 7.45pm, plus Sat Matinee at 3pm
Tickets: £11
Tower Theatre Box Office: 020 7353 1700

http://tinyurl.com/ye5vbpl


CARPE JUGULUM IN GLASTONBURY

A reminder -- Straight From the Heart Productions' presentation of
Carpe Jugulum takes place next month.

Venue: Glastonbury Assembly Rooms, High Street, Glastonbury BA6 9DU.
When: Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday 9th-12th December,2009.
Time: Doors open at 7:30pm for an 8pm start.
Tickets: available from Gothic Image, Glastonbury, or email:
ANICECUPOFTEAANDBISCUITS@...

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

20) NIGHT WATCH: PERFECT FOR HIGH SCHOOL LIT CLASSES

In Mind Meld, SF Signal's weekly online panel, various well-
respected writers and educators were asked "If you were teaching a
high school literature class, which science fiction or fantasy books
first published within the past 10 years would you include on your
syllabus?" David Bradley, longtime editor of the excellent and
league-leading SFX Magazine, included Night Watch as his choice of
choices:

"'A comic fantasy? One part of a series that has almost 40 books in
it? What are you thinking, Bradley?! Go to the headmaster's office
at once!' Sorry sir, but this is a masterful piece of writing, with
a theme of civil unrest for us to discuss, believable central
characters, and an unusual time travel-based framing structure.
There are good reasons why it received the Prometheus Award in 2003,
had a place in the BBC's top 100 'Big Read' survey of the UK's
favourite books, and was nominated for a Locus Award... there is
plenty for a 21st century reading group to talk about: political
assassinations and the effect of the state running a secret police,
the relationship between the regular police and the military, the
ways in which rebellions escalate and how demonstrations can turn to
rioting and bloodshed..."

http://tinyurl.com/ykk89z8

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

21) ALZHEIMER'S NEWS

Here be a round-up of some recent Alzheimer's research news and
fundraising events, taken from the Alzheimer's Research Trust
website. Since Pterry donated a million dollars to the Trust, the
least the rest of us can do is be aware of where some of that money
is going!

CHARITY CYCLETHON

Staff at ESPC property marketing services in Edinburgh, will take
part in a 24-hour endurance challenge on Friday 4 and Saturday 5
December, to raise money for the Alzheimer's Research Trust and
Radio Forth's Kids appeal. The challenge will start and finish when
the cannon is fired at 1pm from Edinburgh Castle. All the action
will take place in the ESPC showroom in George Street, where a team
of seven enthusiastic staff, of varying fitness levels, will run the
equivalent of two marathons and cycle for over 14 hours. Between
them they will cover over 330 kilometres (over 200 miles), without
even leaving the premises.

Neil Harrison, ESPC Marketing Manager, explained the thinking behind
the event: 'As we get so many people passing by our windows, day and
night, a group of staff suggested this would be the ideal
opportunity to attract their attention with a fundraising event. We
chose the charities that are closest to our hearts through our own
personal experiences. We are hoping that anyone out doing their
Christmas shopping or celebrating the festive season will drop by
and give us their support.' Charlotte Garner, Community Fundraiser
for the Alzheimer's Research Trust, said: 'We are very grateful to
the staff at ESPC for the time and effort they are putting into this
inventive challenge. By raising money for vital dementia research
they are helping to bring a cure ever nearer. We wish them every
success and hope that passers-by will give them plenty of
encouragement and keep them motivated.'

NEW APPEAL FOR RESEARCH FUNDING

University College London scientist Dr Selina Wray, together with
Strictly star Lynda Bellingham, is to front a national appeal for
the UK's leading dementia research charity, the Alzheimer's Research
Trust. Dr Wray, who won a fellowship grant from the Alzheimer's
Research Trust in June 2009 was selected by the charity thanks to
her cutting edge work using stem cells to fight Alzheimer's disease.

The new appeal features an in-depth look at Dr Wray's research
alongside a letter written by Lynda Bellingham to nearly 40,000 of
the charity's supporters. The 2008 appeal, which featured
Alzheimer's Research Trust Patron Sir Cliff Richard, raised nearly
£75,000, but the charity is determined to beat that total in 2009.

FATTY ACIDS A CLUE

Bristol scientists supported by the Alzheimer's Research Trust have
found that the amount of fatty acids in the brain varies between
healthy people and those with Alzheimer's. Researchers understand
what is happening in the brain during the disease. Seth Love,
Professor of Neuropathology at the University of Bristol, who led
the work, said: 'Fatty acids are essential to the way our brains
work; they affect the way nerve cells function and help insulate the
electrical signals that transmit information around our brains. When
we compared the brains of people without Alzheimer's to those with
the disease, we found a reduction in two types of fatty acid, and an
increase it two others. It might be that the changes in amounts of
fatty acids contribute to the development of Alzheimer's disease, or
are a consequence. We need to do more research to find out.' Rebecca
Wood, Chief Executive of the Alzheimer's Research Trust, said,
'Dementia research in Bristol is making fantastic progress. It is
vital that we understand the changes in the brain that cause
Alzheimer's so that we can open the door to new treatments and ways
to prevent the disease.'


IMPRESSIVE CORPORATE FUNDING

Professor John Hardy, The Wellcome Trust, and Medical Research
Council have invested £17 million into three new research
programmes focussed on Alzheimer's, Parkinson's and motor neurone
disease. Two of the programmes involve Alzheimer's Research Trust
Scientific Advisers Prof John Hardy FRS of University College London
and Prof Peter St George-Hyslop of Cambridge University.

A video clip explaining the new Alzheimer's research can be found
at:
http://www.youtube.com/wellcometrust#p/u/1/te7dDDIt6VM


FORM OF ALZHEIMER'S IS OFTEN INHERITED

UK scientists, part-funded by the Alzheimer's Research Trust, have
shown that the fourth most common form of dementia is often
inherited. Fronto-temporal dementia (FTD), which affects over 11,000
people in the UK, has a number of variants, and researchers found
that some types are more likely to be inherited than others. FTD is
a progressive disease that damages the front part of the brain,
responsible for controlling behaviour, emotions and language, and
causes dementia in people aged 50-60. Behavioural symptoms may
include acting inappropriately or a complete change of personality.
Less commonly, people with the disease experience language problems
as the first symptom, such as losing the ability to name objects.
The new research shows that the language variants of FTD are less
likely to be inherited than the behavioural variants.


All articles are from the Alzheimer's Research Trust website:
http://tinyurl.com/ycxl28w

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

22) EVERYTHING BUT THE ELEPHANTS

...and the Disc. But still, turtles! Here be a rather cute and
possibly Discworld-themed children's night light that even comes
complete with batteries:

http://tinyurl.com/yc32ls9

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

23) IMAGES OF THE MONTH

A gorgeous 3D "sculpt" by Eoin Cannon, based on Paul Kidby's
drawings of Cohen the Barbarian:

http://paulkidby.net/EoinCohen.jpg
http://paulkidby.net/NewsPage.html


An equally gorgeous photo of Gary Carr as Mau in the National
Theatre's London production of Nation:

http://www.whatsonstage.com/images/nation_mau1.jpg

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

24) HEX IS ALIVE AND WELL IN ROUNDWORLD

Forget antivirus, this is ant-antivirus!

"Digital ants could soon be crawling through your computer's hard
drive, but don't worry, they are there to help... The digital ants
report any suspicious activity to a digital sentinel, a program
designed to watch over a set of computers in a network. The sentinel
sorts through all the information the ants gather, and if its
suspicious, passes the information on to a digital sergeant. The
sergeant then alerts the human supervisor, who can the deal with the
problem..."

http://news.discovery.com/tech/digital-ants-computer-worms.html

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 3 -- continued on Part 4 of 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2009 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- NOVEMBER 2009 -- PART 4 OF 5 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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====Part 4 -- ...AND MORE, AND HOROSCOPE

25) CONVENTION NEWS
26) PRATCHETT READING CHALLENGE
27) ACTION REPLAY: RIM TO HUB'S DISCWORLD PLAYLIST
28) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

25) CONVENTION NEWS

25.1 DWCON 2010 UPDATES

Hi all,

Your friendly neighbourhood hotel team here! It seems that everyone
is really looking forward to the Convention, and most of you are
nice and organised, because we have had a record number of hotel
bookings compared to this point before previous conventions.

We have now booked out just over 80% of the rooms available at the
Birmingham Hilton Metropole, and certain room types (for example
family rooms) are nearly booked up. So if you are wanting to stay at
the convention hotel and haven't already booked your room, now is the
time to do so! Once all the rooms are full, they're full...

Bear in mind that you do not have to pay any money in advance, and
that you can cancel or change your booking up to 48 hours before you
are due to check in. You will not pay any money until you check out
(credit card details are taken to secure the room only).

Don't forget that by booking a room in the convention hotel you can
make sure you're right there for all the action (it's not unusual for
bar parties to be in full swing in the wee small hours of the
morning), and the booking also includes the delicious Hilton buffet
breakfast. That should be a good incentive to get out of bed after a
late night having fun!

A reminder of the convention special rates:
Single room £60 per person per night (£60 per room per night)
Double/twin room £50 per person per night (£100 per room per night)
Children under 16 Free accommodation if sharing with one or two
adults (£60 or £100 per room per night)
Half price accommodation if in their own room (£30 or £50 per
room per night)

If you have any questions, you can reach the hotel team at the
following address: hotel@...

Also, make sure you check out our new feature on the convention
website, a Discworld Guide to Birmingham!

With regards,
The Hotel Team


Price Rise Reminder

I just wanted to remind you all that the next price increment for
membership of the convention kicks in on Sunday November 1st. As per
https://www.dwcon.org/static/membership Full Membership rises from
£50 to £55 and Concessionary Membership moves from £33 - £36.
Supporting stays static at £20, but obviously the price to later
convert to a full membership will increase!

It should also be noted that we're now up at around 625 members (the
computer glitch in assigning numbers is being filled in quite
rapidly), so while there's still a ways to go to our 800 cap, the
gap is getting smaller! We're really looking forward to August 2010
and along with a few more guests we hope to announce the first draft
of our Programme well before the end of the year.

As always, if you have any queries, please let us know!
Membership -- membership@...
Hotel -- hotel@...
General Queries -- info@...

Regards,

Brian,
Chairman, Discworld Convention 2010


25.2 IDWCON REPORTS

Author and IDWcon guest Peter Morwood had a very good time indeed:

"D and I had a great time -- including one especial benefit, being
able to sit and speak to Terry for the first time in too long. We
didn't have any opportunity to chat with him at all during the Tempe
convention, so really enjoyed being able to just talk... Much beer
was consumed over the weekend (of course) and I'm not the only one
to think that Sir T. Pratchett, all in black with a white beard,
looked very well matched by the pint of Guinness in his hand. He
also seemed very at ease, so much so that he decided to extend his
stay at the hotel..."

http://petermorwood.livejournal.com/26414.html


Blogger booksareadrug has posted a nice photo of Pterry talking to
fans in a casual setting at IDWcon:

http://booksareadrug.livejournal.com/27399.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

26) PRATCHETT READING CHALLENGE

Australian blogger Margaret "Marg" Bates has a challenge for
Pratchett fans:

"As far back as March 2007 I blogged about the possibility of
reading the Discworld series in its entirety, but it never happened.
You know that means just one thing! Time for a Terry Pratchett
reading challenge! The challenge will start from 1 December 2009 and
run through to 30 November 2010. There are several different levels
of participation for you to choose from:

1-3 books -- Cashier at Ankh-Morpork Mint
4-5 books -- Guard of the City Watch
6-8 books -- Academic at the Unseen University
9-10 books -- Member of Granny Weatherwax's Coven
10-12 books -- Death's Apprentice

"You can either be reading the books for the first time, rereading,
or even watching the TV adaptations if you like! As long as everyone
has fun I will be happy! Please also do not feel limited to only
reading the Discworld books as any books by Terry Pratchett will
count for this challenge. Each month, I will put a Mr Linky up so
that you can link your reviews or Pratchett posts if you want to do
more general posts say on individual characters, places, events etc.
To sign up just leave a comment on this post with a link to your
intro post if you do one. I look forward to seeing what people post
about over the next 12 months."

http://tinyurl.com/y954auh

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

27) ACTION REPLAY: RIM TO HUB'S DISCWORLD PLAYLIST

Some months ago, WOSSNAME featured a request from the lovely and
long-standing From Rim to Hub website, calling to Discworld fans to
recommend music for any or all Discworld characters and whatnot.
Time to have another look:

"This is where you'll find music that relates to (hopefully,
eventually) most aspects of the Discworld universe created by the
seriously awesome and ridiculously brilliant Terry Pratchett. This
playlist is created by fans for fans, so if you've got a song you'd
like to share, please e-mail fromrimtohub@... with the song
and possible tags. Browse the Song Categories, listen to the Latest
Additions, or just grab Life by the trousers (of Time) and listen to
whatever comes, but most importantly, have fun! Suggestions welcome!
Email fromrimtohub {at} gmail {dot} com."

http://www.fromrimtohub.com/playlist/

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

28) DEFINITELY NOT THE NEW DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

[Editor's note: due to circumstances beyond our control, Fernando
Magnifico is unable to perform his duties as astrologer for WOSSNAME
this month. We are however, very happy to reprint an interview with
Fernando by Miss Sacharissa Cripslock of the Ankh-Morpork Times.]


Fernando: Buongiorno, signorina Sacharissa! You must please be
forgiving Fernando for his rudeness in not getting up to greet you,
but as you can see Fernando is in the stocks.

Sacharissa: That must be very uncomfortable, Mr Magnifico.

F: Please, you must call me Fernando! Yes, Fernando can tell you
that this is not as pleasant as the stocks they have in those
exciting private clubs in The Mews. Trust me on this, for Fernando
knows it is so! It is the molto uncomfortable, but do not be
afeared, for Fernando is willing to suffer for the sake of providing
the accurate horoscopes for his readers.

S: I'm sure your readers are wondering why you are in the stocks.
How is this related to you being an astrologer?

F: My dear friends, as you may remember, Fernando's membership of
the Guild of Prognosticators, Soothsayers, Fortunetellers,
Oneiromancers, Haruspices and Cunning-Men (divers wizards, witches,
priests, priestess and Mrs Cake exempted) had expired, probably
because of the dastardly actions of that mangiatore del formaggio
Carlos, please excuse Fernando's Quirmian. But Fernando is not one
to let his dear readers down, and so last month he bravely girded
his magnificent loins for the battle with the Guild and wrote the
horoscopes, regardless of all danger to himself. Consequently, the
Guild has made the complaint to the Patrician, who has sentenced
Fernando to spend a week in the stocks for the unlicensed
prognosticating.

S: With two days still to go, how are you coping with the
experience?

F: It is very hard, like Fernando's muscles, but Fernando is
sustained by one thing: his many wonderful friends who have
supported him during this terrible period, and the love of his
readers.

S: That is two things, Mr Magnifico.

F: Yes, you are right, Fernando can see why you are the Ankh-Morpork
Times' grandissima investigative reporter! Fernando is sustained by
the two things: his wonderful friends and the love of his readers.
And his dedication to his art. No, perdone me, that is three things.
Three things: friendship, love, and dedication. And knowing that
Rail Youventis beat the Quirmians three goals to nil last week. Four
things! Friendship, love, dedication, Youventis, and the knowledge
that the Guild has finally found Fernando's membership renewal, so
when this is over, Fernando can practice the casting of the
horoscopes again.

In any case, Fernando has been in worse places, like the two weeks
he spent as the captive of pirates in the Bay of Mante.

S: You were held prisoner by pirates?

F: Perhaps not so much a prisoner exactly, but Fernando's heart was
held captive by the terrible and beautiful Pirate Queen of Mante,
the dreaded Captain Roberta. It was a terrible time for Fernando, he
was exhausted every night by the ordeals Roberta and her all-lady
pirate crew put him through, and of course at the end of it all, his
heart was broken when Captain Roberta tired of him and put him
ashore with nothing but a week's worth of food, one hundred gold
pieces, a donkey, and a letter of recommendation to Princess
Katherina of Orohai.

S: If we can return to the stocks, many of our readers are
fascinated by the range of punishments available to Lord Vetinari.
Hardly a week goes by without The Times getting a letter or two from
somebody complaining that his Lordship is too soft on criminals and
that they could devise a much better punishment themselves. For some
reason they often involve red-hot spikes, elephants, or sometimes
both at the same time. What are your thoughts on the matter?

F: Fernando is not the how do you say career criminal, and it is
only due to the unfortunate mistake that he is here! But Fernando
has travelled much, and seen the many cities and towns, and when you
are as much loved as Fernando, occasionally you find the husband or
father who is not so understanding of the matters of the heart. So
you can trust Fernando on this when he says that these are the best
stocks in the world, second only to the stocks of Brindisi. And that
is only because the Brindisian craftsmans take the time to carve the
educational pictures in the stocks for the benefit of the prisoner.
As a small boy, Fernando learned much about anatomy from the
carvings on the Brindisi stocks. You should have seen the faces of
the prisoners when they noticed the carvings!

S: I'm sure Disgusted of Ankh will be pleased to read your kind
words about Morporkian stocks. And the elephants?

F: Fernando loves all animals, especially the dogs, but perhaps not
the same way that some of the stray dogs have come to love
Fernando's leg. If Fernando didn't know better, he would be sure
that one of the dogs was (how do you say it?) egging the others on.
A mangy terrier with a particularly estupido look in its eye.

S: While you are unavailable, what do you suggest your readers
should do if they need a horoscope cast?

F: Of course Fernando would normally recommend that they should
contact the most beautiful and talented Lady Asterisk for their
astrological needs, but Fernando is molto saddened to say that Lady
Asterisk has been bitten by a jelly and cannot write the horoscopes.
For those who cannot wait for Fernando to be released, there are the
many other astrologers in the Guild. Fernando knows that there are
the many people -- not Fernando you understand, but the other people
-- who say that these astrologers (not Fernando, the other
astrologers) could not find their own bottom with the help of a
orrery, let alone the right constellation. Fernando knows that this
is not true, if it was a simple enough orrery. And cara Sacharissa,
let Fernando reassure your readers that these other astrologers
hardly ever confuse the Celestial Parsnip with Wezen the Two-Headed
Kangaroo or the Small Boring Group of Faint Stars. If your needs are
few and your expectations are low, Fernando is sure that they will
be more than adequate.

S: Thank you Fernando, and I'm sure I speak for all your readers
when I say I hope your last few days in the stocks go by quickly.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 4 -- continued on Part 5 of 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2009 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- NOVEMBER 2009 -- PART 5 OF 5 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 5 -- LATE BREAKING NEWS, CLOSE

29) LATE BREAKING NEWS
30) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

29) LATE BREAKING NEWS

29.1 IF NOT YOU, THEN...

The first six songs from Only You Can Save Mankind: the Musical are
now available to purchase as downloads. Official online release of
the entire musical is 23rd November 2009; CD release will be on 2nd
December 2009.

To buy from iTunes:
http://tinyurl.com/ya2xof8

To buy from DittoMusic:
http://www.dittomusic.dloadshop.com/shop.asp?artistid=591
or http://tinyurl.com/yb6wj3k

Remember, the producers are donating 10% of the profits from sales
to the Alzheimer's Research Trust.

http://www.ifnotyouthenwho.com/


29.2 MORE REVIEWS OF UNSEEN ACADEMICALS...

Classics doctoral student and Discworld fan Juliette Harrisson
reviews Unseen Academicals with an eye to Roundworld-based classical
references. This is an interesting but very spoilery piece, so I
won't mention *which* references...

"I liked this book a lot - not up there with the absolute best of
Discworld, but definitely one of the good 'uns. I especially loved
how 'real' many of the characters felt - as if you expect to see
them walking down the street before the next football match..."

http://tinyurl.com/yehqgxz


Sci-fi London reviews Unseen Academicals:

"Despite the ever-presents in the cast, Lord Vetinari and Arch
Chancellor Ridcully among them, Pratchett never forgets that they
need to grow and learn with each book and because he treats the new
characters as well as the old stagers they are all fully rounded and
realised and you care about them from the first page.  Another
amazing thing for me was how he absolutely gets what football is
about - for the fans and the players - and I might just eat one of
his hats if he turns out to be a lifelong fan 'cos he just doesn't
strike me as one. But then that's the beauty of his books, they fool
you again and again. Just when you think you know what's coming
he'll surprise you with something out-of left-field and it's those
delightful moments that keep the fans coming..."

http://tinyurl.com/yfdn84s


29.3 GOOD OMENS: STILL A CONTENDER

Terry Gilliam, interviewed on Fearnet, says the mooted film of Good
Omens could still happen:

"It's still sitting out there. It needs a lot of money though..."

http://tinyurl.com/yk4nc7p


29.4 ...AND THE PARROT STOLE THE SHOW

A blog review by Culture Witch of the Nation at the NT preview
performance:

"Melly Still and Mark Friend have done a great job of making the NT
stage into a tsunami wrecked tropical island that's believable,
and Mark Ravenhill has adapted Terry Pratchett's Nation in an
imaginative way... The novel has been changed a little, but I
surprised myself by being surprised at how touching the end is.
While providing entertainment and fun, Nation also gives us
something to think about..."

http://tinyurl.com/ybnq2ja


29.5 DRUMMERS DOWN UNDER SYDNEY MEET-UP

There's now a Broken Drummers group in Fourecks! Drummers Down Under
are based in Sydney and will be meeting on the first Monday of every
month for chatter, cheer and possibly scumble, or at least
EcksEcksEcksEcksian beer, at Maloneys (situated at the corner of
Pitt and Goulburn, for you Jograffy-canny Sinneysiders). The next
meet-up will be at seven p.m. on Monday 7th December, and Lauren,
who is in charge of drumming up the Drummers, assures me that "there
will probably be some Hogswatchery organised" for the evening.

If you want to know more about the Drummers Down Under, or have
questions about, say, how the Hogfather manages to fit down the
average Fourecksian split-system air conditioner on Hogswatchnight
or where the best pubs in Didjabringabeeralong are, email Lauren:
simlauren (at) hotmail (dot) com.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

30) AND IT'S GOODNIGHT FROM...

...a very tired Editor. Huge thanks as always to the Newshound Gang
and the inimitable Colin Smythe. See you next month for a (we hope)
bumper Hogswatch issue! And then it's January holiday time for me...

-- Annie Mac

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2009 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
24th DECEMBER 2009
*********************************************************************

SPECIAL EDITION DECEMBER 2009: A LETTER AT HOLIDAY SEASON

*********************************************************************

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo


LETTER FROM YOUR EDITOR: THIS TIME, IT'S PERSONAL

Happy Hogswatch/Christmas/Hanukkah/Yuletide/holiday-of-choice to you
all!

This month's issue of WOSSNAME will be somewhat delayed, partly
owing to the holiday season and partly owing to your Editor being a
grumpus. But fear not, it shall arrive...eventually...

First off, some cheering news: Joe Schaumburger ate'nt dead! I
received a Christmas card and letter from him yesterday. Sadly, his
health has continued to decline, and in addition to yet more heart
attacks he had a bout of pneumonia that nearly finished him, but he
continues to defy doctors' predictions by stubbornly refusing to
keep his appointment with Bill Door just yet. Joe has been keeping
up with WOSSNAME, and has asked me to give his holiday greetings and
best wishes to all you readers out there. Hang in there, Joe!

In a less cheery vein...it is said, possibly by sages in the
Trollbone Mountains, that some are born to publish WOSSNAME and some
have WOSSNAME thrust upon them. As you know, O readers, I fall into
that latter category. In May of 2007, founder Joe Schaumburger
became too ill to carry on as chief of WOSSNAME and handed the baton
to me; I'd already been doing most of the donkey-work for quite some
time before that, so I knew at least some of the ropes, but at the
time neither Joe nor I had much hope for the continued existence of
this monthly newsletter since I, too, have chronic health issues.
Somehow, with the help of the Newshound Gang -- and for more than a
year now, Fernando the monthly horoscope writer -- I've managed to
carry on, getting an issue out every month just as Joe did. I said
I'd step aside as soon as a proper editor came forth, but none ever
did, and over the past two and one-half years I think I've turned
out to be a reasonably proper editor myself.

But.

In private life I'm known as someone who never minces words when
giving an opinion, good *or* bad, and who doesn't suffer fools
gladly -- but as the editor of WOSSNAME I feel it incumbent upon me
to look (as impartially as possible) for the good (if any) in
poorly-presented or agenda-ridden reviews of Terry Pratchett's
work, and refrain from suggesting that the Assassins' Guild should
be contacted in regard to certain arts critics... and this month,
I've found it well-nigh impossible to do so. Oh, I've no cavil with
legitimate criticisms, but when a reviewer is patently sniffing
balloon juice or obviously wrong-headed, it's very hard for me to
hold my temper -- yet slinging brickbats is not what I think
WOSSNAME is meant to be about.

Last month we featured several intelligent punter reviews of the
first performances of Mark Ravenhill's adaptation of Nation at the
National Theatre, London. Both reviews contained some criticisms of
the play, but were approving overall, and both reviews were written
by people whom I know personally and whose judgement I respect. But
then came an avalanche of press reviews, almost all of them so
scathing -- and so off-message -- that I'd been avoiding doing my
editorial duty of by quoting extracts and providing links, because I
felt the volleys of negativity were too upsetting.

And guess what? So did the author. So he went to see Nation at the
National, and got his own review published.

I entreat you to read Sir Pterry's entire review (see below), and
bear it in mind as you read the other press reviews in the December
WOSSNAME when it arrives. Apparently he saw the same play our
November reviewers did -- and most of the press reviewers didn't,
from the look of it.

And now I'm off to partake of Hogswatch cheer. May you enjoy your
holidays, and here's to a brand new year. And if the December issue
of WOSSNAME arrives just after the turn of the calendar, we'll see
you in the Year of the Happy Goose!

-- Annie Mac


*  *  *     *  *  *     *  *  *     *  *  *     *  *  *


THE AUTHOR AS THEATRE CRITIC: "LOOK WHAT THEY'VE DONE TO MY BOOK"

And so it came to pass that Sir Pterry finally saw the National
Theatre's production of Nation, and wrote about it in The Telegraph.

Here are some extracts from his review:

"Last Wednesday, I went to the National Theatre to see the play
Nation, based on my book, which by a happy coincidence was also
called Nation. It is, I think, the best book that I have ever
written or will write; it is certainly the one that took most
effort... when the play opened to the press two weeks ago, it got
rather more kicks than plaudits. There was praise for the staging,
but the play on the whole got such epithets as 'racist',
'politically correct' and 'fascist', although to be fair, I think
that whoever said that was probably confused.

"All this for the play of a book that was universally well-received
last year and this year won the Printz Medal, given by the American
Librarians Association and the highest US award for young adult
literature that it is possible for a British author to win. I know
some of those librarians. They are tough cookies. Racism, fascism
and overt PC wouldn't stand a chance...

"I was so depressed that fellow authors rallied around as a kind of
small support group to say, 'Don't take any notice of the critics'
and to remind me that the author doesn't get blamed.

"So, last week, I walked into the theatre like Wyatt Earp on a
deceptively quiet street in Tombstone, my finger already on the
trigger..."


To read the entire review and see what Pterry thought, go to:

http://tinyurl.com/ybkt5e2

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2009 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
DECEMBER 2009 (Volume 12, Issue 12)
*********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a FREE publication for members of the worldwide
Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North
American Discworld Society and other continental groups. Are you a
member? Yes, if you sent in your name, country and e-mail address.
Are there any dues? No! As a member of the Klatchian Foreign Legion,
you'd only forget them...
*********************************************************************
Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
Editor Emeritus (retd): Joseph Schaumburger
News Editor: Fiona (not Bruce) Bruce
Newshounds: Vera, Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow
Staff Writers: Asti Osborn, Paul Blake, Steven D'Aprano
Convention Reporters: Mithtrethth Hania Ogg et al
Staff Technomancer: Jason Parlevliet
Book Reviews: Drusilla D'Afanguin
Puzzle Editor: Tiff
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
DW Horoscope: Lady Anaemia Asterisk, Fernando Magnifico
Emergency Staff: Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare
time)
Copyright 2009 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

------------------------------------------------------------------------

INDEX:

====Part 1 -- ALL THE NEWS THAT FITS

01) QUOTE OF THE MONTH
02) LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
03) PTERRY ON SMALL GODS...AND ALL GODS
04) THE LIFE OF PRATCHETT: A FRESH LOOK
05) WRITERS' GUILD OF GREAT BRITAIN HONOURS PRATCHETT
06) PTERRY NAMED BEST-SELLING "HALF AUTHOR" OF THE DECADE
07) THE COLOUR OF MAGIC: A MAGICAL UK RENTALS SUCCESS
08) NATION AT THE NATIONAL: NEWS AND UPDATES
09) NATION AT THE NATIONAL: REVIEWS

====Part 2 -- MORE REVIEWS, NEWS, ODDS AND SODS

10) REVIEWS OF NATION AT THE NT, CONTINUED
11) THE GUARDIAN BOOK CLUB TAKES ON UNSEEN ACADEMICALS
12) REVIEWS OF UNSEEN ACADEMICALS
13) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
14) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS: METAQUOTED
15) OUR FAVOURITE AUTHOR -- IN LEGO?!
16) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
17) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS WANTS YOU!
18) AUDIOBOOKS: THEY ATE'NT DEAD
19) GETCHYER 2010 DISCWORLD CALENDAR HEEEERE!
20) A SHIRT TO SCORE IN
21) JACQUELINE SIMPSON PROFILE
22) THE POWER OF GLOING

====Part 3 -- HOROSCOPE AND CLOSE

23) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE
24) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

01) QUOTE OF THE MONTH

"In my religion, the building of a telescope is the building of a
cathedral."

-- Pterry speaking at the Guardian Book Club Q&A, December 2009

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

02) LETTER FROM THE EDITOR

Wotcha! This final issue of 2009 is just squeaking in under the
wire, as it's nearly dawn on New Year's Eve down here in Fourecks.

It's been yet another momentous year for all things Pterry, filled
with achievements, kudos, awards, controversy, and the premiere of
the first-ever Pratchett play on one of the world's most prestigious
stages. For those who worried that our favourite author's illness
might have affected the quality of his work, Unseen Academicals has
proved beyond a doubt that there's nothing to worry about, and that
his fertile imagination and wizardly wordsmithing skills are still
at their peak.

It's been a long year in the WOSSNAME forge. As mentioned in last
week's extra, I've been editing and publishing this newsletter for
coming on three years now, and I think it might be time for a brief
holiday. We're definitely not closing our doors, but if anyone out
there of a journalistic bent fancies taking a turn as editor for the
January 2010 issue, now would be the time to speak up...

I'd like to take this opportunity to once again thank Colin Smythe
and the Newshound Gang for their invaluable contributions of news
and views.

Twenty-six years ago, The Colour of Magic burst forth on an
unsuspecting world, and left our world far richer for it. Here's to
another twenty-six years of Pterry and Discworld!

And now, on with the show...

-- Annie Mac, Editor

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

03) PTERRY ON SMALL GODS...AND ALL GODS

Here be a video of Pterry addressing a Q&A session of the Guardian
Book Club, in which he answers a direct question about his belief
(or not) in gods. Sparkling, charming, imbued with a lust for life
and a love for all the universe, so obviously still a man at the
height of his intellectual powers, he shapes his answer with
measured thought, delicious wit, and a distinct touch of red wine:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8qqnTmBTwOo&feature=player_embedded

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

04) THE LIFE OF PRATCHETT: A FRESH LOOK

Here be an excellent, comprehensive and up-to-the-minute biography
of the Master, by his longtime friend and colleague Colin Smythe aka
The Man Who Believed (in Pterry). Well worth a read! You may learn
something new -- like the fact that Sir Pt is writing his *own*
biography now...

http://www.pjsmprints.com/biography/terrypratchett.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

05) WRITERS' GUILD OF GREAT BRITAIN HONOURS PRATCHETT

The Writers' Guild of Great Britain have bestowed 13 awards in 2009
for outstanding script writing in the UK:

"These prestigious annual awards recognise talented UK scriptwriters
across a range of disciplines including TV, theatre, film, radio and
video games... The Writers' Guild Awards are sponsored by the
Authors' Licensing and Collecting Society (ALCS), BBC Writersroom,
BBC Talent Rights Group and HW Fisher & Company, the accountants
with many clients in the entertainment and media world... Sir Terry
Pratchett -- knighted this year for his services to literature -- is
honoured for his outstanding contribution as a children's writer,
although his Discworld series of comedy fantasy novels has hooked
readers of all ages..."

http://tinyurl.com/yatm9r8

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

06) PTERRY NAMED BEST-SELLING "HALF AUTHOR" OF THE DECADE

...which is to say, Pratchett counts as a half because he writes
both children's and adult novels, apparently:

"Hargreaves and Rowling are joined by two and a half other
children's authors in the top 10 -- former children's laureate
Jacqueline Wilson of Tracey Beaker fame at number four, the
perennial Enid Blyton at number 10 and Terry Pratchett, author of
both children's and adult fiction at number five..."

http://tinyurl.com/yey53e4

[Editor's note: at 10,455,397 (£77.2m), that's a very big half! And
if you're wondering who this mysterious Hargreaves is, don't go
racing to your nearest bookseller to check out his fiction style --
see, he publishes study guides, not novels.]


Also, Amazon.co.uk lists Pterry as the fourth best-selling author of
the decade, behind JK Rowling but comfortably ahead of Dan Brown:

http://tinyurl.com/y97dwlv

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

07) THE COLOUR OF MAGIC: A MAGICAL UK RENTALS SUCCESS

"But the runaway success of the story of BBC series Gavin and
Stacey's cross-border romance was not enough to beat the appeal of
Terry Pratchett adaptation The Colour of Magic. The fantasy epic
topped the chart for the most rented TV series..."

http://tinyurl.com/yh25ohw

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

08) NATION AT THE NATIONAL: NEWS AND UPDATES

8.1 EXTENDED RUN

Originally scheduled to end its run in late January 2010, Nation has
now been extended through 28th March. For dates, availability go to:

http://tinyurl.com/yb2s7cd


8.2 SPECIAL OFFERS

a. Best available seats for £30

Call 020 7452 3000 and quote 'Promotion 2406' or visit
http://www.nationaltheatre.org.uk and enter promotion code 2406 to
activate your discount. The offer is valid for the following
performances: January 1, 4, 5, 15, 18 (6pm), 19, 20 (subject to
availability)

b. Get over 25% off top two price tickets for Nation at the National
Theatre.

Call 020 7452 3000 and quote promotion 2385 or book online at
http://www.nationaltheatre.org.uk and enter promotion code 2385. Top
price will be £30 and 2nd price will be £25 (usual prices £42.50
and £35). This offer is valid on performances from 1 - 28 January
2010. (Excludes all matinees and Saturday evenings. Subject to
availability.)


8.3 ENTRY PASS FOR YOUNG THEATREGOERS: SEE NATION FOR FREE!

The National Theatre is offering free theatre tickets to 15-25 year
olds as part of A Night Less Ordinary, a new Arts Council England
scheme intended "to encourage the next generation of audience
members to get involved in the National Theatre's programme, and to
take advantage of all the extra resources that the NT has to offer"
by providing 618,000 free theatre tickets in over 200 venues across
England to people under 26.

In order to access the free tickets, 15-25 yr olds must register as
Entry Pass members. Entry Pass is free to join, and once registered,
the first ticket to the NT is FREE (for performances Mon-Thu); each
subsequent ticket will cost just £5. Join now to claim your FREE
ticket and be eligible for £5 tickets for future performances.

"Once you have submitted your application form and received your
Membership Card, you should call the Box Office on 020 7452 3000 to
claim your free ticket. All subsequent £5 tickets can be purchased
online using the login details sent with your Membership Card. All
existing Entry Pass members can also claim one free ticket, and can
do so by calling the Box Office from Monday 23 February."

To download the Entry Pass Membership Application Form, go to:
http://www.nationaltheatre.org.uk/download.php?id=6621

If you have already registered and have received your membership
card, you currently book for the all the shows listed below. Click
on the shows below for more details and for how to book. [The shows
are varied, and include Nation -- Ed.]

For an interactive tour of the National Theatre, go to:
www.nationaltheatre.org.uk/discover

The National Theatre is also interested in encouraging young theatre
reviewers. If you fancy yourself as a thesp-crit of the future,
email entrypass@... "for the chance join
professional critics and have your reviews posted online".

http://www.nationaltheatre.org.uk/entrypass

http://www.nationaltheatre.org.uk/entrypass#pginfo


8.4 THE SCOTTISH PLAY...WRIGHTS

Thirteen-year-old Aberdeen twins Hugo and Ollie Inglis have been
shortlisted for the Terry Pratchett Young Film-makers Competition,
in which aspiring young playwrights were challenged to make a three-
minute film adaptation of a passage from Nation. The brothers are
the only Scots out of ten shortlisted entries, and one of five
shortlisted entries in the 10-14 age-group.

"The pair, of Stanley Street, Aberdeen, will find out next week if
they have won the competition. If successful, their film will be
shown at cinemas around the country as a taster to the stage
adaptation of Nation, which is being shown at London's National
Theatre."

"Ollie said 'We can't believe that we might actually see our film in
the cinema. We have definitely won a trip to London to see Nation in
the National Theatre so we're looking forward to that as we are big
Terry Pratchett fans, but to see our film in the cinema would be
brilliant.'"

http://tinyurl.com/ydh7ndw
http://tinyurl.com/yetpcoy


8.5 PHOTOS OF NATION ON STAGE

At Playbill.com, a gallery of twelve shots of Nation in action:

http://www.playbill.com/multimedia/gallery/894


8.6 NATION AROUND THE WORLD: A REMINDER

Tickets for the NT Live cinema screenings of Nation are on sale now.
For a list of cinemas, go to:

http://tinyurl.com/y986aqe

[We're going to see it in February! -- Ed.]

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

09) REVIEWS OF NATION AT THE NATIONAL

In The Telegraph:

"Mark Ravenhill's adaptation of the novel, and Melly Still's
production which faces formidable challenges in bringing storms,
giant waves, shipwrecks, and wildlife ranging from a foul-mouthed
parrot to an enormous pig to the stage, isn't in quite the same
league as War Horse... But there are some stunning underwater
sequences and more importantly a script by the usually abrasive
Ravenhill that captures Pratchett's noble mixture of humour and
human sympathy..."

http://tinyurl.com/yzdml98


In What's On Stage (London):

"The ingredients in Melly Still's fitfully spectacular production
are promising enough, with the exploratory British boat washed up on
a devastated island of dead ancestors and flying dolphins: a flurry
of leaves rise to the top of the Olivier and are instantly
transformed into film imagery...  There are brisk contributions from
Michael Mears as a spindle-shanked baddie, Gaye Brown as an
imperious grandmother form the old country and Ewart James Walters
as the tribal leader. But there's no real momentum in the show,
which veers towards self-parody..."

http://tinyurl.com/ygj23ro


In The Times:

"Judging by the cheers that greeted the curtain, the show can more
safely be recommended than (say) the average Treasure Island or
Aladdin; but the narrative can be confusing, the political
correctness irksome, and much else as wishful and sentimental as,
well, Treasure Island or Aladdin. Mark you, the director-designer
Melly Still's production is often as visually captivating as her
Coram Boy..."

http://tinyurl.com/ylzdk3g


In The Guardian:

"It is all staged with a hectic panache. Still and her co-designer,
Mark Friend, have created a stage dominated by three translucent
screens through which we glimpse floating corpses, swimming
dolphins, predatory man-eaters... Gary Carr and Emily Taaffe as Mau
and Daphne disport themselves with great dignity and there is a nice
study of a talking, walking parrot from Jason Thorpe..."

http://tinyurl.com/ylj35rg

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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End of Part 1, continued on Part 2 of 3.
If you did not get all three parts, write: interact@...
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Copyright (c) 2009 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- DECEMBER 2009 -- PART 2 OF 3 (continued)
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====Part 2 -- MORE REVIEWS, NEWS, ODDS AND SODS

10) REVIEWS OF NATION AT THE NT, CONTINUED
11) GUARDIAN BOOK CLUB TAKES ON UNSEEN ACADEMICALS
12) REVIEWS OF UNSEEN ACADEMICALS
13) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
14) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS: METAQUOTED
15) OUR FAVOURITE AUTHOR -- IN LEGO?!
16) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
17) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS WANTS YOU!
18) AUDIOBOOKS: THEY ATE'NT DEAD
19) GETCHYER 2010 DISCWORLD CALENDAR HEEEERE!
20) A SHIRT TO SCORE IN
21) JACQUELINE SIMPSON PROFILE
22) THE POWER OF GLOING

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

10) REVIEWS OF NATION AT THE NT, CONTINUED

In The Independent:

"Melly Still's production occasionally creates ravishing visual
effects with its three large picture-framed aquaria, which swarm
with scene-setting video footage or purl with blood during moments
of violence. But morally and emotionally, the drama is
undernourished. The tsunami seems to cure Mau tout court of any
fundamental belief in the patriarchal gods of his tribe and his rite
of passage into the assumption of responsibility as adult head of
his nation is insufficiently pitted with deep dilemmas..."

http://tinyurl.com/ycpds49


In the Jewish Chronicle:

"There is a bit of Peter Pan here, a bit of Alice there, and, as
always with Melly Still's productions, the story is told with awe-
inspiring theatricality. The (projected) waves are truly towering
and people are tossed in shark-infested waters like dolls... this is
a must-see for families."

http://tinyurl.com/yztqx7b


In the Wall Street Journal:

"Director/designer Melly Still fills the stage with puppet vultures,
babies and malign spirits, adorns cannibals and tribesmen with
conventional diets alike in witch-doctor masks, and has silly gore
and yucky spitting (pig's milk -- ugh) to make the younger audience
members giggle. Mr. Ravenhill has lots of good jokes -- though the
irreverent parrot gets all the best punch lines..."

http://tinyurl.com/ylmxrc9


In the Daily Mail:

"Nation, based on a novel by Sir Terry Pratchett, has several coups
de theatre. Colour, noise and spectacle it has a-plenty. What it
lacks is a gripping, easily understood narrative to give audiences a
festive treat..."

http://tinyurl.com/yzlt7gx


In the Financial Times:

"Mark Ravenhill's skilful adaptation simplifies and fillets
Pratchett's material but is not afraid to add detail and deepen...
Artistic director Nicholas Hytner has faced accusations of
programming Christmas-season shows at the NT which are not merely
un-Christian but anti-Christian: Coram Boy, War Horse and His Dark
Materials. But what these works and Nation have in common is an
affirmation of the values at the heart of most beliefs, religious or
secular, such as compassion, living and striving together, and
caring."

http://tinyurl.com/yhmk7cd


In the Hampstead and Highgate Express:

"The trick with family shows is to pick a play with a simple story
and thumping heart, which allows the younger audience in. This is
why War Horse and Coram Boy worked so well, but Pratchett's
complicated work is much harder to control or simplify..."

http://tinyurl.com/yfy6fsw


And for those of you who missed it in last week's special edition --
Pterry reviews Nation live at the National:

"Look what they've done to my book": http://tinyurl.com/ybkt5e2

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

11) GUARDIAN BOOK CLUB TAKES ON UNSEEN ACADEMICALS

...though not in a game of football. Here, University College London
professor John Mullan takes a look at the latest Discworld novel:

"Early Pratchett novels were more thoroughly parodies of fantasy
literature, with the essential solemnity of Tolkien and his progeny
satisfyingly brought to earth... Now, 37 Discworld novels in, it is
clearly our world that is paralleled. The Times may officially be
the Ankh-Morpork Times, but it is the newspaper that we all know,
with its lame attempts at populism, its brilliant crosswords, and
its self-consciously measured tones... The book is larded with
allusions and literary jokes... If we are library lovers, like
Pratchett, there are jokes just for us..."

http://tinyurl.com/yj3t6c4


Also in the Guardian Book Club, Pterry writes about how Unseen
Academicals came together for him:

"Initially, I had seen Glenda as playing the nurse role in this
football-flavoured version of Romeo and Juliet. In a way, of course,
she does, flapping around after her young friend, as my father would
put it, like an old hen. But the book really began to take shape for
me when she began to think outside the little box of her life. I
have known many women like her; they mucked around at school, got
married and had some kids, and then realised that they had a fully
functional brain, often fearsomely so..."

http://tinyurl.com/ydybtud


...and faces a host of questions form his readers in live session:

"Many of those who asked questions when he came to speak at the
Guardian book club signalled the familiarity between author and
reader with a cheery salutation. Several testified to the global
reach of Discworld... His readers are even happy for him to tease
them about their questions. What other leading writer of fiction
could respond to a reader's slightly halting question with "I know
what you mean -- and even if I didn't know what you meant, I would
make it up"? ... Pratchett was entirely happy with this
conversation..."

http://tinyurl.com/yd4kz5d

[Editor's note: this was the same session that gave us the extract
in item 3 on page 1 of this issue.]

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

12) REVIEWS OF UNSEEN ACADEMICALS

12.1 In the Washington Post, English professor David Kirby reviews the
book: "Wordplay abounds in Pratchett's prose (a busman asks a
forgetful passenger, "My fare, lady?"), and his faux-medieval
dialogue sounds like it came straight from Sir Walter Scott's trash
can... A mash-up of 'Harry Potter' and 'Monty Python,' 'Unseen
Academicals' thrums with excess energy, and that's before the game
even begins..."

http://tinyurl.com/yd996aq


12.2 In the Guardian Book Club's blog section, Sam Jordison's long
and thoughtful review:

"Even now, after 20 years of Pratchett chart dominance and the
global phenomenon of the Harry Potter books he so clearly
influenced, the Discworld seems a mighty odd place... I hadn't read
a Discworld novel for a long time before picking up Unseen
Academicals, but it didn't take long for a sense of cosy familiarity
to envelop me. Pratchett's world may make a point of defying all
laws of physics and logic, but it adheres strictly to the rules of
human nature... It's unashamedly silly and straightforward, and it's
the fun of the ride that keeps you going rather than any worry about
where it is taking you. The fun and the humour -- which provides
the last and best explanation for Pratchett's popularity. Because he
is damn funny – though many of the jokes consist of the you-have-
to-be-there type that can't easily be conveyed in a blogpost. He's a
master of the unexpected turnaround, the absurd outcome, the comical
character and the slow-burning, long-running gag... it's hard not to
see reflections of Pratchett's well-publicised struggle with
Alzheimer's in one character's struggle to open doors within his
mind and unlock knowledge placed mysteriously outside his grasp.
That the book should remain so joyous in spite of this dark strand
is testament to Pratchett's unique talent..."

http://tinyurl.com/ycg527v

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

13) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS

GOING POSTAL IN READING

Progress Theatre presents their production of Stephen Briggs'
adaptation of Unseen Academicals in January and February 2010.

When: 28th January - 6th February 2010, with Matinees on 30th
January & 6th February 2010

Venue:Progress Theatre, The Mount, Christchurch Road, Reading,
Berkshire, RG1 5HL (Progress Theatre is located close to the
University campus, just off Christchurch Road near the start of the
Basingstoke Road)

Tickets: £10.00 (concessions £8.00)  available in advance from
Reading Arts Box Office (telephone: 0118 960 6060)

http://www.progresstheatre.co.uk/

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

14) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS: METAQUOTED

San Francisco Sentinel columnist Strange de Jim, who normally
collects and features interesting, unusual, funny or plain weird
quotations from real-life celebrities and news, found an extract
from Unseen Academicals worthy of inclusion (warning: contains
spoilers):

http://www.sanfranciscosentinel.com/?p=50926

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

15) OUR FAVOURITE AUTHOR -- IN LEGO?!

In Manchester (UK), a Lego-building contest offered some surprising
results -- including the face of Terry Pratchett:

"For the second round the contestants had to make portraits of
celebrities in under an hour. The judges' attention was caught by
impressive models of author Terry Pratchett, The Stone Roses singer
Ian Brown and Homer Simpson..."

(includes video)

http://tinyurl.com/yb6ssgg

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

16) IMAGES OF THE MONTH

The Librarian is watching you - armed with a camera!

http://tinyurl.com/yka54dd


...and Igors have breached the dimensional barrier and set up shop
in New York City:

http://tinyurl.com/yehrtyp

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

17) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS WANTS YOU!

Your vote, that is. E-zine Total Sci-fi Online is tallying reader
votes for the best science fiction and fantasy works of the year.
There are a number of categories, including Best Novel, and Unseen
Academicals is mentioned as a contender. To participate, email your
vote to totalscifionline@... with BEST NOVEL in the
subject line. Voting for all awards closes on 4 January, 2010 and
results will be announced on 5 January, 2010

http://tinyurl.com/yee9xf7

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

18) AUDIOBOOKS ATE'NT DEAD

In this interesting article, Good Omens co-author Neil Gaiman
discusses the history of audiobooks, what it's like to record one,
and whether an audiobook is a book or not:

"There are pitfalls you really only discover when you're reading
aloud. Inadvertent tongue twisters or clumsy sentences that make you
curse the author, which for me, is me..."

http://tinyurl.com/yauc7pl

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

19) GETCHYER 2010 DISCWORLD CALENDAR HEEEERE!

The Book Depository is offering a special price of AUD$16.84. This
includes free shipping to anywhere in Roundworld, and that's cutting
their own throats:

http://tinyurl.com/ycapnob

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

20) A SHIRT TO SCORE IN

...to score goals, that is. PJSM Prints are now offering Unseen
Academicals football shirts:

"This is a classic long-sleeved T-shirt. For this design we use
Gildan Ultra T's  which are 205gsm in weight. They have taped neck &
shoulder to maintain shape. Double stitched sleeve and waste hems.
100% pre-shrunk jersey cotton. The Image is applied using a hard-
wearing gold Superflex vinyl."

The Unseen Academicals team shirts are available in sizes Medium -
40", Large - 44", Extra Large - 48", Extra Extra Large - 52", and
are also available in "ladies skinni fit". In addition to the UU
shield and logo on the front, you can order your favourite player's
name and number on the back, with a choice of insignia including the
Librarian (number 1), Rincewind (7b), Ridcully (also 1), Macarona
(69), Stibbons (1.618), Trevor Likely (4, of course), Nutt (9), and
Nobbs (No Relation) (5).

Each shirt costs £18.00 plus shipping. To order, go to:

http://www.pjsmprints.com/tshirts/football-1.htm

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

21) JACQUELINE SIMPSON: A PROFILE

"At the time Terry suggested to Jacqueline that they work together
they were both in the middle of other projects but, 18 months later,
they started work on their book. Their collaboration was conducted
long distance, with discussions and comments being made by telephone
and by email. They would write a draft and then combine each
other's work into one script..."

http://www.oxfam.org.uk/applications/blogs/books/?p=2528

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

22) THE POWER OF GLOING

by Tamar

In UA much is made of the fact that the new football makes a
different kind of noise. Instead of thud, it goes gloing.

But the very first time we read "gloing", it isn't the sound of a
football. It's the sound of a flash of light in the darkness when
a candle is lit.

Terry once wrote about words that sound like things ought to sound
if they made a sound. He specifically mentioned words like glisten,
and glitter, which describe light but if that kind of light made a
sound, it would sound like those words. IIRC glitter was kind of a
hard, sharp-edged brightness, while glisten was more oily, had more
"s" in it.

Gloing. Just a flash of light in the darkness. Lighting a candle in
the darkness is a famous metaphor for bringing hope, for teaching,
for enlightening. If you added a "w" it would be "glowing".

In UU, a university, there is a huge candle. It represents the
centuries of attempts to teach, and even though once in a while the
shenanigans of tradition lead to a temporary darkness, officially
the candle never goes out. The Candle Knave attempts to teach his
assistant. He's not the only one. There's a lot of teaching going on
in UA. Nutt is first taught by letting him loose in a well-stocked
library, and by letting him watch people who know how to do things
well. Some of his lessons were taught by getting him to find them
out for himself. He uses those same methods when he teaches the UA
team.

The old football rules were found in an urn that was being pushed
out of the darkness. The guard unwittingly, but literally, called
for whatever it was to come out - and she came. Glowing.

Glenda taught Juliet, who learned more than Glenda had realized.
Trev even tried to teach Carter a few things. Nutt taught them, they
taught Nutt. Glenda taught a few things to Lady M, too. Pepe and
Madam Sharn also teach.

IMO the main theme of UA is teaching.

The thing is, it's not about football.


(Originally posted to alt.books.pratchett; reprinted with
permission)

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 2 -- continued on Part 3 of 3.
If you did not get all three parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2009 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- DECEMBER 2009 -- PART 3 OF 3 (continued)
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====Part 3 -- HOROSCOPE AND CLOSE

23) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE
24) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

23) THE NEW DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

by Fernando Magnifico

Buongiorno and thank you for all your letters and c-mails of support
while Fernando did his time in the stocks. Do not be afeared my
friends, for after visiting the local Igor to get his back adjusted,
Fernando is now better than ever after the experience, and his
membership of the Prognosticators Guild is renewed. Since the Lady
Asterisk is indisposed following an accident with a pound of butter
and a bag of turnips, Fernando can be your astrologer for today
without having to explain himself to the Patrician!

My friends, it is that time of the year again: Hogswatch is upon us,
and those who have been good peoples can expect the Hogfather to
fill their stockings with presents, and the bad peoples can expect
the bag of bloody bones. Fernando expects that there will be a lot
of bones in Quirm this week! (Ha ha, Fernando is making the little
joke, not all Quirmians are the bad peoples. It is only their
cheating footsballers, and their stinking referees, and their
stupido supporters, who give the rest a bad reputation.) Many people
have said to Fernando, "Fernando, you have such magnificent good
taste, what presents should I buy for my friends and family?". Of
course Fernando does not like to brag, but he does have the
magnificent taste in all things, so listen very carefully, and
between Fernando's taste and the wisdom of the stars your Hogswatch
buying decisions will be easy.

Ciao bella, and happy Hogswatch to all!

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Adamant Hedgehog  21 Mar - 20 Apr

Gifts to buy for Hoggers: jewellery, pets
Gifts to avoid: dragons

The best gift for the Hoggers this Hogswatch is jewellery, although
Fernando knows that jewellery is always the excellent gift for all!
Fernando suggests that gold medallions on chains are best for the
mans, the bigger the better. For those on a tight budget, Fernando
can recommend the artisanos on the Street of Cunning Artificers,
who have the most cunning goldish-plating which is almost
indistinguishable from the real thing except in full sunlight, or
when wet, or if you polish it too much, or too little. For the
womens, Fernando knows that the necklaces of pearls are very popular
in Morpork this season, while the ladies of Ankh prefer the sapphire
brooches.

Pets are also the good gift, especially the No Thingfjord Red
parrots, which can be trained to talk. For the small childrens,
kittens and puppies are always popular, especially in the Shades
where they don't get a lot of meat. But Fernando knows that the
Swamp Dragon is to be avoided -- they are so cute when newly
hatched, but when they get large enough to set fire to the kitchen
or eat a week's supply of coal in one day, you will be sorry! Trust
Fernando on this for he knows that this is so!

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Half-Eaten Sandwich  21 Apr - 21 May

Gifts to buy for Munchers: food
Gifts to avoid: Wow-Wow sauce

A gift of food is always welcome, especially if it is a big jar of
pickled onions, a ham, or a few tins of preserved peaches. Fernando
is reminded of the wonderful salamis his Uncle Enzo gives away each
year. (Except for his experiment last year -- the melon and pork
salami sounded like such a good idea too.) Pickles and sauces of all
types and flavours are welcome, except for the wow-wow sauce unless
the recipient has special training in handling hazardous materials.
Munchers, if some thoughtless person does not heed Fernando's most
excellente advise and gives you the jar of wow-wow sauce, the
experts at Unseen University will be more than happy to come and
dispose of it safely, especially if you have the cold pork pie or
roast goose.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Herne the Hunted  22 May - 21 Jun

Gifts to buy for Hernians: Gooseberries, forest herbs, garden-inna-
pot kits
Gifts to avoid: anything to do with huntin', shootin', or fishin'

We have reached the end of the Year of the Pensive Hare, and it
seems to many people that life is getting more difficult every year.
Fernando's grandfather is like that -- he is always complaining that
people today have no respect for their elders. Of course, Fernando
knows that when grandpappa was a young man, he evicted his own
mother from her home so he could the winters are colder and the
summers hotter, than the revenoo are more grasping. Of course,
Fernando knows that those people who say such things and Hernians
are always looking for the edge that gives them an advantage in
life, or in some cases, a running start on a postvital existence.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Wizard's Staff and Knob  22 Jun - 22 Jul

Gifts to buy for Staffies: books
Gifts to avoid: books

The best, and worst, gift for the Staffie is a book. As Fernando
knows, books are famous for giving people new ideas, and Staffies
have the very (how do you say it?) ambivalent attitude to the new
ideas. Staffies, especially those who are the actual wizards, have a
great deal of respect for book learning, so long as what they learn
is that they were right all along and they aren't troubled by
learning anything new. So Fernando suggests you choose your books
very carefully indeed before buying for the Staffie. Or if that
seems too difficult, a nice bottle of sherry will do.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Bilious, God of Hangovers  23 Jul - 23 Aug

Gifts to buy for Bilians: wine, beer, spirits
Gifts to avoid: salted pork, greasy meat pies, anything requiring
fine hand-eye coordination

Bilians are the easiest to buy for: anything with alcohol in it will
give many minutes of pleasure (and many more hours of discomfort) to
the Bilian. Fernando knows that this year is a good year for the
Brindisian vino, much better than the rubbish you get from Quirm,
and half the price too. Fernando has a cousin who can get you the
best quality red vino for wholesale prices. Or if you prefer, he
will sell you the bottle of the cheapest plonk, two gallons for a
penny. For an extra penny, he will put it in the fancy bottle with a
gold label. This makes a perfect gift for your unpleasant brother-
in-law who fancies himself the wine snob but actually can't tell the
difference between cat's water and best wine.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Celestial Parsnip  24 Aug - 23 Sept

Gifts to buy for Snippies: fine art, especially those prints of
Caravati's Three Large Pink Women and One Piece of Gauze
Gifts to avoid: iconographs

Fernando knows that Snippies are famous for their honesty, so a good
gift for a Snippie is a bijou piece of genuine art. Not one of those
forgeries that come from Quirm. Fernando remembers a time, oh cara
mia it is almost too painful to tell, when he bought a genuine
Mauvaise etching only to discover, when applying for the inn-sewer-
ants, that it was a knock-off by the infamous Quirmian forger
Etienne de Louche. On second thought, Fernando thinks you would be
better off to give one of those paintings of the big-eyed childrens
on velvet.

The stars warn that it is best to avoid giving the iconograph as a
gift to Snippies, especially if they are like Fernando's cousin
Tomas. It is molto difficult enough for Tomas to avoid getting in
trouble with the Watch for the looking in the ladies' windows at
night, without more temptation, if you take my meaning.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Small Boring Group of Faint Stars  24 Sept - 23 Oct

Gifts to buy for Boring'uns: potatoes, cabbage, paperclips, paper
napkins
Gifts to avoid: anything the least bit exciting

Good gifts for the Boring'uns include potatoes, fresh cabbages (but
not pickled -- they are much too strong for Boring'un tastes), or
paperclips and other small stationery supplies. Paper napkins are
also acceptable so long as they don't have anything too exciting
printed on them, like hunting scenes, dogs and cats, or the
Hogfather. Pictures of flying ducks are probably safe, so long as
they are flying *away*.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Androgyna Majestis  24 Oct - 22 Nov

Gifts to buy for Andies: shoes, clothes, sparkly dresses
Gifts to avoid: house plants

As everyone knows, Andies do not have the "green thumb" as they say
in Morporkian, and so house plants are best avoided. Shoes, on the
other foot (ha ha, Fernando has made the amusing joke) are the
excellente gift for Andies, so let Fernando tell you that the six-
inch stiletto heel (for the ladies) or the eight-inch platform sole
(for the mans) will never be out of fashion. My friends, Fernando
knows what you are thinking: "Clothes? Giving clothes as gifts is so
boring!" But do not be afeared, for the stars do not lie, and with
Fernando's help your gifts will be the wonder of Hogswatch, and not
at all like the beige cardigans that Fernando is given by his
grandmama Angelina every year. Three words, cara mia, and your gift
will be talked about until next Hogswatch: Leopard. Skin. Prints. Or
if you prefer, Fernando knows that spangly off-the-shoulder dresses
are a popular gift for Andies of all sexes. Just remember, my
friends: you can never have too many sequins.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Spoons, a.k.a. the Greater and Lesser Spoons,  23 Nov - 21 Dec

Gifts to buy for Spooners: scented candles, perfume
Gifts to avoid: cutlery, especially spoons

The stars are very certain that the scented candles and perfume will
make the good gifts for Spooners, especially for those who live near
the parts of town with the more ... robust ... smells: near the
river, the tanneries, the meat district, and to be honest, just
about everywhere within the city walls. Fernando knows that the best
scents are the subtle ones, like patchouli, jasmine, wahoonie
essence, and the Brindisian garlic-rose. But do not be like
Fernando's Uncle Alfonso, who uses Old Scallatine aftershave. You
can smell him coming three miles away upwind.

Fernando is amazed at how many people, even otherwise blameless
people, who get it in their heads to buy cutlery for Spooners. My
friends, you should listen carefully, for the stars have spoken:
there is nothing amusing about presenting a dozen spoons to a
Spooner at Hogswatch and making a witty remark. That's the sort of
thing that gets you bloody bones in your stockings next Hogswatch.
Trust Fernando on this.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Hoki the Jokester  22 Dec - 20 Jan

Gifts to buy for Hokians: gag-gifts
Gifts to avoid: mint humbugs

People know very well that Hokians like to play pranks and jokes on
others at Hogswatch. Once, Fernando's cousin Mario put a wild
polecat in a box, wrapped it in ribbons, addressed it to Auntie
Rosa-Marie, and left it under the Hogswatch tree. (If there are any
Hokians tempted to try this themselves, remember to leave airholes
in the box. Trust Fernando on this.) But very few peoples are aware
that Hokians also appreciate a good joke or gag-gift played on
themselves. So this Hogswatch, it is a good time to get back on your
Hokian friends and family for all the fake dog-doings, dribble
glasses, anonymous letters to the Watch, and other pranks you've
been putting up with for years. But the stars also give a warning on
what to avoid: ever since the unfortunate ... accident ... on Lord
Downey's birthday two years ago, neither the Assassin's Guild nor
the Patrician have had any sense of humour whatsoever when it comes
to mint humbugs.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Rather Large Gazunda  21 Jan - 18 Feb

Gifts to buy for Gazundians: small household knicknacks
Gifts to avoid: stick-and-bucket

The stars tell Fernando that Gazundians love the small knicknacks.
Fernando was confused when he cast this horoscope. My friends,
despite Fernando's molto excellente Morporkian speaking, Morporkian
is not his native language and some words are unknown to him.
Fernando first thought that this was something like the ladies'
undergarments, or perhaps something that the old mans do, like in
the famous Morporkian song about the old man with the counting
mania. But Fernando has now learned that the knicknacks are the
small things to go around the house, like the plaster ducks on the
wall, the gayly-painted cuckoo clocks, the small statues of Offler,
or the little plaster gnomes holding a mug of beer. Fernando
recommends the soup bowl in the shape of Great A'Tuin. Who would not
love such a present?

The stars say that this is not the auspicious time to give a stick-
and-bucket as a gift, even if they are from Lancre. Especially if
they are from Lancre. Fernando knows that there's more than enough
of that Morris Dancing these days without encouraging it.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Lesser Umbrage   19 Feb - 20 Mar

Gifts to buy for Umbragians: tartan, looms, handicrafts kits
Gifts to avoid: lockpicks, bagpipes, brass knuckles

Umbragians love working with their hands, and as they say, many
hands make light work, or in the case of the Nac Mac Feegle, many
hands make light fingers. Fernando has consulted the stars and they
say that the excellente gift for Umbragians is the makings for arts
and crafts -- paints and canvas, modelling clay, coloured paper,
jelly, or even one of those molto clever Make Your Own Lute sets for
the budding troubadour. How their faces will light up when they
receive these magnificent gifts! Fernando knows that the kindest
thing for Umbragians is to keep them occupied, so their minds will
not turn to the mischief. With a bit of luck, the right Hogswatch
gifts will keep them out of trouble for the whole of the new year.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

24) CLOSE

And there we have it. The Year of the Pensive Hare closes, the Year
of the Happy Goose opens, and may it bring good fortune to you all,
or at least reasonably interesting times (though not *too*
interesting). I'm off on my own holidays now, so we'll see you next
year. Happy New Year, and remember, don't drink and fly!

-- Annie Mac

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 3.
If you did not get all three parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2009 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
JANUARY 2010 (Volume 13, Issue 1)
*********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a FREE publication for members of the worldwide
Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North
American Discworld Society and other continental groups. Are you a
member? Yes, if you sent in your name, country and e-mail address.
Are there any dues? No! As a member of the Klatchian Foreign Legion,
you'd only forget them...
*********************************************************************
Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
Editor Emeritus (retd): Joseph Schaumburger
News Editor: Fiona (not Bruce) Bruce
Newshounds: Vera, Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow
Staff Writers: Asti Osborn, Pitt the Elder, Steven D'Aprano
Convention Reporters: Mithtrethth Hania Ogg et al
Staff Technomancer: Jason Parlevliet
Book Reviews: Drusilla D'Afanguin
Puzzle Editor: Tiff
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
DW Horoscope: Lady Anaemia Asterisk, Fernando Magnifico
Emergency Staff: Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare
time)
Copyright 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

------------------------------------------------------------------------

INDEX:

====Part 1 -- ALL THE NEWS THAT FITS

01) QUOTE OF THE MONTH
02) LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
03) PTERRY TO DELIVER DIMBLEBY LECTURE
04) NT LIVE "NATION" CINEMA UPDATES
05) NATION: BEST CHILDREN'S BOOK OF THE YEAR
06) PTERRY -- AND NATION -- SEEN LIVE AT THE NATIONAL
07) REVIEW: NATION LIVE AT THE NT
08) NEW MICRO ARTS DISCWORLD FIGURINES
09) AGNES NITT SINGS THAT FAMOUS ARIA
10) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
11) GOOD OMENS: A HOT TOPIC
12) REVIEW: THE "GODS TRILOGY"
13) OPINION: THE SCIENCE OF MAGIC

====Part 2 -- MORE NEWS, REVIEWS AND SUCH

14) CONVENTION NEWS
15) POSSIBLE SIGHTING OF A NEW TIFFANY ACHING USA COVER
16) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
17) "NATION" REFERENCE IN A "HARD" NEWS ARTICLE
18) REVIEW: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS
19) PRATCHETT FAN FUND-RUNNING FOR ALZHEIMER'S RESEARCH
20) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS: BEST SELLER FOR INDEPENDENTS
21) NEW DISCWORLD GOODIES FROM PJSM PRINTS
22) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

====Part 3 -- HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED, AND CLOSE

23) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE
24) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

01) QUOTE OF THE MONTH

"Oh dear, I'm feeling political today. It's just that it's dawned on
me that 'zero tolerance' only seems to mean putting extra police in
poor, run-down areas, and not in the Stock Exchange."

-- Terry Pratchett, alt.fan.pratchett

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

02) LETTER FROM THE (ACTING) EDITOR

Terry Pratchett, or to be precise, Terry Pratchett's books, first
came into my life when I was a young university student with a
science fiction fixation and a voracious appetite for reading. I
read just about anything with a space ship or a dragon on the cover,
and after two decades the details of most of them have faded. But I
still remember the first time I laid my hands on a Discworld novel:
it was "The Light Fantastic", and the oh-so-busy Josh Kirby cover
caught my eye, and I still remember the moment when I knew I had to
buy the book: it was the gag about the gods being powerless to act
because they were engaged in an eons-long war with the Ice Giants,
who had refused to return the lawnmower.

Discworld humour has become significantly more grownup since then,
much to the displeasure of the readers who think that Rincewind is
the be all and end all of characterisation. Don't get me wrong, I
love Rincewind as much as the next mad, obsessed fan who wants his
own Luggage and a hat with WIZZARD written on it in sequins. But I
want it all: I want the joys of plot, and character, philosophy and
meaning, as well as jokes and puns. Reading Pratchett's newer works,
I rarely laugh out loud like I used to in the Old Days. That's okay
though, the humour is still there, it's just different. Quieter,
more thoughtful, subtler, and leavened with deeper meaning and
significance. Pratchett's writing has matured and developed a keen
eye for the human condition. If we laughed at Rincewind, we learned
about self-control from Granny Weatherwax, and the tension between
power and freedom from Sam Vimes.

I'm grateful for Pratchett's hard work, and grateful that I was born
at the right time to enjoy it. He manages to show imagination,
insight, plotting and characterisation while still being accessible
and funny. Unfortunately, this means I find it harder and harder to
read other fiction (with a handful of exceptions), because I find
that they fall short of the high standard set by Pratchett. He has
spoiled other writers for me!

Oh well. I can always read Nation again.

-- Steven D'Aprano, Acting Editor

[Note: Annie Mac is on a holiday break. She aten't dead.]

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

03) PTERRY TO DELIVER DIMBLEBY LECTURE

Sir Terry Pratchett will be giving the prestigious Dimbleby Lecture
in February, as the first novelist ever to do so. His topic will be
how modern society needs to redefine how it deals with death.
"Shaking Hands With Death" will air on BBC One on 1st February.

BBC One Controller Jay Hunt said: "I'm absolutely delighted that one
of our most popular and best-loved authors has agreed to give this
lecture. Sir Terry Pratchett has spoken with great bravery and
honesty about his battle with Alzheimer's and I look forward to an
intelligent and thought-provoking speech."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/8458971.stm


For further information, visit the News page at PJSM Prints:

http://www.pjsmprints.com/news/index.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

04) NT LIVE "NATION" CINEMA UPDATES

The NT Live cinema showings of Nation continue this month. To find a
venue near you:

http://tinyurl.com/y986aqe
http://www.nationaltheatre.org.uk/ntlive

(National Theatre website pages)

http://tinyurl.com/ydf4esm

(includes trailer)

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

05) NATION: BEST CHILDREN'S BOOK OF THE YEAR

The Independent names Nation as best children's book of 2009:

"Does Nation merely count as a children's novel? As with Alice's
Adventures in Wonderland or Gulliver's Travels, delighted readers of
whatever age will swiftly cease to care..."

http://tinyurl.com/yd3r8ph

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

06) PTERRY -- AND NATION -- SEEN LIVE AT THE NATIONAL

In the Culture Witch blog, a post about the "platform event" at the
National Theatre in which Sir Terry Pratchett did a combination
interview/Q&A session before the evening's performance of Nation:

"...people just love Terry. He was in good form, considering he'd
already sat through at least four interviews... The drawback with a
platform event featuring two people `in conversation' is that
the audience only gets half as much as they do with someone talking
directly to the audience. I realise this suited Terry better, but we
would all have loved more..."

http://tinyurl.com/ycxvyd4

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

07) REVIEW: NATION LIVE AT THE NT

Broadway World's Gary Naylor review Nation live on stage at the
National Theatre in London:

"Luxuriating in the space of the Olivier Theatre, director Melly
Still creates an extraordinary tsunami that simultaneously wipes out
Mau's South Pacific Island Nation sparing him as he is away
undergoing his isolated, and ultimately incomplete, rite of passage
to manhood and shipwrecks aristocratic Ermintrude, a kind of
nineteenth century Hannah Montana with her confident resourcefulness
and precocious song and dance ability... If the story is a little
predictable (there's a local death cult and an evil butler with a
grudge to be fought off by our adolescent couple) the staging is
anything but... It's a splendid evening for the bright teenager
otherwise relentlessly glued to their phone..."

http://tinyurl.com/ydqrqo9

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

08) NEW MICRO ARTS DISCWORLD FIGURINES

The latest Discworld miniatures from Micro Arts Studio are "Esme on
broom", "The Bursar", "Nanny Ogg on broom", and "Margaret on broom"
(presumably Magrat). All figurines are priced at €10.98 except for
the Bursar figure which is priced at €8.54.

http://www.tabletopgamingnews.com/2010/01/19/32906

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

09) AGNES NITT SINGS THAT FAMOUS ARIA

A video from a Czech performance of Maskerade. Agnes, Salzella and
Andrei are excellent.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JlTYvCtvHHA&NR=1

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

10) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS

10.1 GOING POSTAL IN READING

Progress Theatre will present Steven Briggs' adaptation of Going
Postal this January and February.

Dates: Thursday 28 January - Saturday 6 February, 7:45pm.
Matinees on Sat 30 January and Sat 6 February, 2:30pm

Venue: The Progress Theatre
The Mount, Christchurch Road, Reading RG1 5HL
General Enquiries: 0845 867 9845

Tickets £10, Concessions £8
Subject to booking fee39

For tickets, call the Reading Arts box office on (0118) 960 6060 or
log on to www.readingarts.com

http://tinyurl.com/ydpcbvh
http://tinyurl.com/ydv5cqm

10.2 REVIEW: WYRD SISTERS IN BO'NESS

"This was a wordy play for the young cast, ranging from just 11
years old, to take on with some clever word-play and adult humour to
master -- and master it they did... What shone through in the whole
show was how much fun the cast were having. At times one or two just
couldn't contain their smiles at some of the funnier lines, but that
only added to their charm..."

http://tinyurl.com/y99uwpk

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

11) GOOD OMENS: A HOT TOPIC

The USA release of the Good Omens text and audiobook is hot news.

In the Daily Maverick:

"Is irony then the best way to deal with millenarianism, even though
the human feeling at the core of the phenomenon (desire for either a
better world or for no world) is understandable? If so, you can't
do much better than Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of
Agnes Nutter, Witch, co-written by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman.
First published in 1990, the book is recognised today as a sci-fi
classic..."

http://tinyurl.com/ybf5uyf


An article on ABC (Australia) News about GK Chesterton's novel "The
Man Who Was Thursday", that supposedly inspired Pratchett and Gaiman
to write Good Omens:

http://tinyurl.com/ybhnb96


A review on boston.com (the Boston Globe online) of the Good Omens
audiobook:

"Good Omens was originally published as a young-adult fantasy title
in 1990, but has been released by the adult arm of Harper Collins.
Smart move, because most adults might have bypassed this delicious
farce, and it is just too clever to miss, especially with Martin
Jarvis narrating..."

http://tinyurl.com/yc3weqm


Another review, in the Sarasota Herald Tribune (Florida):

"'Good Omens' by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett is a book that
requires that you pay attention while listening. It's not one that
can warble along as background audio in your head. The book,
published in 1990, is just now coming to audio, and is so much fun
to read OR listen to that I suggest you round up a copy ASAP... Our
two authors, both of whom had illustrious science-fiction careers
both before and since 'Good Omens' was published, do a marvelous job
here of making Armageddon seem both horrifyingly real and absolutely
laughable..."

http://tinyurl.com/y9jkvbj

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

12) REVIEW: THE "GODS TRILOGY"

A review of the Gods trilogy (Pyramids, Small Gods, and Hogfather):

"I lent [Pyramids] to two different people. One person said, "It was
too weird, I didn't bother after the first few pages." The other
said, 'Wow, I wasn't sure what to think when I first started reading
it, but I really love this author now. You know something? He is
really funny!' If you are a fan of the quirky, the zany, puns, and
intelligent humor, check out this book. As a side note to new Terry
Pratchett readers, I recommend starting with the second book, 'Small
Gods,' before starting 'Pyramids' as it is a better introduction to
his way of thinking..."

http://newsblaze.com/story/20100109112159moxy.nb/topstory.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

13) OP-ED: THE SCIENCE OF MAGIC

An interesting opinion piece by Chad Orzel. He discusses "urban
fantasy" and how he feels it needs to have its own "science" like
the Discworld books do. "In reading a lot of the new urban fantasy,
I find myself wanting the Ponder Stibbons story-- I want to see what
this world looks like from the perspective of the nerdy guy who
disdains tradition, and sits down to figure out the exact amount of
mouse blood required to summon Death for a conversation... That's
one of the things that lets the later Pratchett books transcend the
parodic origins of Discworld... It's kept the setting from getting
stale, even though he's written more than three dozen novels in it."

http://tinyurl.com/ye4jkrp

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 1, continued on Part 2 of 3.
If you did not get all three parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- JANUARY 2010 -- PART 2 OF 3 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 2 -- MORE NEWS, REVIEWS AND SUCH

14) CONVENTION NEWS
15) POSSIBLE SIGHTING OF A NEW TIFFANY ACHING USA COVER
16) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
17) "NATION" REFERENCE IN A "HARD" NEWS ARTICLE
18) REVIEW: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS
19) PRATCHETT FAN FUND-RUNNING FOR ALZHEIMER'S RESEARCH
20) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS: BEST SELLER FOR INDEPENDENTS
21) NEW DISCWORLD GOODIES FROM PJSM PRINTS
22) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE (MARCH-JULY)

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

14) CONVENTION NEWS

14.1 NADWCON NEWS

NADWCon 2011: Catching Up On Discworld: The Once and Future Con

Greetings, all Discworld fans and convention-goers! As most of you
are probably already aware, the first ever North American Discworld
Convention took place in Tempe, Arizona from September 4-7, 2009,
and was deemed a big success by guests and attendees alike! Once
again, I and the entire 2009 committee would like to thank all of
our amazing guests, participants, committee, staff, volunteers, and
attendees for helping to make the con the wonderful experience that
it was. Thank you! I have linked many photos, videos, and accounts
of the convention on the convention website, so if you haven't yet
seen that, please feel free to head over there and take a look:
http://www.nadwcon.org.

The 2009 committee was delighted to hear that everyone had such a
great time, and honored to learn that, due to the convention's
success, many are clamoring for another one! Our Guest of Honor, Sir
Terry Pratchett himself, has said that he is definitely willing to
appear again as Guest of Honor (health and circumstances permitting)
should there be another NADWCon.

The committee has been approached by representatives of several
cities interested in hosting the next North American Discworld
Convention, and thus, after consulting with Sir Terry Pratchett, a
North American Discworld Convention Steering Committee (to be known
hereafter as "The Guild of Chelonavigators") has been formed from
among several folks intimately involved in the successful
organization and presentation of NADWCon 2009. The purpose of this
oversight committee is to: 1) determine the next convention location
and organizing group; 2) offer guidance and information to the next
convention committee as it prepares for NADWCon 2011; 3) maintain a
consistent archive of information and data related to past NADWCons;
and 4) manage any con-related funds or properties during transition
periods between cons. The members of The Guild are as follows:

Voting Officers:
- Emily S. Whitten, Esq. (Chair)
- Denise Connell
- Margaret Grady
- Patrick Harkin Sr.
- Jean Tillson

Chelonavigational Consultant:
- Anna M. Caggiano


Regarding the decision as to where NADWCon 2011 will be held, it has
been decided to ask for bid proposals from any fan organization
interested in hosting the next con. These will be carefully
considered by The Guild before a decision is made and a group
chosen, after which The Guild and the 2009 committee will pass the
torch of our responsibility and experience as the organizers of this
unique Discworldian event to the chosen group, but will remain
available for consultation as a source of information, guidance, and
resources.

If you love the idea of having an NADWCon in your city, and are
considering proposing your local group and city as the best host for
the next NADWCon, please first carefully consider both the goals and
responsibilities of this convention, some of the main ones being:

- To provide a well planned, smooth and well organized, exciting and
uniquely fun Discworld experience for new and old Discworld fans of
all ages, as well as for our guests;
- To make the convention easily accessible and reasonably affordable
for fans to attend;
- To meet or exceed the level of programming and fun experiences
provided by the first NADWCon, including such staples as a charity
auction, gala banquet, and Discworld Maskerade;
- To retain the Discworld flavor and culture of a Pratchett-centric
convention;
- To keep proper records and responsible accountings of the planning
and management of the NADWCon, and to preserve these for future
archiving with The Guild of Chelonavigators.

Please also be aware that planning a convention of this magnitude
requires the dedication, determination, and cooperation of a number
of experienced organizers with excellent planning, teamwork,
organizational and communication skills. Planning and running a
convention can be an amazing experience, but please remember that it
requires a lot of time and hard work, as well as a willingness to
put the good of the convention first. Any group that bids for the
next NADWCon should have a number of willing and experienced
volunteers local to the convention location to form the backbone of
their potential convention committee.


14.2 AUSDWCON NEWS

NULLUS ANXIETAS III IN 2011: NO WORRIES, MATE!

The AusDWcon organisers have announced the dates and venue for
Nullus Anxietas III, the third Australian Discworld Convention:

"We're looking forward to having yet another excellent weekend
filled with entertaining performances, interesting discussions and
wonderful people."

When: 08/04/11 ‐ 10/04/11
Where: Penrith Panthers, Penrith, NSW

There are no events, guests or schedules posted yet, but watch the
AusDwcon site because a little bird has whispered to WOSSNAME that
Nullus Anxietas III will be a truly well organised convention.

http://ausdwcon.org/events/22

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

15) POSSIBLE SIGHTING OF THE NEXT TIFFANY ACHING USA COVER?

From a blogger called Miss Eliza:

"Bill Mayer, the artist behind the Wintersmith cover and the covers
of the re-releases of Wee Free Men and A Hat Full of Sky happened to
have this picture in his flickr stream... Sadly his website is under
construction, so it's hard to find out any more corroborating
evidence, though this was captioned: 'New Terry Pratchett book
cover!'..."

Is it the real thing or is it fan art? Any way it is a good picture.

http://tinyurl.com/y8chzoe

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

16) IMAGES OF THE MONTH

A surprised coconut, or trainee librarian:

http://tinyurl.com/yl2amke

The perfect wedding cake for Igors:

http://tinyurl.com/yab353d

Links courtesy of Mrs Cake of Bugarup University.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

17) PRATCHETT NOVEL REFERENCE IN "HARD" NEWS

In the Daily Mail (UK), an article about attempts to rescue children
from the rubble of the Haitian earthquake refers to Daphne's rescue
of Mau from Locaha's domain in Nation:

"She was alive. There was hope. She had managed to cheat death.
There is, deep within all of us, the desire to do the same -- no
matter how much our rational mind may tell us it is nonsense. It
pervades our literature -- from the myth of Orpheus, who visited the
underworld and survived, through to Terry Pratchett's latest novel,
millennia later, in which the heroine brings back her friend from
the dead."

http://tinyurl.com/y9h6yyr

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

18) REVIEW: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS

A short review and enthusiastic recommendation in the Sunday Times
(UK):

"Despite the author being diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer's
disease in 2007, fans are delighted to find that Discworld lives on
in 'Unseen Academicals', Pratchett's 37th Discworld novel. The book
is everything readers have come to expect from the satirist heralded
as the 'the purely funniest English writer since Wodehouse'..."

http://tinyurl.com/y8oprre

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

19) PRATCHETT FAN FUND-RUNS FOR ALZHEIMER'S RESEARCH

Tolkien Society member and Pratchett fan Mike Percival is running to
raise money for Alzheimer's research: "So I thought to myself 'what
next'? How can I keep the challenge going? And I came up with a
challenge for myself. During the course of the winter and spring of
2009/2010, I would undertake four trail running half marathons, and
I would add commitment and motivation by doing them in aid of four
of my favourite charities'..."

http://tinyurl.com/ydqxt2n

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

20) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS: BEST SELLER FOR INDEPENDENTS

Locus Magazine reports that Unseen Academicals is the #1 bestselling
hardcover among independent booksellers.

http://www.locusmag.com/Magazine/2010/Issue01_Bestsellers.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

21) PJSM PRINTS PRESENTS: NEW CMOT DIBBLER BADGES

PJSM Prints is offering a new range of Discworld badges (lapel pins)
designed by Stephen Briggs. Ranging in price from £2.50 to £4.25
and in size from 14mm to 45mm, the selection includes "I Ate'nt
Dead", the Uberwald League of Temperance Black Ribbon, the Luggage,
the Uberwald Blood Donors badge, the Librarian "Ook" badge, and
several others. Some of the range is already sold out:

http://www.pjsmprints.com/cmot/index.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

22) THE NEW DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

by Fernando Magnifico

Buongiorno my friends! Or as they say in Fourecks, g'day mate! My
friends, you may have noticed a few XXXXian backpackers drunk in the
streets lately. To be precise, you may have noticed a few XXXXians
*drunker* in the streets. This is because the Fourecksians are
celebrating Best Bloody Bewt Country On The Gods' Own Disc Day this
week, celebrating the federation of the nation from half a dozen
independent breweries. Fernando will be your astrologer this month,
as Lady Asterisk has sprained her wrist opening a can of Fourecksian
beer. So in honour of the Fourecksian national day, Fernando has
asked the stars what XXXXian person or thing you are most associated
with.

Ciao cobber!

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Adamant Hedgehog  21 Mar - 20 Apr

Hoggers are well known for being solid, down-to-earth, with the
determined, no-nonsense personality, like Fernando's Aunt Maria, who
once drove off a wild boar by hitting it with her broom. As such,
the stars say that Hoggers are most like the Fourecksian wombat.
When Fernando travelled to Fourecks some years ago, he saw a wombat,
and he can best describe it as the cross between a tailless badger
and a pile of bricks. Do not let any Fourecksian try to tell you
that wombats eat the solid rocks, Fernando knows this is the joke
they like to play on the visitors. The wombats don't eat rocks. They
just dig through them.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Half-Eaten Sandwich  21 Apr - 21 May

Munchers, you are associated with the Fourecksian game of
Grasshopper. Two teams of twelve people play. Eleven people from one
side come out on a grassy field while the twelfth stays inside and
gets started on the drinking. Two people from the other team come
out carrying large wooden sticks called "bats", and the first team
repeatedly throws a small red ball at the "batters", who try to
avoid hitting the ball. Then they stop for lunch and drinking, and
swap sides. They can keep this up for up to five days, unless
interrupted by rain or if the beer runs out.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Herne the Hunted  22 May - 21 Jun

Fourecks is a land of many deadly animals, like the Tunnelling
Spider, the Man-Eating Albatross, the Carnivorous Pigeon, and the
Marsupial Dragon. Herne the Hunted is the god of the small
inoffensive creatures whose destiny it is to be eaten by the deadly
beasts, and as such, the stars tell Fernando that you are associated
with the Witchetty Grub: small, inoffensive, utter harmless, tasting
slightly of potato, and consequentemente eaten by all the other
animals and a few of the plants as well.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Wizard's Staff and Knob  22 Jun - 22 Jul

Sometimes the stars give Fernando the most surprising information,
something nobody would have expected. This is not one of those
times, for they say that Staffies are closely associated with the
wizards of Fourecks. But what many people don't know is that
Fourecks has its own school of wizardry, Bugarup University, which
the XXXXians will tell you is older than Ankh-Morpork's Tower of
Art. Unseen University's wizards will argue that this doesn't count,
because even though BU is tens of thousands of years old, it's only
been tens of thousands of years old for the last two or three
hundred years, while UU has been thousands of years old for
thousands of years. And the XXXXian wizards will reply that it takes
a lot of really powerful magic to make something older than it is,
and so the argument begins.

(continued in Part 3)

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-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 2 -- continued on Part 3 of 3.
If you did not get all three parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- JANUARY 2010 -- PART 3 OF 3 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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====Part 3 -- HOROSCOPE AND CLOSE

23) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE (JULY-MARCH)
24) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

23) THE NEW DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED

Bilious, God of Hangovers  23 Jul - 23 Aug

Fernando knows that Bilians are no strangers to the effects of too
much alcohol, including but not limited to the throwing up, or
"chunder" as they say in Fourecks, where they have turned it into a
national pastime. The next time you have over-indulged in a fine
Fourecksian table wine like Chateau de Plonk or Riddgydidge Red
("guaranteed well-sieved!" as it says on the bottle), remember that
the stars have spoken: with a little training and dedication, you
could be a competition chunderer in Fourecks.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Celestial Parsnip  24 Aug - 23 Sept

Fernando knows that some unkind peoples accuse Fourecks of not
having any original foods. This is not true, and the stars say that
Snippies are the most closely associated with one of them. Everyone
knows that Fourecks is famous for its meat pies, but another famous
Fourecksian food is the Beefo Roll. Made from mutton, carrots,
celery, barley, herbs and spices, in a thick pastry roll and then
deep fried in mutton fat, the Beefo roll can be found any time
hungry Fourecksians have a beer in their other hand. My friends, if
you are wondering why the Beefo roll is made from mutton rather than
beef, Fernando wonders the same thing. Perhaps it started off like
Uncle Enzo's truffle-and-pork salami, which started off as one pig,
one truffle, and each year the truffle got smaller and smaller until
it was completely gone. But it is still Uncle Enzo's famous truffle-
and-pork salami.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Small Boring Group of Faint Stars  24 Sept - 23 Oct

Fourecksians will tell you that there is nothing boring about XXXX,
but Fernando knows that this is not true. With the help of the
stars, Fernando has learned what Boring'uns are associated with: the
third day of a Grasshopper test match, after the shine has worn off
the ball but before the streakers start dashing across the field.
The sun is shining, the weather is warm, with just the faintest
breeze giving assistance to the left-arm spinners, but not enough to
make the batters work hard, and Fernando knows that under these
conditions a good batter can keep the game from being the slightest
bit interesting for anything up to four hours.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Androgyna Majestis  24 Oct - 22 Nov

Fernando is the very open-minded, and so he is very understanding
that Andies often have the male aspect and the female aspect to
their lives. Of course, all people have their two sides, but for
Andies this is often much more so than for others. Those who do not
know Fourecks very well would perhaps think that it would be the
inhospitable place for such Andies who have the, how do you say it,
flexible attitude towards the gender roles. Fourecks is the place
where the men are men and the women are bloody sheilas, as they say.
But listen carefully, my friends, for Fernando knows that even in
Fourecks things are not always so simple. The stars agree, for they
say that Andies are most associated with the famous "Petunia the
Desert Princess". If you can punch like a bloke and look good in a
dress like a sheila, you will fit right in.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Spoons, a.k.a. the Greater and Lesser Spoons,  23 Nov - 21 Dec

Spooners, the stars say you are most associated with the most famous
Fourecksian animal, the giant bouncing rat or kangaroo. The kangaroo
is the very wonderful beast, up to the size of a large man, and is
most well known for its uniquemente way of moving by bouncing at
high- speed. But Fernando knows that the kangaroo is also the very
intelligent animal, and they are very well known for rescuing the
small boys who have fallen down the wells or become trapped in the
caves. They also make excellente eating. The kangaroos, not the
small boys. Fernando would never recommend eating the bambinos.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Hoki the Jokester  22 Dec - 20 Jan

Fourecksians have a robust sense of humour, usually involving the
sort of language that Fernando will not repeat, partly because he is
a gentlemans, but mostly because if Aunt Maria ever finds out
Fernando knows those words she will hit him with her broom. Fernando
knows that they have no Fools' Guild in XXXX, anyone is free to tell
the jokes and be hit in the face with a meat pie or have a pint of
beer poured down their trousers, and so Fourecks is famous for her
jokers and comic minstrels. Fernando knows that one or two of them
are even famous for being funny. Hokians, the stars say that you are
most associated with Bazza Hoges, who made a career out of telling
jokes and setting fire to prawns.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Rather Large Gazunda  21 Jan - 18 Feb

Gazundians, the stars have told Fernando that you are most like the
Fourecksian bush: a bit dry and dusty, unusual to Morporkian eyes,
but with the bellissima harsh beauty that people learn to love. My
friends, you are probably making the same mistake that Fernando
first made. (Yes, it is true, as magnificent as Fernando is,
sometimes he makes the mistakes. The small ones.) You are probably
wondering if Fourecks has one bush, perhaps it is near the black
stump they talk about. But do not be fooled, my friends, for "the
bush" does not mean a lone bush. It is like "the forest", only with
less green and more dangerous snakes.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Lesser Umbrage   19 Feb - 20 Mar

Umbragians, the stars say you are associated with the man that
Fourecksians will tell you is the best footsballer in the best
footsball game of all, XXXXian Footy. Fernando is not one to make
fun of the afflicted, but how anyone can compare such a game with
the real footsball is a mystery even the stars cannot answer. What
sort of game hits the ball with the hand instead of the head?
Greatest sport or not, the stars say you are associated with the
famous Eddie "Trasha" Junkers, who once turned up to a game so drunk
he couldn't remember his name and still managed to kick 75 goals: 45
for his team and 30 for the opposition.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

24) CLOSE

That brings the January issue to a close. See you next month, same
time, same place.

-- A.E. (not Pessimal)

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 3.
If you did not get all three parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
FEBRUARY 2010 (Volume 13, Issue 2)
*********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a FREE publication for members of the worldwide
Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North
American Discworld Society and other continental groups. Are you a
member? Yes, if you sent in your name, country and e-mail address.
Are there any dues? No! As a member of the Klatchian Foreign Legion,
you'd only forget them...
*********************************************************************
Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
Editor Emeritus (retd): Joseph Schaumburger
News Editor: Fiona (not Bruce) Bruce
Newshounds: Vera, Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow
Staff Writers: Asti Osborn, Pitt the Elder, Steven D'Aprano
Convention Reporters: Mithtrethth Hania Ogg et al
Staff Technomancer: Jason Parlevliet
Book Reviews: Drusilla D'Afanguin
Puzzle Editor: Tiff
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
DW Horoscope: Lady Anaemia Asterisk, Fernando Magnifico
Emergency Staff: Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare
time)
Copyright 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

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------------------------------------------------------------------------

INDEX:

====Part 1 -- ALL THE NEWS THAT FITS

01) QUOTE OF THE MONTH
02) LETTER FROM THE (ACTING) EDITOR
03) A LETTER FROM THE MASTER
04) NATION AT THE NT NEWS AND REVIEWS

====Part 2 -- MORE NEWS, REVIEWS AND SUCH

05) NATION AT THE NT NEWS AND REVIEWS, CONTINUED
06) PTERRY'S DIMBLEBY LECTURE: "SHAKING HANDS WITH DEATH"
07) GUILD OF SEAMSTRESSES CREST BADGE NOW AVAILABLE

====Part 3 -- EVEN MORE NEWS AND REVIEWS

08) PTERRY AND ALZHEIMER'S NEWS
09) REVIEW: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS AUDIO BOOK
10) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
11) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS STILL GOING STRONG
12) CONVENTION NEWS
13) ACTION REPLAY: PTERRY'S BLOOPER REEL
14) NEW FOLKLORE MUSEUM AND RESOURCE
15) ODDITIES OF NOTE
16) IMAGE OF THE MONTH
17) HOW TO READ IN THE BATH
18) "NATION" MELMEET REPORT AND REVIEW

====Part 4 -- REPORT CONTINUED, REVIEW, AND HOROSCOPE

19) "NATION" MELMEET REPORT AND REVIEW, CONTINUED
20) NATION (NOVEL) REVIEW
21) NT'S NATION: LOVED IN BOSTON
22) EBOOK WARS: KOBO JOINS IN
23) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE, MARCH > MAY

====Part 5 -- HOROSCOPE CONTINUED, AND CLOSE

24) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE,  MAY > MARCH
25) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

01) QUOTE OF THE MONTH

"I'm writing a lot. I'm just signing up for two more books. I'm
always writing. If they can put a pencil and a paper in my coffin,
I'll write there too."

--Sir Terry Pratchett, 2010

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

02) LETTER FROM THE (ACTING) EDITOR

Sir Terry Pratchett has recently signed a petition asking the
British government to pass further laws against file-sharers. This
law, if passed, will enable copyright owners to have entire
households cut off from the Internet, potentially for years at a
time, because of the actions of a single individual in that house.
The seriousness of this collective punishment to the entire
household and not just the offender should not be underestimated.
The Internet is rapidly becoming to the 21st century what the postal
service, telephone and television combined were to the 20th, only
more so. The European Union has even recognised Internet access as a
basic necessity for prisoners in jail, on a par with the ability to
receive visits from family or to receive education and
rehabilitation.

Although I haven't had to "change banks having filled the first one
up" like Sir Terry, I have smithed a few words in my time, both for
the love of it and for profit. Speaking as both a reader and a
writer, I believe that Sir Terry has made a grievous error by
signing this petition. Independent studies show that the claims of
losses from file-sharing are vastly inflated, but even if they were
correct, the cure suggested is much worse than the disease.

Copyright holders are already abusing the existing laws daily, and
the proposed legislation not only fails to remove the avenues for
abuse but it adds new ones. Sir Terry's admirably restrained and
generally sensible attitude towards non-commercial or semi-
commercial copyright infringement (such as fan fiction and
unauthorised amateur performances of Discworld plays) is so
completely at odds with his support of this bad law that I'm at a
loss to understand it. But whatever the reason, it has led to a
small but growing number of fans calling for a boycott of his work.

A number of highly influential publishers and authors, including
science fiction writers Eric Flint, Charles Stross and Cory
Doctorow, believe that not only has the threat from file-sharing
been exaggerated, but that it is actually good for business. Not
content with empty words, they have made their work available for
free download without copy protection or DRM (Digital Restrictions
Management) software. To authors who have embraced the Internet-
savvy generation, file-sharing isn't a threat but their life-blood,
and the chilling effect of this law will hurt 21st century writers
far more than it will help established ones like Sir Terry.

I'd like to finish with a quote from author Charles Stross:

"Back before the Internet came along, we had a very special term for
the people who buy a single copy of a book and then allow all their
friends to read it for free. We called them librarians."

-- Steven D'Aprano, Acting Editor


Selected further reading:

Cory Doctorow - http://tinyurl.com/yl9w9fy
Charles Stross - http://tinyurl.com/ygdbcc8
The Baen Free Library - http://www.baen.com/library/
O'Reilly Books - http://tinyurl.com/6oddbc

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

03) A LETTER FROM THE MASTER

Folks,

So many people have contacted me since the Richard Dimbleby lecture
that there is no possibility at all that I can reply to everyone
individually.

Generally speaking people are asking what they can do to help,
support and, indeed, take some control over their own death. The
people to contact for all this are at Dignity in Dying --
www.dignityindying.org.uk -- they can campaign better than two
blokes in an office.

I'm getting some interesting letters though, some of them are from
couples who have refrained from having children for the good of the
planet, and now fear facing their final illness with no one to fight
their corner. The same thinking seems to be affecting people who are
happily single. Suddenly the ties of family seem more attractive
than once they did. As one lady said "saying that friends are the
new family is all very well, but it starts to ring hollow as we get
older."

I want to make it clear what it is that I have been saying recently
since retelling can change things.

I think that assisted death should be available to people who
clearly have a serious and incurable disease and are demonstrably
capable of making their wishes felt and clearly do understand their
situation.

And that is that. Causing or assisting the death of somebody who has
not made their wishes publicly clear should be treated, at least
initially, as murder. If there are exonerating circumstances, then
the legal system is capable of recognising these. We are not, by and
large an uncaring and punitive society.

The tribunal idea which the charity Dignity in Dying is
investigating is a suggestion, and at the moment only that.

I believe it could help those unclear about the law and the
guidelines, and also act as a gentle filter, identifying the
hypothetical pressured grannies that opponents of assisted dying
continue to summon up as an argument, but also perhaps to suggest
that a future that currently looks dark may yet be improved. I
suspect that the majority of people seeking assisted death will be
individuals in every sense of the word, looking for an organised
death after a productive and organised life. I'm probably one of
them. But I must say, it is a pleasure to meet other people with
PCA, even if only to share anecdotes with those who truly know where
you're coming from. A trouble shared is not halved, whatever the
proverb says, but at least it is understood.

The generation currently sliding into old age must surely be the
first one ever to grow up unfamiliar with the realities of death. It
has been hidden away, not spoken of, not acknowledged. It would be
better for our mental health to do so.

I can just remember, when I was a child, that sometimes you would
see somebody wearing a black band around their arm, as a sign of
mourning. I've seldom seen them as an adult. But now the task of
dying is left to us, we might as well get good at it.

On a more cheerful note, I'm working my way through the second
draft of I Shall Wear Midnight, but as ever fighting for writing
time among all the other calls. I shall be back on the sofa of the
One Show on Thursday 11th February at 7pm on BBC One and I hope to
get my Seamstresses Guild Crest before bumping into Christine
Bleakley again :)

Late News: We've been told that my sword is ready for viewing; I
couldn't have any hand in the making of the horn hilt or the
silverwork. Sadly, I won't get to see it until next week.

All the best.

Terry Pratchett

The original message can be viewed at PJSM Prints:
http://www.pjsmprints.com/news/index.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

04) NATION AT THE NT NEWS AND REVIEWS

4.1 The live London production reviewed by David Finkle for
Theatermania:

"Nation appears to be a belated strike against imperialism and a
hearty vote for societies and civilizations wherever they've
developed. Rather than being invaded and subsumed, they must be
celebrated and honored -- a notion that would not have received much
sympathy in 19th-century England, but is undeniably popular now as
the world gathers to help rebuild earthquake-shaken Haiti...
Daphne's rank -- she is 130th in line to the British throne -- puts
her in a position where she must choose between her origins and her
newfound loyalties to a crowd much given to singing and dancing and
worshipping an all-powerful god called Imo. What she decides she
must do further emphasizes Pratchett's beliefs about disparate
countries... The humans involved -- led by the energetic and likable
Carr and Taaffe -- give their all to the general merriment..."

http://www.theatermania.com/london/reviews/01-2010/nation_24274.html


4.2 NATION AT THE NATIONAL CINECAST: THE KUDOS AND THE CAVILS

A review by WOSSNAME's Annie Mac

So. At last I've seen Nation on the National Theatre stage, or as
close as those of us who live at the bottom of the world can come to
it: a cinecast of the live performance of 30th January, shown in
Australian cinemas on the 13th of February.

Nation is one of my favourite novels by any author in any era, and
in my opinion it was far too large a story for a stage adaptation to
do it sufficient justice. Now that I've seen Nation as a play, my
opinion is unchanged -- but I do think that Mark Ravenhill, Melly
Still, and the National Theatre cast and crew made a very good try,
and came away with a win on technical merit. Here are my
observations:

* There was something many reviewers didn't like that I liked very
much.

* There was something almost every reviewer (and viewer) liked that
I didn't much like at all.

* There were some things that many Pratchett fans -- and some
reviewers, presumably also Pratchett fans -- objected to that I
thought were not only reasonable but also rather cleverly done.

I'm not a great fan of modern theatre, mostly because I find it to
be too dependent on Ye Suspenders of Disbelief; I don't like it when
the script staggers under the weight of infodump (owing to the
constraints of trying to depict what only carefully edited film can
truly show), and even more than that I really, really don't like to
see the wires. So when I first heard, months ago, that Nation would
include puppetry and mock-ups of the ocean and the tsunami, I was
less than impressed.

And I was even less impressed when I heard there would be music,
because I have a lifelong distaste for almost all musicals, since I
see them as the worst sort of compromise, with neither the dialogue
nor the music strong enough to stand alone and the sight of cast
members bursting into song in the midst of a story little short of
risible. But when I watched the rehearsal videos on the NT website I
found the music moved me, so I was ready to forgive. In the event,
however, no forgiveness was required: Nation-the-play is *not*
Nation: the Musical. The song and dance numbers weren't a substitute
for dialogue, but rather a believable depiction of the Pelagic
Islanders' ancient traditions of praising their gods through music
-- punctuation rather than text, as it were -- and it worked very
well indeed.


(review continues in Part 2)

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 1, continued on Part 2 of 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- FEBRUARY 2010 -- PART 2 OF 5 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 2 -- MORE NEWS, REVIEWS AND SUCH

05) NATION AT THE NT NEWS AND REVIEWS, CONTINUED
06) PTERRY'S DIMBLEBY LECTURE: "SHAKING HANDS WITH DEATH"

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

05) NATION REVIEWS, CONTINUED

5.1 Review by Annie Mac, continued

The puppetry didn't completely work for me. The pig was fantastic
and 'baby Twinkle' was surprisingly lifelike due to the players'
deft handling of 'him' (I imagine it took a lot of rehearsal, which
definitely paid off), but I found the grandfather birds distracting
because their operators were plainly visible (I also disliked the
look of them. They looked nothing like the way they were described
in the book! -- far too skeletal and un-bird-like. Several people
who saw the cinecast with me said the grandfather bird puppets
reminded them of some creatures from The Dark Crystal, but as my
interest in Hensonry has never extended beyond the Muppet Show and
the original '70s Yoda, I've no idea if this is so).

The ocean scenes were surprisingly less inept than I would have
expected, though again, I found the plainly visible presence of the
designated sheet-billowers irritating. But the *underwater* scenes
-- which, we were told in behind-the-scenes footage during the
interval, were achieved by cast lookalikes air-swimming behind a
translucent screen whilst being raised and lowered on ropes -- were
fabulous and completely believable. Nor was I alone in this opinion,
because I could hear a round of sharply drawn breaths throughout the
audience the first time we were shown this effect.

Also on the subject of set design, I found the sculptures and
symbols in the ancients' cave a bit too rough and simplistic. When
reading the novel, I had the strong impression that the contents of
the cave were very sophisticated indeed - in fact, that they were
the original artefacts from which that universe's Greco-Roman art
and statuary descended! - but the stage props looked more to me like
Easter Island stuff with a bit of gilt on it.

And then there was the parrot. I did not like the parrot. I did not
like the parrot *at all*. Oh, sure, the parrot's dialogue was great
fun and wonderfully timed, but I found Jason Thorpe himself very
off-putting, and I think director Still and costume designer Dinah
Collin were way off-track with the look of the character, from the
typical clueless-git-on-the-twenty-first-century-street hairstyle
(why not wear a parrot-like crest?) to the bizarre and oh-so-luvvie
corset and bustle (should have been either far more plumage or none
at all, I say). After a while I found myself gritting my teeth every
time parrot-Thorpe muscled in on yet another beautifully delivered
performance by the rest of the main cast. Minus a lot of points for
the parrot.

Those are the cavils; now for the kudos. Starting with OHH EMM GEE
GARY CARR AS MAU IS AWESOME, NOT TO MENTION HEART-STOPPINGLY
GORGEOUS IN A LOINCLOTH. I can no longer say how much Carr's Mau was
like or unlike the Mau I pictured when reading Nation, because the
sheer strength of his performance, both physical and vocal, rapidly
became *the* Mau for me, taking over any former images in my mind.
Even at the start, during the (unavoidable, I suppose) infodump
monologue on Boys' Island, he conveyed a sincerity and determination
that matched that of the novel's opening scenes, and as the play
progressed he showed -- he *lived* -- Mau's personal evolution,
making me feel the boy's fear and courage and seamlessly portraying
Mau's transition from beleaguered adolescent to confident chief.
Suffice it to say he made me cry in all the right places.

Emily Taaffe as Daphne was similarly excellent. Dare I say it, her
performance gave me an even stronger impression of how much Daphne
had 'gone native' during the course of the story, and I see this as
a plus. The physical chemistry between Daphne and Mau was superb
(and it seemed obvious in behind-the-scenes footage that the actors
were very comfortable in each other's company), and their comic
*and* dramatic timing flawless. I was wondering if the scene in
Locaha's domain would work on stage, but Taaffe put it across
superbly.

The supporting cast, apart from parrot-Thorpe, were all first-rate.
My favourites were Gaye Brown (Daphne's insufferable grandmother),
who steamed through her lines in best Patricia Routledge 'Hyacinth'
mode; Nicholas Rowe, who played Daphne's father effectively as what
I later described as 'Eric Idle's bemused younger brother'; Ewart
James Walters, a powerful presence as Ataba the priest; and Lorna
Gayle, whose character is listed as Marisgala but who I presume was
Mrs Gurgle. Cox (Paul Chahidi) was a bit of a stock Mummerset
character, but that was appropriate for the part; Polegrave (Al
Nedjari) and Foxlip (Michael Mears) owed a lot to the comic-relief
baddies Pintel and Ragetti from the Pirates of the Caribbean films
-- in other words, more slapstick than genuinely menacing -- but as
I adore Pintel and Ragetti, I have no complaints about that!

Now then, the character and story changes made in the stage
adaptation. I tend to curl my lip at such practices in film and
telly adaptations because I find they usually take away from the
source material without improving the adaptation, but in the case of
Nation I think the changes worked well to bridge the gap between the
epic story of the novel and the necessarily truncated stage
production. Cox was reinvented as Daphne's family butler-cum-
personal manservant, who had accompanied her on the Sweet Judy as
protector/chaperone; in the play, Cox had been a loyal and loving
retainer who had lost his own beloved son to the pandemic and whose
grief, combined with the horror of the voyage and washing up on a
beach only to be captured by the cannibal Raiders, unhinged him.
Where Cox in the novel was simply an evil man, Cox in the play was a
good man turned by circumstance into a nihilistic madman. I found
this to be logical and acceptable, and found that stage-Cox's
connection to Daphne strengthened his presence in the adapted story.

Another logical change that worked well was in the character of Mrs
Gurgle, who was portrayed by Gayle as a robust, no-nonsense earth-
mother priestess at the height of her physical and mental powers -
far more effective on the stage than the character would have been
if they'd followed the novel's description. Similarly, reinventing
Cahle (Sirine Saba) as a chatty survivor, who interacted closely
with Daphne and helped her to assimilate, was a wise move in the
context of the adaptation.

To go back to my claim at the start: no, I don't think Nation-the-
novel can be truly portrayed on the stage, at least not in the form
of a two-hour play. To get the full impact across, I believe one
would have to take the Wagnerian grand opera approach and create a
production that lasted over the course of a week. But as no-one goes
in for that sort of thing these days, the National Theatre's
production of Nation is well worth watching and will send you away
genuinely moved.


5.2 THE AUTHOR ON THE PLAY

Pterry talks to BBC World Service programme The Strand about
Nation and its adaptation for the stage:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p005x3xf


5.3 REVIEW IN THE GLOBE AND MAIL (Canada)

"Do children in this Avatar age expect to be greeted with ever-
wilder special effects when they visit the cinema? It's worth
thinking about if you take your kids to see Nation. The play, based
on a novel by Terry Pratchett and currently playing at the National
Theatre in London... Some of the effects in Nation are dazzling in
the confines of a darkened theatre -- a tiny boat tossed on a
cellophane sea, life-sized vulture puppets that feast on a corpse's
ropy cloth entrails -- but they may lose their magic when projected
on the screen in a movie house... If you take your kids and they
drag their feet, tell them it's live performance -- the original
3-D."

http://tinyurl.com/ycs46ms


5.4 REVIEW IN TONIGHT (South Africa)

A review by a journalist who knows Nation in its original novel
form:

"Milton (Thorpe) the foul-mouthed parrot is such a delightful
Pratchett conceit, but having read the book I miss the absolute
nihilism of some of the characters as well as the bitter railing
against loss and the questioning of the existence of God, which
formed such as central part of Mau's character..."

http://tinyurl.com/ydc77sh

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

06) PTERRY'S DIMBLEBY LECTURE: "SHAKING HANDS WITH DEATH"

Sir Terry Pratchett recently gave the prestigious Dimbleby Lecture
for 2010, which was broadcast on the BBC. The title was "Shaking
Hands with Death" and the subject was a plea to change the "assisted
dying" laws in the UK. The lecture was delivered by the actor Tony
Robinson after an introduction by the author. Although some British
institutions and individuals consider this subject controversial, it
is notable that up to 80% of Britons agree with Sir Terry. The
author may not have ever imagined he would be the unofficial
spokesperson for "assisted dying", but none doubt his passion and
eloquence.

"Sir Terry wants to see measures put in place to ensure that anyone
seeking to commit suicide was of sound mind and not being influenced
by others. 'At the moment if someone assists someone else to commit
suicide in this country or elsewhere they become suspect to murder
until the police decide otherwise,' he told the BBC. 'I think it
would be rather better if a person wishes to die, they could go see
the tribunal with friends and relatives and present their case - at
least if it happens, it happens with, as it were, authority... It
seems sensible to me that we should look to the medical profession,
that over the centuries has helped us to live longer and healthier
lives, to help us die peacefully among our loved ones in our own
home without a long stay in God's waiting room,' Sir Terry said."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/8490062.stm


Some extracts from the lecture, in The Independent:

"If we are are to live in a world where a socially acceptable 'early
death' can be allowed, it must be allowed as a result of careful
consideration. Let us consider me as a test case. As I have said, I
would like to die peacefully with Thomas Tallis on my iPod before
Alzheimer's disease takes me over and I hope that will not be for
quite some time to come, because if I knew that I could die at any
time I wanted, then suddenly every day would be as precious as a
million pounds. If I knew that I could die, I would live. My life,
my death, my choice... Observation, conversation and some careful
deduction lead me to believe that the majority of doctors who
support the right to die are those who are most closely involved
day-to-day with patients.."

http://tinyurl.com/y877jep (page includes video)


More transcripts from the lecture, in The Guardian:

http://tinyurl.com/yd2mn4g


The Guardian's leading editorial:

"A patron of the Alzheimer's Research Trust, and a significant
donor, Sir Terry has become a formidable champion of the rights of
fellow sufferers, challenging Nice for the guidance it has issued
over the drug Aricept. If sufferers from incurable diseases could
chose the time of their death, then each remaining day of their life
would be precious to them, he argues. Sir Terry enriches a complex
debate with a unique brand of honesty, ­bravery and humour..."

http://tinyurl.com/ylyuq9y


An article in the Sydney Morning Herald (Australia):

"Pratchett presented his argument for assisted suicide last week,
while delivering a lecture for the BBC, saying: 'I would like to die
peacefully before the disease takes me over. If I knew that I could
die at any time I wanted then suddenly every day would be as
precious as a million pounds. If I knew that I could die, I would
live. My life, my death, my choice.' They were dignified, considered
words. Even so, Pratchett expected all hell to break loose. To his
surprise, it didn't. 'Some archbishops have said nasty things but I
look on that as a plus,' he says, lucidly and softly. 'Apart from
that, not a single person has thumbed their nose at me. People are
saying, "How can we join in?" The baby boomers see how their
grandmothers and grandfathers died, and they're looking after their
mums and dads, and they think, "Bugger this, who said it has to be
like this?"'..."

(includes an excellent photograph)

http://tinyurl.com/yeze3zh


A former colleague of Pterry's at the Bucks Free Press applauds his
stand:

"If I remember rightly, he came up with his fantasy worlds while
standing in for the kids' corner editor. It was not something I
recall discussing, so I don't know whether he came to share my
disbelief in the world about which the religious believers in the
supernatural fantasise. However, I share his view that, when life in
this world becomes intolerable, someone whom I might ask to help me
quit it should not be penalised for doing so..."

http://tinyurl.com/ydnrpj9

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 2 -- continued on Part 3 of 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- FEBRUARY 2010 -- PART 3 OF 5 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 3 -- MORE NEWS, MORE REVIEWS

07) GUILD OF SEAMSTRESSES CREST BADGE NOW AVAILABLE
08) PTERRY AND ALZHEIMER'S NEWS
09) REVIEW: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS AUDIO BOOK
10) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
11) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS STILL GOING STRONG
12) CONVENTION NEWS
13) ACTION REPLAY: PTERRY'S BLOOPER REEL
14) NEW FOLKLORE MUSEUM AND RESOURCE
15) ODDITIES OF NOTE
16) IMAGE OF THE MONTH
17) HOW TO READ IN THE BATH
18) "NATION" MELMEET REPORT AND REVIEW

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

07) PJSM PRINTS PRESENTS: GUILD OF SEAMSTRESSES CREST BADGE

As mentioned by Sir Pterry! PJSM Prints says:

"For the Valentines Season, we are releasing the Guild of
Seamstresses Crest as part of the continuing Ankh-Morpork
Collection. Remember.... never underestimate the Guild of
Seamstresses, and those who wear their badge."

The pin badges are £29.99 each, available in a limited edition of
only 200. They became available on the 18th of February, so hurry!

http://www.pjsmprints.com/pins/index.html

Also, Sandra Kidby recommends the new 41 X 31cm Seamstresses' Guild
bag:

"A superb quality black urban messenger bag with gold text. Complete
with padded adjustable shoulder strap and internal organiser
section." The bags are priced at £20.00 each.

http://www.pjsmprints.com/bags/

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

08) PTERRY AND ALZHEIMER'S NEWS

8.1 The author on living with Alzheimer's:

A page of audio and video links:
http://www.tinyurl.com.au/25h


8.2 The Alzheimer's Research Trust Memory Wall is touring Britain:

"Discworld author Sir Terry Pratchett... wrote: 'The day my daughter
was born. The elation -- nothing could've gone wrong that night. I'd
hate to lose that memory.' ... The wall will be launched in
Cambridge and will be displayed in the Grand Arcade from February 6.
It will then travel around the UK..."

http://tinyurl.com/ygzyh48

More information can be found at http://www.memories-matter.org/


8.3 In the Guardian, a doctor calls for far more research and
training:

"There is ­currently no effective treatment for ­dementia. We need
to put ­serious money -- billions -- into research.
­Psychogeriatrics is the twilight zone of medicine. ­Medical
students want to be cardiologists and surgeons, not ­geriatricians.
If the ­government funded a hundred psychiatric registrars to do an
MD in ­dementia each year, our knowledge would ­improve and more
bright young doctors would be attracted... Sir Terry Pratchett has
courageously talked about his dementia and that helps. But, for Sir
Terry, there is money to fund nursing care. For most, there is
not..."

http://tinyurl.com/yhm5299


8.4 Pterry on the BBC's The One Show recently:

"Since being diagnosed by specialists at Addenbrooke's Hospital in
December 2007, Sir Terry Pratchett summed up his life, saying: 'It's
been busy...And I've been doing lots of work for various
campaigns... and I feel good... I don't put my trousers on upside
down or things like that and I can get myself dressed - but I'm
always aware of this little problem that I'm overcoming. You work
around as much as you can. You'll never see me go into a revolving
door...' He laughed again and added: 'But it would be fun!'..."

http://tinyurl.com/yfpws8o


8.5 Alzheimer's informative advertising on television:

"Dementia charity, The Alzheimer's Research Trust (ART), is
launching its first TV fundraising campaign to boost support and
donations to the charity. This campaign, created by Domain, features
two 60-second executions designed to encourage people..."

"Two adverts are being shown; one featuring a scientist researching
the disease in order to discover new treatments, and the other an
emotional appeal from a woman who describes how she lost her husband
two years ago - her husband sits next to her staring vacantly into
space, physically alive yet no longer aware of who or where he is."

from http://www.mad.co.uk and http://tinyurl.com/yfpws8o

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

09) REVIEW: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS AUDIO BOOK

"It's not easy to track the multitude of characters, but Stephen
Briggs gives each of them a distinctive voice. Briggs has been
adapting Pratchett's novels to the stage since 1991, and the
recurring characters are his to command. His performance brings out
the best of the satirical humor and Pratchett's really good bad
puns..."

(Harper Audio, unabridged, 12 CDs, 14.5 hrs, $39.99 ISBN
978-0-06-186829-0)

http://tinyurl.com/ycmltd3

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

10) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS

10.1 WYRD SISTERS IN OSCEOLA

The Osceola Community Theatre, Indiana, USA is currently presenting
their production of Wyrd Sisters.

Dates: February 26th and 27th at 7pm and February 21st and 28th at
1pm (Sunday Matinee shows)
Where: 311 S Apple Rd, Osceola, Indiana

For more details and ticket information please visit
http://www.osceolatheatre.com

10.2 CARPE JUGULUM IN GLASTONBURY

Straight From the Heart Productions will present Carpe Jugulum at
the Glastonbury Assembly Rooms in April.

Where: Glastonbury Assembly Rooms, High Street, Glastonbury BA6 9DU
When: April 14-17, 2010.
Time: Doors open at 7:30pm, 8pm start.
Tickets: available from Gothic Image, Glastonbury, or email
ANICECUPOFTEAANDBISCUITS@....

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

11) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS STILL GOING STRONG

After two months at the top of the Locus bestsellers list, Unseen
Academicals has dropped -- but only to second place.

http://www.locusmag.com/Magazine/2010/Issue02_Bestsellers.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

12) CONVENTION NEWS

12.1 NULLAS ANXIETAS III

Memorandum
From: Lord Vetinari, The Oblong Office, Ankh Morpork
Subject: The Australian Discworld Convention 2011 - dates 8th to
10th April 2011

As part of our Ankh Morpork Cultural Outreach Initiative, I have
commissioned the Nullus Anxietas 3 committee to organise an exciting
3 day convention to promote the culture and history of our
Discworld, and in particular the many attractions and commercial
opportunities awaiting them in Ankh Morpork.

The convention will run from 8th to 10th April 2011 at the Penrith
Panthers Convention Centre, Mulgoa Road, Penrith, NSW.

The committee assure me that it will include old favourites such as
Wossnames, the Great Debate, Werewolf and Terry's shorts on the
programme, a host of talks and workshops on all things Discworld and
with lots of new events such as Scumble tasting, the Great hedgehog
race, Discworld card making, a masquerade parade and fan art being
introduced for the first time. This will be your chance to dress up
as real Discworld people and meet other Discworld fans.

They have chosen Panthers because it offers some excellent
convention facilities, has a hotel next door and there is a wealth
of good food on the site. (Some of it not involving rat!) Penrith
itself is on the western edge of Sydney, at the foot of the Blue
Mountains, and is a good centre both for those flying in to Sydney
and those travelling from within NSW.

Convention prices are (AU$):

Early bird full membership $120 rising to $150
Early bird concessionary membership $100 rising to $125
Early bird child membership $60 rising to $75
Supporting membership $30

Sir Terry has got our Convention in his diary and has said he will
attend health permitting ...

Other special guests will be announced closer to the time.

If you would like to help publicise this event in your local area
please contact Granny Weatherwax at publicity@...

If you would like to volunteer to assist with events at the
convention please contact Tania at enquiries@...

Don't forget to follow us on Twitter via @NullusAnxietas3, and join
our Facebook group Nullus Anxietas in New South Wales and the
Australian Discworld Convention page.

I understand that Nullus Anxietas translates as "No Worries",
although the committee will have plenty to worry about if they let
any mimes through the door!

Finally, get the latest news on Nullus Anxietas 3 at
http://ausdwcon.org/


NA III Organiser Granny Weatherwax adds: BTW, Wossname on our
programme event is a Discworld version of a game show called
Blankety Blanks.


12.2 DWCON 2010

The 2010 Discworld Convention will take place from 27th-30th
August 2010 at the Hilton Birmingham Metropole Hotel.

For more information and news, go to:

http://www.dwcon.org/

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

13) ACTION REPLAY

A little gem from YouTube! Outtakes from Pterry's advertisement for
terrypratchettbooks:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MFwLjSDCxuM&feature=related

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

14) IN SEARCH OF NARRATIVE CAUSALITY

The Sussex Centre for Folklore, Fairy Tales and Fantasy opens this
month:

"The centre seeks to explore, discuss and celebrate the folktales,
fairy tales and fantastic imagination from across the world that has
led to bestselling fantasy works by writers as diverse as JRR
Tolkien, Terry Pratchett, JK Rowling, Angela Carter, Philip Pullman
and CS Lewis...."

http://tinyurl.com/ych3qj7

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

15) ODDITIES OF NOTE: SLICING TIME, AND IS PTERRY AN ALIEN?

A short video that may remind you of Lobsang Ludd:
http://www.boingboing.net/2010/02/08/nuit-blanche.html

Link courtesy of Mrs Cake of Bugarup University

Another short video, amusing. Several of the "students" at BU think
Pterry is moonlighting as an alien:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaFZTAOb7IE

Link courtesy of the peripatetic Asti

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

16) IMAGE OF THE MONTH: THE (NAMED) MEAT OF THE TURTLE

Great A'Tuin might be wondering where the hatchlings went:

http://tinyurl.com/ygpdcvn

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

17) HOW TO READ IN THE BATH

Take some Discworld books in with you, for a start, according to the
Daily TWiP. "There are many simple pleasures in life, but very few
holidays that give you license to celebrate more than one at a time.
Read in the Bathtub Day lets you enjoy a good book, a hot bath, and
a little bit of peace and quiet all at the same time... Pratchett
satirizes everything from China's Cultural Revolution to Andrew
Lloyd Webber musicals to Death itself (or should we say, himself).
You'll enjoy what you're reading and maybe even learn something,
too..."

http://tinyurl.com/ye3dsax

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

18) "NATION" MELMEET AND REVIEW

by Mogg

On Saturday the 13th of February 2010, several members of Bugarup
University (aka ozdw@yahoogroups.com) met up in Melbourne, Fourecks
to see the screening of Nation at the Nova Cinema in Carlton.

Attendees: me (Mogg, the Ticket Purchaser), SteVen, Mrs Peculiar,
Paul the Libwolf, B and her fiance, and Sacharissa, a friend of most
of those attending but not an ozdw member.

Non-attendee: Jase, who ultimately found that he couldn't be in
multiple places at once and chose to be somewhere else (boo!)

As the person responsible for purchasing and bringing the tickets,
it was of course essential that I be at the Nova in Carlton in good
time for the screening. Consequently, I ran screamingly late and
became mired in traffic as bad as any weekday rush (shouldn't you
all have been at home gardening or something???!!!). Others were
more sensible than I, and met earlier for lunch. I fortunately know
the area quite well and knew where I could park near the cinema with
a minimum of time wasted, and so I arrived at approximately two
minutes to screening time, out of breath, and frantically waved the
ticket receipt at the cinema staff so that they would let us in.

After unsuccessfully attempting to purchase some water from the girl
in the upstairs cafe who was on the phone and couldn't, apparently,
say either "can you hold for a moment, I have a customer" or "I'm
sorry, I'll be with you in a minute", we settled into our assigned
seats in one of the larger of the Nova's theatres. With perhaps 100
people in the audience, the room was a little over half full. I was
a little disappointed that there wasn't a larger crowd than that,
but at least we weren't in the mini-theatre! We explained to someone
(I mention no names) that the girl walking around and calling out
"Prices!" was in fact saying "Precis!" and was distributing a
summary of the play, not cinema brochures.

The broadcast started with an overview of other productions by the
National Theatre and an interview with Nation director Melly Still,
conducted, rather fascinatingly, outdoors on what was obviously a
cold London day. I found I spent more time looking at the background
of the Thames and London than I did listening to the interview,
which was probably not the idea, but as someone who normally only
sees photos or television footage of London in unusual
circumstances, it was quite nice seeing and hearing it as a living
city with cranes and traffic and an inconveniently noisy helicopter
in the background.

And so to the production itself. I'm not much of a theatre-goer, and
I was a trifle sceptical that a book as dense with concepts as
Nation could be successfully translated to the stage. As it started,
I distinctly remember thinking "I hope this isn't a huge
disappointment." Fortunately, it was quite the opposite.

First to the practical aspects -- the staging was generally very
good, with most of the action taking place on a kind of upturned
giant wok with an embossed map of the Great Southern Pelagic Ocean,
which to me effectively represented the island of the Nation without
having to have lots of extra props. I particularly liked the water
scenes projected or shadowed on the screens at the rear of the
stage, but didn't like the design of the statues and carvings in the
Grandfather's Cave, which were rather too caveman-like when they
were supposed to be representing an highly advanced and
sophisticated culture.

(report and review continued in Part 4)

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 3 -- continued on Part 4 of 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- FEBRUARY 2010 -- PART 4 OF 5 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 4 -- MORE REVIEWS, AND HOROSCOPE

19) "NATION" MELMEET REPORT AND REVIEW, CONTINUED
20) NATION (NOVEL) REVIEW
21) NT'S NATION: LOVED IN BOSTON
22) EBOOK WARS: KOBO JOINS IN
23) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

19) "NATION" MELMEET REPORT AND REVIEW, CONTINUED

I was a bit dubious about the use of puppetry, but in the end most
of that was also excellent. I thought the puppet pig and baby
Twinkle were fabulous, and while I didn't like the design of the
grandfather birds, which looked and behaved like skeletal vultures
rather than as they were described in the book, the puppetry was
still good, with the remarkable effect of being able to disguise
quite well the fact that the bird puppets required two people to
control them.

Some of the characters were combined or altered to make the story
more suitable for the stage format, and in general this worked very
well. Giving Cox a reason for becoming what he did, leaving out
Cahle's mental disturbance, and making Mrs. Gurgle (renamed
Marisgala) into a kind of wise woman made for more coherence in the
limited time, and making Ataba the priest a somewhat less stubbornly
reactionary character also made sense given the downplaying of the
anti-tradition/religion theme. The cast was very strong, without any
notable let-downs (but see below), but Mau and Daphne were
outstanding. The music and singing fitted in seamlessly, and gave
the impression of being the natural expression of the people at
times of celebration, not as implausible intrusions in the story.

My biggest complaint was, in fact, one of the things that other
reports have generally praised most about Nation. That was Milton
the parrot. As far as I know, everyone in the group found Milton not
as good as reported. For me, I think the main problem was his
costume. I found that because he looked like a man wearing a South
Pacific bustle rather than something that was at least vaguely bird-
like, I had to keep reminding myself that he was a parrot in order
to not be taken aback by his character. His lines were perfectly
fine as interruptions from a clever parrot, but not from a person,
and his demeanour wasn't sufficiently bird-like to consistently
maintain the right impression in my mind given the lack in
costuming. That's not to say that he didn't have some great moments,
but personally my Suspenders of Disbelief(TM) were strained by
having to do a lot of work which could have been easily avoided.
Even something in the costume to suggest wings would have helped a
lot. Also, Jason Thorpe, the actor who played Milton, looked like a
friend of mine who actually does have a red mohawk that looks more
parrot-like that Jason Thorpe managed to, and that was a tiny bit
weird!

Now to the ideas in the story. I don't think a stage production
could ever take in the full scope of the story of Nation,
particularly the theme of questioning tradition and religion that is
so strong in the book and was really only lightly touched on in the
play. Some might argue that the discussion of religion or the losing
of religion is one of the main themes of Nation the book, and
downplaying it was disappointing. I personally really can't see how
anyone could have produced an engaging, coherent story in the form
of a play which included that as a major theme while also including
the supernatural elements of the scenes with Locaha. There just
isn't enough time to cram that much information into the format, and
as the Locaha scenes carry Mau's story on and are more suited to
portraying in a visually engaging way, it's much easier to retain
them. You might be able to include more with a film version as there
is less restriction, but not in a play -- there's just too much
complicated information there. In the book, there can be a balance
of the ambiguity of Mau rejecting the gods whilst still having
experiences that feel "spiritual", but a book has the advantage of
being able to discuss concepts and let the reader draw the pictures
with their mind. A play must show and tell in a limited time and
with limited resources, in a way that must be visually engaging -- a
method which is a much less efficient way of portraying large and
complicated ideas.

Overall, I really enjoyed the play. I laughed, I cried, I was
(mostly) fully swept into the story. Staging Nation was a pretty big
task, and I think the National Theatre have done very close to as
good a job as is possible. But though I can't say for sure due to my
own familiarity with the book, I think it possible that there is
still so much information in the current version of Nation the Play
that people unfamiliar with the story may find it a little bit hard
to follow. Oh yes, and I think the camera work was very good, and
probably made things better than being in the actual theatre in some
ways. Just imagine how much harder it would have been to understand
Milton was a bird if you were at the back of the theatre trying to
see what was going on!

The production included an interval, which was rather nice. It meant
I got to have my (very overpriced) water, and there was some
interesting additional material like the winning entries in a
competition for school-age children to create film productions of
the tea-party scene from the book of Nation, and Gary Carr (Mau) and
Emily Taaffe (Daphne) visiting the Museum and seeing items such as a
scale model of Darwin's Beagle and the earliest known dictionary and
translation of a South Pacific language. It turns out that "Mau"
means "shark", which is rather satisfying -- another little example
of Pterry Knowing Lots of Stuff, or at least making good use of good
research.

After Nation finished, we adjourned to Brown's for cake and coffee,
but didn't get to spend a lot of time due to one person having to
leave to catch a train, one person having to go to a party, and one
person needing a lift to the nearest emergency department after
deciding that the hand that they had slammed into a doorknob before
the movie really needed to be x-rayed, what with the swelling and
all. We therefore went our separate ways, in my case highly
satisfied with the play. I'm pleased to report that the injured
hand proved to have a ligament strain but no broken bones, but we
didn't find that out until some seven hours later. All in all, a
very good day out.

-- Mogg


Also, some additional thoughts from attendee Sacharissa:

Having re-read the book since, I think that the adaptation of Cox
potentially weakened one of Sir Pterry's major themes in Nation-the-
novel. Namely, that people who turn their backs on (the) God(s) are
not inherently evil, and that people who are atheists can be Good
People, and that people who worship deities can in fact sometimes be
horrifically evil, but can also be Good People, and that -- on the
whole -- people are just people, but sometimes they enjoy hurting
everyone else.

By making Cox someone who had turned his back on God and become
nihilistic, that really undid a lot of the strength conveyed by
Mau's angry repudiation of the Pelagic gods.

That being said, I do like that Daphne's trial was left unresolved
in the play -- I like that the adapters left it up to the audience
to decide whether Daphne's actions were Right, Wrong, or Wrong-But-
Justified (personally, I think the last). And I liked the merging of
Cahle with Unknown/Papervine Woman, although it did basically mean
that Papervine Woman's role (unable to feed baby) was completely
subsumed by Cahle and her baby.


%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

20) NATION (NOVEL) REVIEW

In the Winston-Salem Journal, a review of Nation by Steve
Wishnevsky:

"There are heroes, villains, mutineers, cannibal head hunters, a
rescue mission, lost civilizations and god anchors, all of which
require poor Mau to actually think for himself, a process he finds
as uncomfortable as the rest of us do... Pratchett's genius -- and I
think him the equal of Twain -- is to walk the razor's edge between
plausible fantasy and irrational reality, indicating amusing points
of interest, unusual spectacles, sprightly follies and noble
edifices along the way. His characters, even the bit players, have
length, breadth, thickness and duration, as well as quaint
vocabularies and obscure motivations of their very own..."

http://tinyurl.com/ybz5o4m

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

21) NT'S NATION: LOVED IN BOSTON

Unlike some critics, Ty Burr of The Boston Globe (USA) was
unequivocally delighted by the NT's cinecast of Nation:

"In a word: Tremendous. Based on a Terry Pratchett novel about a
British girl and a South Seas Islander boy marooned on an island and
slowly building a new civilization, it has been adapted by Mark
Ravenhill and directed by Melly Still with a subtle but epic
intelligence that allows Pratchett's plea for enlightened
rationalism to shine through. The production uses elements of
choreography, puppetry, and masque but well within the context of
the tale... The performances help "Nation'' forge a genuine
emotional connection with the audience, even one sitting 3,325 miles
away..."

http://tinyurl.com/y8tlmdn

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

22) EBOOK WARS: KOBO JOINS IN

"Kobo has launched its cloud-based e-book service in the UK allowing
anywhere access to recent bestsellers and free classics. The
service, which was previously restricted to the US, is now open for
business in the UK... Because the service is cloud based, you can
shuttle between devices and carry on reading where you finished last
time as the software keeps your books in sync across multiple
platforms. Books come in either PDF or ePub formats and are priced
at up to 31 per cent off of the RRP according to Kobo. There seem to
be some pricing inconsistencies, however. Terry Pratchett's latest
Unseen Academicals is given a list price of £22.31. Kobo is
flogging it for £8.99 which it says is 60 per cent off of the list
price. But Amazon lists the hardback version of the book at £18.99
and sells it for £9.49..."

http://tinyurl.com/ye4cb65

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

23) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

by Fernando Magnifico

Hallo and buongiorno my magnificent friends! The Lady Asterisk is
not available, for she has come down with weasels, but do not be
concerned, for Fernando shall be your astrologer today!

My friends, unlike some astrologers who only ever tell you the good
news, Fernando does not compromise and will always be completely
honest with you, even when it means telling you the messages which
are perhaps not so much to your liking. And so it is with this
month, for Fernando has consulted the stars to report what food you
are most alike.

Fernando knows that his readers are the cream of the cream, or as
the Quirmians say for some reason, the creme de la creme, who will
have no problem with facing their own weaknesses, unlike those who
read the *other* astrologers, who say only the things which flatter
the reader. This is necessary, for Fernando knows that all foods are
good in their own way, even the Ankh-Morpork sausage-inna-bun, but
they all have the weaknesses as well as the strengths. Just as you
would not put the wow-wow sauce on fresh strawberries, or serve
pickled cabbage with pasta (unless you are from BhangBhangDuc), so
all signs have their good and bad combinations. And just as it is so
for the food, the goodness and badness of the combination is
according to taste, so do not worry my friends, what the stars say
here is not so much the rule as just a guideline. If wow-wow sauce
on the strawberries works for you, who is Fernando to say that you
shouldn't do it?

Ciao bella!

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Adamant Hedgehog  21 Mar - 20 Apr

According to the stars, who know these things (you can trust
Fernando on this), the fruit that Hoggers are most alike is the
Wahoonie: big, spiky, tasting of earwax and sometimes smelling
faintly of Foul Ole Ron. But the wahoonie is also prized by the
connoisseurs (excuse Fernando's Quirmian) of fine, exotic, or merely
expensive foods. Like the Hogger, you will never forget your first
Wahoonie, not even with therapy. It is the difficult fruit, and the
Adamant Hedgehog is a difficult sign, but those who can handle it
will win the admiration and wonder of their friends. Hoggers, you
are best suited in small quantities, and you are best suited for
Spooners.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Half-Eaten Sandwich  21 Apr - 21 May

My friends, the stars say that Sandies are like garlic, the queen of
vegetables! Fernando, like all Brindisians, was weaned from his
sainted mamma's milk onto the garlic. (That is to say, Fernando was
weaned onto the garlic, like all Brindisians, and not that all
Brindisians were weaned off Fernando's sainted mamma. Morporkian is
the molto difficile language sometimes!) It was a terrible shock for
Fernando to come to Ankh-Morpork where garlic is used to frighten
the vampires and not for the cooking. My friends, when making sauce
for the pasta, you must listen to Fernando's Aunt Maria who says
that the right amount of garlic for any dish is always "more".
Garlic is like the queens: strong, rich, and you always know when
they are in the room. Garlic is good for the muscles, the liver, the
heart, the man bits and the lady bits, and it cures what ails you.
Like garlic, the Sandies sometimes have trouble making friends, and
you are best suited for Staffies and Andies.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 4 -- continued on Part 5 of 5.
If you did not get all  parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- FEBRUARY 2010 -- PART 5 OF 5 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 5 -- HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED, AND CLOSE

24) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE,  MAY > MARCH
25) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo


24) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE  MAY > MARCH


Herne the Hunted  22 May - 21 Jun

Hernians, the stars tell Fernando that your food is the chocolate.
But not the cheap kind, made with the floor sweepings and tallow
like you get at Dibbler's Sweet Emporium ("93% rat-dropping free"),
but the molto expensive kind like the ones made by Wienrich and
Boettcher on Zephire Street, made from actual cocoa and no sawdust
at all. Like these chocolates, Hernians have the good taste, which
is perhaps why Herne is the god of small things destined to be
eaten. Just as you would not wish to live on nothing but chocolate,
so a little Hernian goes a long way. You are best suited as the
small treat at the end of the meal, and good with any sign at all.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Wizard's Staff and Knob  22 Jun - 22 Jul

Fernando knows that the Staffies are red-blooded people, with the
large appetites. Staffies, your food is the red meat: simple, solid
food, for uncomplicated, solid people. Whenever you are brought to
the table, you are the centre of attention, but sometimes you can be
tough and chewy to deal with, but pounding with the heavy mallet can
often made all the difference. Beware though that too much of the
red meat can make the bottom burps which clear out a room in
seconds, rather like an angry Staffie in full eruption or Fernando's
cousin Ramon. You are best suited for Sandies and, surprisingly,
Boring'uns. Fernando does not understand this, but the stars never
lie!

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Bilious, God of Hangovers  23 Jul - 23 Aug

Fernando is very adventurous and is always very keen to try the new
experiences, so when Fernando first came to Ankh-Morpork and a
Morporkian native asked "do you want a knuckle sandwich, pal",
Fernando said yes. This is a mistake you only make once, trust me on
this for it is so. But Fernando has since learned that the knuckle
sandwich is also a food, made from the bread and pigs knuckles. How
many amusing jokes this must lead to! Bilians, when you have not
been drinking, you are like the knuckle sandwich: straightforward,
down-home and comfortable, very like what they call "tucker" in
Fourecks or what we call in Brindisi "peasant food" (only we say it
in Brindisian, where it is the much more bellissima). But when you
have been hitting the vino or, may the Gods protect us all but
especially your stomach, the scumble, you are more like the *other*
knuckle sandwich. Bilians, you go best with a glass of ale, or
perhaps the Gazundians.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Celestial Parsnip  24 Aug - 23 Sept

My friends, you might think that the parsnip is the food of those
born under the sign of the Celestial Parsnip, but this is not so!
Snippies are the favoured sign of the Fools, clowns and jesters, at
least until Great A'Tuin swings around again, and the foods you are
most like are the custard tarts and cream pies: you are sweet and
rich, often found on people's heads or down their trousers, but you
wouldn't be the centre of the meal (except perhaps for the birthday
parties for the small childrens). When you are not joking around you
are best taken with coffee or tea, and you are best suited for
Gazundians and sometimes the Hokians.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Small Boring Group of Faint Stars  24 Sept - 23 Oct

My friends, Fernando had a lot of trouble casting the horoscope for
this sign, for Great A'Tuin's flipper obscured the necessary stars
for nearly eight days. Fernando was afeared that he would have to
admit defeat, for unlike some other astrologers Fernando would never
stoop to *making things up* when the stars cannot be seen. But at
the last minute, Great A'Tuin twitched (you may have felt the Disc
move) and Fernando could make his horoscope! Boring'uns, the stars
say that you are like the lettuce: plain and boring, without the
exciting flavour of cabbage or the potatoes with their many
interesting ways of preparation. But this is molto bene, because not
everyone can be like the exciting chilli peppers or the strong
Lancre Blue cheese, and Fernando knows that sometimes a nice, quiet
salad is refreshing. You are best suited for other Boring'uns, but
also to Staffies and Andies, much to everyone's surprise. Especially
other Boring'uns.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Androgyna Majestis  24 Oct - 22 Nov

My cara Andies, you are known for taking your pleasure where you
find it and for being easily impressed, so you will not be surprised
when I tell you that the stars say you are most like the cucumbers.
For many people the cucumber is a confusing vegetable because
cucumbers are thought to be a strange and worrying delicacy found
only in the fiercely guarded harems of Klatchian kings or Agatean
emperors, but Fernando can assure you that they are also found in
the gardens of the commonest farmers and go well with any sort of
meal. You are also like the carrots and the parsnips, which are very
robust, pointed at one end, and suitable for many sorts of creative
uses. Andies, you are most suited to the Munchers.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Spoons, a.k.a. the Greater and Lesser Spoons,  23 Nov - 21 Dec

Spooners, the stars tell Fernando that you are most like the
banananananas and other fishies, particularly served in the Agatean
fashion, raw, or as they call it, squishi. The fishies are good for
the brain, and the fishy oil is good for making sure you are regular
and completely clean on the inside, if you know my meaning.
(Although it is Fernando's duty to warn his readers that CMOT
Dibbler's Finest Cod Liver Oil is *espeziale* fishy. Fernando is
sure the cod liver oil should not be blue.) Banananananas especially
are the molto versatile fishy, useful in cake, roasted, boiled,
sliced on porridge, or just eaten on their own. Fernando knows that
the Creator is the very kind, for the bananananana is perfectly
shaped for the hand, it comes in its own protective packaging, and
the skin makes for hours of entertainment for the childrens when
left on the busy street where people are walking. Spooners, you are
best suited for cream, lemon, Umbragians and Gazundians.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Hoki the Jokester  22 Dec - 20 Jan

Hokians, you are most like the boiled sweeties: sweet and sticky,
you bring much pleasure to the small childrens and those giving up
the smoking tobacco, but like the boiled sweeties, too much of you
can be hard to cope with. Fernando knows that this is true for all
people who are not as magnificent as Fernando, but the Hokians
especially have to be careful that you do not "wear out your
welcome", as they say. Fernando does not judge, for you cannot be
blamed for not being Fernando. Just as too much of the sweeties is
bad for the teeth, and will make the small childrens sticky and
rather unpleasant, Hokians too can sometimes be too sweet. You are
best suited for Andies, who Fernando is very pleased to have
learned, like it sticky.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Rather Large Gazunda  21 Jan - 18 Feb

When Fernando was a boy, he remembers an Omnian preacher who came to
Fernando's village. Before he was tied to the back of a donkey and
chased out of the village, the preacher told Fernando the story of
the first two people on the Disc. As Fernando remembers it, Om
created Adamo and Evelyn from the mud, then teased them by dangling
the fruit of the Forbidden Tree just in front of them. When Adamo
and Evelyn took the fruit, Om threw them out of his garden and made
them eat snakes. Fernando tells you this story because it is said by
many that the forbidden fruit was the apple, while it is said by
others that it was the fig, and while the stars are silent on which
it was, they do tell Fernando that Gazundians are most like the figs
and apples! (There are also those who said the story is a mettyfor
for the child growing up to be an adult and learning about the
making love, but they were all killed by the other two groups.)

Gazundians, like the apple, are solid and reliable, good for the
sauce or just as they are. And like the fig, Gazundians can be molto
surprising, for Fernando has learned that the fig is not a fruit at
all, but a ball of many tiny little flowers, turned inside-out so
the flowers are on the inside. There is a tiny little wasp, too
small to see, that crawls inside the fig and makes love to the
flowers inside, or so the wizards have told Fernando. (Fernando
thinks that they need to get out more and perhaps meet the nice
ladies occasionally, because they are getting obsessed with the
animals making the love. Fernando has had enough of that with his
cousin Enrique.) But whatever the fig is, the stars say that
Gazundians are best suited for Snippies and Hoggers.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Lesser Umbrage   19 Feb - 20 Mar

Umbragians, you are most alike the goose liver pate: you are
extravagant, with a rich personality, somewhat greasy, favoured by
the wealthy and the accursed Quirmians (may their cheating
footsballers be eaten by bears) and, Fernando is sad to say,
somewhat cruel to animals. Or at least geese. (Do you think the
goose likes to be stuck in a tiny cage and have food rammed down its
throat until it is bursting? Fernando does not think so.) Like the
pate, Umbragians are wonderful in the small quantities, but too much
is bad for your digestion and will make your hair fall out, like
Fernando's Uncle Sebastian. Umbragians, you get on best with the
small dry biscuits and Spooners.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

25) CLOSE

That brings the February issue to a close. See you next month, same
time, same place. Regular WOSSNAME editor Annie Mac will be back
soon. I hope so, because this is too much like work!

-- A.E. (not Pessimal)

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
MARCH 2010 (Volume 13, Issue 3)
*********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a FREE publication for members of the worldwide
Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North
American Discworld Society and other continental groups. Are you a
member? Yes, if you sent in your name, country and e-mail address.
Are there any dues? No! As a member of the Klatchian Foreign Legion,
you'd only forget them...
*********************************************************************
Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
Editor Emeritus (retd): Joseph Schaumburger
News Editor: Fiona (not Bruce) Bruce
Newshounds: Vera, Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow
Staff Writers: Asti Osborn, Pitt the Elder, Steven D'Aprano
Convention Reporters: Mithtrethth Hania Ogg et al
Staff Technomancer: Jason Parlevliet
Book Reviews: Drusilla D'Afanguin
Puzzle Editor: Tiff
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
DW Horoscope: Lady Anaemia Asterisk, Fernando Magnifico
Emergency Staff: Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare
time)
Copyright 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

------------------------------------------------------------------------

INDEX:

====Part 1 -- ALL THE NEWS THAT FITS

01) QUOTE OF THE MONTH
02) LETTER FROM THE (ACTING) EDITOR
03) UPDATE FROM THE MASTER
04) TELLING STORIES ABOUT MYSTERIOUS ART
05) NATION NEWS AND REVIEWS
06) GOING, GOING...POSTAL!
07) A SHORT HISTORY OF...PTERRY'S BOOK CHOICE
08) PTERRY AND ALZHEIMER'S NEWS
09) SFX READER TOP 25 POLL: LOTS OF PRATCHETT

====Part 2 -- MORE NEWS, REVIEWS AND SUCH

10) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
11) NEW DISCWORLD MINIATURES FROM PJSM PRINTS
12) CONVENTION NEWS
13) NATION REVIEWED BY A HIGH SCHOOL JOURNALIST
14) AUTHOR APPRECIATION: TERRY PRATCHETT
15) PAUL KIDBY INTERVIEW
16) IMAGES OF THE MONTH: LEGO DISCWORLD
17) NEW DISCWORLD FIGURINES
18) LIBRARIANS LOVE THE LIBRARIAN
19) "YOUNG ADULT" LITERATURE, NOW FOR ALL AGES
20) HELP YOUR LOCAL (NOT) LIBRARIAN...

====Part 3 -- BU NEWSROUND, REVIEW, AND HOROSCOPE

21) AROUND THE BU CAMPUS
22) REVIEW: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS
23) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE MAR > AUG

====Part 4 --  HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED, AND CLOSE

24) HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED  AUG > MAR
25) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

01) QUOTE OF THE MONTH

"There's nothing we like better than a good mystery... as we have
no substantial biographical details, and those we do have do not
conform to the image of 'our immortal Bard' Shakespeare, a close
study of the works will reveal the 'real' author. Naturally, they
sculpted conflicting images. Perhaps in 400 years, we'll be
analysing the Discworld novels to discover the 'real' Pratchett."

-- James Shapiro in The Independent, 28 March 2010

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

02) LETTER FROM THE (ACTING) EDITOR

There are few things more divisive among Discworld fans than the
late Josh Kirby's artwork. I know fans who avoided Discworld for
years because they were so put off by the cover art. Lumpy trolls,
misshapen proportions, ugly witches and hideous wizards with
impossibly pointy noses. I think somebody told  Kirby to model the
art on the worst, most clumsily-made Punch and Judy dolls. Which is
a shame, because Kirby was capable of art which was far less gut-
wrenchingly misshapen.

I find Kirby's Discworld work very visually striking, but then so
are the stars you see when somebody punches you in the eye. It
might draw your eye, but it isn't exactly something you want to see
all the time. I don't *dislike* Kirby's Discworld work, although I
know many people who do, but I couldn't imagine myself buying a
graphic novel done in that style.

Personally, I think that Paul Kidby has absolutely nailed the
Discworld. His artwork *is* the Discworld, in my mind. Stephen
Player is also very good: I'm looking at his portrait of Nanny Ogg,
Granny Weatherwax and Magrat Garlick as I write this, and while his
Granny and Nanny aren't precisely the same as I imagined them,
they're excellent. And he has perfectly captured the frizzled-hair,
slightly-worried wet hen look of Magrat. Graham Higgins (illustrator
on the Guards Guards graphic novel) and Melvyn Grant (Where's My
Cow?) are also very good.

They all have different styles. I'd hate to say who is "better",
although I like Kidby's work more.

-- Steven D'Aprano, Acting Editor

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

03) A LETTER FROM THE MASTER

Folks,

The Museum of Curiosity is a half hour Radio 4 panel show hosted by
John Lloyd and Jon Richardson, scheduled for transmission for 6
weeks from Monday 10th May 2010, repeated on Sundays.

Each week they're joined by 3 different guest panellists - a mix
of entertaining experts and expert entertainers.

The first recording is at the Pleasance Theatre, Islington on Monday
8th March from 7.00pm and I shall be the first guest - this has been
known to take up to 2 hours, is rarely less than 1 hour 15 and
they've had no complaints thus far. The recording takes place in
front of a live audience and although we procured an allocation of
seats for my trusty fans, this was allocated in a matter of minutes.

If you were lucky enough to get tickets, please bear in mind the
following;

DO NOT CONTACT US regarding your travel.

DO NOT CONTACT US regarding your accomodations.

DO NOT CONTACT US regarding places to eat.

DO NOT CONTACT US about the search for ultimate beauty and truth.

DO NOT CONTACT US if your name is Dominic Lawson :)

However, best wishes - it should be fun.

(signed) Terry Pratchett

The original message can be viewed at PJSM Prints:
http://www.pjsmprints.com/news/index.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

04) TELLING STORIES ABOUT MYSTERIOUS ART

Terry Pratchett was one of seven top authors asked by the National
Portrait Gallery to create an imaginary backstory for a collection
of 16th and 17th century portraits of unknown subjects.

"There is some light relief in a story fantasy writer Terry
Pratchett creates around a hopeless seafarer called Joshua Easement,
who presents Queen Elizabeth with a 'marvellous and intriguing
animal' from the Americas... Tarnya Cooper, curator of 16th century
collections at the National Portrait Gallery, said the writers had
done something 'incredible'. 'They have looked into a portrait
without knowing anything about it and judged from a gesture, from
costume, from the look in someone's eyes what might be going on in
their lives...'"

http://tinyurl.com/ygzhzv6
http://tinyurl.com/y9ywy9m

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

05) NATION NEWS AND REVIEWS

5.1 Blogger A Cuban in London reviews Nation live at the National
Theatre:

"Though I bought the book at the theatre, I have yet to read it so
this review is mainly focused on the play. As a spectator, I found
it to be teeming with several themes, subtly presented... Above all,
'Nation' is a play that moves easily between humour and tragedy and
does so with quality and panache. This is down, for the most part,
to excellent performances and a superb mise en scene: a rotating
stage that allows multiple settings, an ingenious use of new media,
imaginative props (the vultures and the giant boar are spectacular)
and live music. In the leading roles both Gary Carr (Mau) and Emily
Taaffe (Daphne) stand out..."

http://cubaninlondon.blogspot.com/2010/03/nation-review.html


5.2 NATION: THE GAME

You too can build a Nation:

http://www.nationaltheatre.org.uk/microsite/nation/game/

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

06) GOING, GOING...POSTAL!

The Sky TV broadcast of adaptation of Going Postal is only a few
weeks away now...about seven plus one weeks in fact.

Lisa McGarry at Unreality TV:

"Following the critical and ratings success of Sir Terry
Pratchett's Hogfather and The Colour of Magic, Sky1 HD and Sky1
now brings GOING POSTAL to spectacular life. One of Sir Terry
Pratchett's most popular Discworld novels, GOING POSTAL is a
lavish two part adaptation exclusive to Sky1 HD and Sky1
transmitting at the end of May 2010... GOING POSTAL features an all
star British cast that includes Richard Coyle (Prince of Persia,
Coupling) as Moist Von Lipwig, David Suchet (Agatha Christie's
Poirot) as Reacher Gilt, Charles Dance (Gosford Park, Bleak House)
as Lord Vetinari, and Claire Foy (Little Dorrit) as Adora Belle
Dearheart. Joining them are Steve Pemberton (The League of
Gentlemen, Psychoville) as Drumknott, Andrew Sachs (Fawlty Towers)
as Groat, Timothy West (Bleak House, Brass), Ian Bonar as Stanley,
and Tamsin Greig (Green Wing, Black Books) as Miss Cripslock..."

http://tinyurl.com/y8f3kyb


Jessica Martin at SF Crow's Nest:

"Following the TV adaptation of Terry Pratchett's Hogfather and
The Colour of Magic, the next Discworld film to be produced will be
based on El Tel's novel Going Postal. Going Postal will be a two
part adaptation showing on Sky's cable service late May 2010. For
those who have yet to have the pleasure of reading this novel, Going
Postal is the story of arch-swindler Moist Von Lipwig and the
vengeful Adora Belle Dearheart. A travelling con-artist, Lipwig's
crimes finally catch up with him in the town of Ankh-Morpork..."

http://tinyurl.com/y8abpzz


Also in TV Guide UK, featuring a small but exciting-looking
photograph from a scene in Going Postal:

http://blog.tvguide.co.uk/?p=812

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

07) A SHORT HISTORY OF... PTERRY'S BOOK CHOICE

In a survey to mark World Book Day, Pterry was asked by Sky Arts'
The Book Show to name his favourite book of the past decade. His
pick: Bill Bryson's A Short History of Nearly Everything.

To read the Guardian article which includes a list of all the
authors surveyed and the books they chose, go to:

http://tinyurl.com/yd6qmng

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

08) PTERRY AND ALZHEIMER'S NEWS

8.1 FIRST RECIPIENT OF PRATCHETT ALZHEIMER'S AWARD ANNOUNCED

The Sir Terry Pratchett Fellowship has recognised Dr Tara Caffrey
from Oxford University as its first recipient. Dr Caffrey, who is
researching the Alzheimer's-related tau protein, will receive a
glass award inscribed with a single word chosen by Sir Terry:
"Strive!"

"Speaking in advance of the presentation, Dr Tara Caffrey said:
'Dementia touches so many lives and without any cure, I feel
increased research is essential. Sir Terry is doing fantastic work
to promote understanding of Alzheimer's and increase research
funding. I am proud to receive an award in his name for my own
efforts in dementia research - this amazing recognition is the icing
on the cake.'"

http://tinyurl.com/yc44t45


8.2 ART FOR ALZHEIMER'S

"Art student, Emily Stevens, was so inspired by Terry Pratchett's
David Dimbleby lecture that she is to auction her painting 'The Face
of Alzheimer's'. 'In May 2009 I created it as part of my college
course for the theme of 'Traces, Memory and History'. It's based on
my discoveries and research into Alzheimer's and dementia. My mother
and her friend work in a home and I believe her work and Terry
Pratchett's recent lecture have inspired me to organise a
fundraiser. I am planning on hosting a charity fundraiser, that will
include an auction of my painting and hope to inspire other artists
to get involved so we can raise funds for people with dementia...'"

Emily can be contacted at http://faceofalzheimers.tumblr.com/

http://tinyurl.com/ye6xyar


8.3 NEW GUIDELINES FOR ASSISTED DYING IN UK

Article in The Economist:

"On February 25th Keir Starmer, the director of public prosecutions,
published guidelines setting out the conditions under which those
who help them might escape prosecution. Although committing suicide
was decriminalised in 1961, helping someone commit it is illegal in
England and Wales. The law requires the director of public
prosecutions to use his discretion in deciding whether to bring such
cases to trial... If a person is able to make an informed decision
and has indicated that he wants to die, and if the person who helps
him is motivated wholly by compassion, prosecution would not seem
indicated, even if the helper then inherits the family home..."

http://tinyurl.com/ybdu72r

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

09) SFX READER TOP 25 POLL: LOTS OF PRATCHETT

Night Watch, Guards! Guards!, Wyrd Sisters and Good Omens, took four
places on the top 25 science fiction and fantasy books in SFX
Magazine's new reader poll.

http://tinyurl.com/yjbpxcf
http://www.sfx.co.uk/2010/03/12/top-25-sfx-books/

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 1, continued on Part 2 of 4.
If you did not get all four parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- MARCH 2010 -- PART 2 OF 4 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 2 -- MORE NEWS, REVIEWS AND SUCH

10) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
11) NEW DISCWORLD MINIATURES FROM PJSM PRINTS
12) CONVENTION NEWS
13) NATION REVIEWED BY A HIGH SCHOOL JOURNALIST
14) AUTHOR APPRECIATION: TERRY PRATCHETT
15) PAUL KIDBY INTERVIEW
16) IMAGES OF THE MONTH: LEGO DISCWORLD
17) NEW DISCWORLD FIGURINES
18) LIBRARIANS LOVE THE LIBRARIAN
19) "YOUNG ADULT" LITERATURE, NOW FOR ALL AGES
20) HELP YOUR LOCAL (NOT) LIBRARIAN...

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

10) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS


10.1 UNSEEN ACADEMICALS IN ADELAIDE, FOURECKS

Sir Terry Pratchett's Unseen Academicals
Original adaptation by Stephen Briggs.
Re-worked and Directed for Unseen Theatre Company by Pamela Munt

We all know that man cannot survive on bread alone -- unless of
course he is Lord Havelock Vetinari, Patrician of Ankh-Morpork.
Vetinari usually dines on bread and water followed by the oil that
makes the city of Ankh-Morpork run smoothly. In this year of the
Pensive Hare, people were getting bored, and the oil was wearing a
bit thin. It was threatening to spread out of control via the
vicious street game of foot-the-ball that the people were turning to
for their amusement. A game that they believed was more exciting
than beating other people over the head with big weapons.

Football -- like diplomacy and marriage. Short periods of fighting
followed by long periods of negotiation.

"We play and are played and the best we can hope for is to do it
with style."

The important thing about football -- is that it is not just about
football.

Here we go! Here we go! Here we go!

WHEN: Preview Friday April 9th, Opening Night Sat. April 10th.
Season continues Wed to Sat until April 24.  (all shows at 8pm)
WHERE: The Bakehouse Theatre, 255 Angas Street, Adelaide.
TIX: Adults $18, Conc $15, Groups (10+) $14, Fringe Benefits $14
(FREE TIX NIGHT for holders of Health Cards or the equivalent Friday
9th April)
BOOKINGS: www.bakehousetheatre.com  (no booking fee for on-line
bookings) or phone 82270505 ($2 per ticket booking fee applies)

www.unseen.com.au


10.2 MASKERADE IN HOLBURY

Waterside Theatre Company will present their production of Maskerade
in May. The company, based at Holbury near Southampton in Hampshire,
have already staged three other Pratchett/Briggs Discworld plays and
won awards for all three.

When: 20th - 22nd May 2010
Venue: Waterside Theatre, Holbury

For more information, go to:
http://www.watersidetheatrecompany.talktalk.net/

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

11) NEW DISCWORLD MINIATURES FROM PJSM PRINTS

PJSM Prints announces:

New! The Three Witches

These are 30mm scale, high quality, metal cast miniatures of Granny
Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg & Magrat aloft. The kit will require
preparation, assembly and painting. Provided with 30mm premium
plastic round bases. £27.50

Note: the three Lancre Witches are available separately: Granny
Weatherwax on a Broomstick, Nanny Ogg on a Broomstick, Magrat on a
Broomstick -- each £9.50

Also available, other miniatures including: Foul Ole Ron & Gaspode
£8.00, Duck Man £7.50, Coffin Henry £7.50, Arnold Sideways
£7.50, Captain Carrot £8.00, Angua von Uberwald £7.50, Granny at
the Opera £8.00, Giamo Casanunda £8.00

http://www.pjsmprints.com/miniatures/index.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

12) CONVENTION NEWS

DWCON 2010 UPDATES

Sold Out!

A few days ago we mentioned the con was selling out fast. There's a
fairly predictable kind of reaction when this kind of announcement
is made and now we've signed up member number A900! Just to remind
you all, we're still over five months from the con! The Concom and I
are so very happy that so many of you will be coming to the con in
August, old members and new and we hope that the biggest ever
Discworld Convention will also be the best!

If you've missed the last membership then there is still hope! Our
wonderful membership team have already started to compile a waiting
list and if memberships become available they will be offered to
this list in order. In addition, memberships can be exchanged
between individuals (as long as membership@... is kept up to
date!) and it's always worth checking out our Facebook page, LJ
community and mailing list for such opportunities.

As always, if you have any queries about membership then the
quickest way to get an answer is to mail membership@....

Thanks,
Brian
Chairman, Discworld Convention 2010


Hotel news

Important announcement from the Hotel team There are no more double
rooms to be had in the hotel for the weekend of the Convention. Nil,
nada, zilch, not one. In round figures, zero. There are a few twin
rooms left, still, and "plenty of singles".


Introducing Rob Wilkins

The ConCom are delighted to announce Rob Wilkins as a guest at
Discworld Convention 2010. Rob Wilkins has been Sir Terry's PA for
some years, lurking in the shadows with clipboard and a friendly
smile. You may have seen him in such places as "the bar" and
"hanging around Terry with a drink". Rob has now been elevated from
trusty sidekick status and sometime member of the Convention
Committee, his public awaits.

Rob will be taking part in programme items and being stunt reader
for Sir Terry (a part previously played in the Dimbleby lecture by
Tony Robinson) so Rob has no small task to perform just in reading
bedtime stories. Is he up to the challenge? Can he find his way back
to the bar? Will the mightily bearded Bernard Pearson waylay him
with talk of stamps? Time will tell...


Momentous Times

(from the office of the Cunning Artificer) Hear Ye, Hear Ye!
Yesterday Discworld Emporiums own Bernard Pearson was fairly (ish)
and democratically (sort of) elected, by a landslide, to the office
of town councillor for Wincanton, which we all know is twinned with
Ankh-Morpork. He is currently mobilising the proletariat and
organising an invasion of nearby pubs. He later looks forward to
strengthening ties and reaffirming bonds with our twin town. Huzzah!


Hotel Upgrade and Gala Dinner

Hotel Upgrade News Champagne tastes but beer budget? Want to spend
the Convention in the lap of luxury? Then look no further. We can
now confirm that it is possible to upgrade* your hotel room booking
for the Discworld Convention 2010. Prices based on an existing
standard booking, prices are are per ROOM/SUITE not person and are
in addition to the standard room rate.

Upgrade to an Executive room £50 per night
Upgrade to a Junior suite £130 per night
Upgrade to Kings/Deluxe suite £180 per night
Or our final special offer with only one available Penthouse suite
£250 per night

Limited availability, first come first served. To take advantage of
this special offer email hotel@... with your original booking
details, membership number and the upgrade you would like to
request. If you require a double/twin room for single occupancy
please email hotel@... for availability. Rooms charged at
£100 per night.

*You must have already made a room booking before upgrading


Gala Dinner Update

It's a tough job but somebody has to do it. Your dedicated Gala
dinner team will be making their way to sunny Birmingham on Monday
8th March to complete the arduous task of tasting all of the options
for the Gala dinner menu. If you want to keep tabs on what they are
up to tune to the @dwcon twitter feed. Details on the gala dinner
will be announced over Easter

https://www.dwcon.org/news

Convention Souvenir

A Convention souvenir now being offered for sale with our full
approval, by Mr Barrie Wakeford. It is silver, approximately 1" in
diameter, available as a pin or a pendant, and priced at £30.
Barrie will donate £5 of each sale to the Convention charities. It
should be self-evident what an absolute bargain this is. You can
read a little more about it at
https://www.dwcon.org/content/conpiece

To buy it, visit Barrie's site, Crystal Connections:
http://tinyurl.com/yapu2wn

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

13) NATION REVIEWED BY A HIGH SCHOOL JOURNALIST

On the My High School Journalism site, Marlena Deluna reviews
Nation:

"The book, though dark, is dark in its own humorous way; and though
the subject matter is mature, it isn't too mature for the younger
audiences who wish to challenge themselves with a novel probably
slightly longer than they are used to reading. This kind of age
diversity is unique to Pratchett novels, and may be one of the best
qualities of his books..."

http://tinyurl.com/ye9l7zl

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

14) AUTHOR APPRECIATION: TERRY PRATCHETT

An essay by Becky Levine in a series of "author appreciation week"
blogs:

"If you go to the bookstore and ask for directions to the Terry
Pratchett books, you're likely to be sent to at least two, of not
more, sections. Some will be in the science-fiction/fantasy world,
some will be on the new-book shelves, and some will definitely be in
the YA section. Which means that, when you're shopping for the two
or three of his books that your fourteen-year-old son hasn't read
yet, you know to hunt through the whole store.

"And that's why I appreciate Terry Pratchett. Because while I
would guess he doesn't think too much about who he's writing
for, I *know* that he's writing for my son. Okay, and for me. And
my husband. All three of us laugh out loud—really loud -- at the
same passages. And, yes, we all try and do the thick brogue when we
imitate Rob Anybody or another of the wee free men. Obviously, I
love Pratchett's comedy and would read his books time and time
again if only for the brilliance of his humor. What I love most
about his books, though, is the characters..."

http://tinyurl.com/ybm4utq

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

15) PAUL KIDBY INTERVIEW

A very recent interview from Inside the Artist's Studio with
Discworld artist Paul Kidby:

"Working for Terry has been a wonderful opportunity to flex my
imagination and develop my skills as an illustrator. I don't work
with him as closely as I used to and it's been a while since I
produced any significant body of `Discworld' work, but I am
grateful for the opportunities he gave me... I think my `big
break' was being commissioned to produce the artwork for 'The Last
Hero'..."

http://tinyurl.com/ycaasbj

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

16) IMAGES OF THE MONTH: LEGO DISCWORLD

An entire page of Discworld scenes recreated in Lego by Captain
Smog:

http://tinyurl.com/p2plkf

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

17) NEW DISCWORLD FIGURINES

Miniatures blogger Tianna Starfall shows two new figurines by Kul
Asyrk that will be manufactured for the ongoing Micro Arts
Discworld collection: Detritus with his Piecemaker, and Death on his
Soul Music motorcycle (new pose). The detail work is astonishing:

http://tinyurl.com/ydbfdhl

For more of Kul Asyrk's work, go to:

http://kulasyrk.blogspot.com/

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

18) LIBRARIANS LOVE THE LIBRARIAN

"Librarians have a bit of a reputation to live up to. We expect them
to be kind and resourceful. Well-read. Soft-spoken. These days, the
bun and glasses are optional, but if you ask us, still fun in a
kitschy way. But have you ever wondered what real librarians think
an ideal librarian should be like?"

Librarian Emily Nichols most admires The Librarian: "I have adopted
a mute animal expression in many reference interviews hoping to
elicit the complete query from a patron while using only the word
'ook?'..."

http://tinyurl.com/yhtckl7

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

19) "YOUNG ADULT" LITERATURE, NOW FOR ALL AGES

From the LA Times:

"But increasingly, adults are reading YA books with no ulterior
motives. Attracted by well-written, fast-paced and engaging stories
that span the gamut of genres and subjects, such readers have
mainstreamed a niche long derided as just for kids... Add the
growing number of movies made from kids' books, such as "The
Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants" and "Percy Jackson & the
Olympians: The Lightning Thief," as well as all the successful adult
authors -- James Patterson, Carl Hiaasen, Francine Prose and Terry
Pratchett -- now writing for younger readers, and you've got a
phenomenon 'that extends beyond the gatekeepers who want to know
what their kids are getting into'..."

http://tinyurl.com/yzwg8kc

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

20) HELP YOUR LOCAL (NOT) LIBRARIAN...

New Bruce of BU has some important information about helping
orangutans:

Melbourne Zoo is preparing a submission to go to Food Standards
Australia New Zealand asking for mandatory palm oil labelling on all
food products -- show your support by signing their petition here:

http://www.zoo.org.au/palmoil

Please support their initiative to improve labelling so people can
make informed choices about purchasing products containing palm oil
to avoid supporting an industry that is pushing Orangutans closer
and closer to extinction.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 2 -- continued on Part 3 of 4.
If you did not get all four parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- MARCH 2010 -- PART 3 OF 4 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 3 -- BU NEWSROUND, REVIEW, AND HOROSCOPE

21) AROUND THE BU CAMPUS
22) REVIEW: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS
23) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

21) AROUND THE BU CAMPUS

21.1 HOW TO MAKE SCUBBO IN ROUNDWORLD

I am collecting scubbo recipes. Does anybody have one they would
like to share with me? I have six that I have cooked and served to
friends, about 10 that aren't quite refined yet.

-- BethEllen

I think the essential ingredient is boiling water and anything else
is serendipitous. Perhaps you could ask five friends to all bring an
ingredient chosen at random from their pantries, boil it all
together and...order pizza :)

-- New Bruce

Oh my! The first time I read that, I thought you said to use
ingredients  chosen at random from their PANTIES!!! That brings a
new horror to the  concept of scubbo!

BethEllen, are you looking for real recipes for scubbo-like food
that is  good to eat, or scubbo horrors? *Real* scubbo doesn't have
a recipe,  it's made from whatever you can scavenge or steal on a
battlefield.

One thing I am very keen on, is what we call "chicken guts stew".
Start with chicken gizzards and/or hearts, put them in a crockpot or
slow cooker with assorted vegetables (onion, capsicum, celery, too
much garlic, carrots, potatoes...), add tinned diced tomatoes, white
wine, herbs (chives, parsley, more too much garlic), hot chilli
peppers to taste, and cook for a day or two.

Then add small pasta (alphabet noodles for preference, if you can
find  them, because they are awesome) and serve. It's a lovely
filling,  protein-rich, low-fat cheap meal. And in the best
conditions of scubbo  and peasant-food everywhere, it will give the
horrors to those who  aren't used to eating the bits of the animal
that are left over when  the rich buggers have taken all the good
bits.

-- Steven


If they are undergarments of the ilk of Nanny Ogg's knickers, I'm
sure that would be very productive :)

-- New Bruce

Oops, I meant traditions.

-- Steven

The sentence made sense though, I assumed you were being ironic!

-- Jase

The juices can be sopped up with garlic bread too!

-- New Bruce


21.2 KEEPING YOUR PTERRY PAPERBACKS OPEN

While researching book holders to help my wife battle giant textbooks
without exacerbating back pain, I came across this

http://www.dansdata.com/bookgem.htm

Scroll down...scroll down...keep going...

There it is! Spotto!

while the mild wear and distinct yellowing of the pages denote this as a
reasonably aged and well read copy of the book, it doesn't have the
folds up the spine that my copy has, so he's obviously a careful reader.
However, looks like this device will fix that problem up...

-- Jase

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

22) REVIEW: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS

Steve Wishnevsky, book reviewer for the Winston-Salem Journal, gives
a good overall description of what Discworld -- and Pratchett's
writing -- is and isn't, and a short review of Unseen Academicals:

"His characters live exuberantly. They do things. In the slums of
Ankh-Morpork, they do 'fings.' The city of Ankh-Morpork has become a
major character in the 33 or so canonical Discworld novels... So
there you have the mix: soccer hooligans, high fashion, sexually
liberated dwarves, quite a bit of cookery, and an orangutan goalie.
He is really the UU librarian and a wizard. Don't ask..."

http://tinyurl.com/yf92z77

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

23) THE NEW DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

by Fernando Magnifico

Buongiorno my friends! Fernando has the bad news today, for the Lady
Asterisk is not available, for she has sat on a tube of glue and
can't get up from her armchair. But do not be concerned, for
Fernando shall be your astrologer today!

My friends, Fernando has a correction to make! Last month, Fernando
mentioned the expensive chocolates from Wienrich and Boettcher on
Zephire Street. Since then, Fernando has received dozens of letters
and c-mails from readers complaining that Wienrich and Boettcher do
not "make chocolates", as Fernando said. They CREATE them. Please
forgive Fernando's ignorance, and Fernando will be sure to never
make that mistake again.

Who would have thought one little word could make such a difference?
But it is true, my friends, trust me on this, for Fernando knows
that it is so! Words are molto important, and mastery of words and
can make all the differenzia between successing and failing in so
much of life, such as the time Fernando's uncle Rafael told the
landlord to go molest a donkey, instead of what he meant to say,
which was "Yes sir". This are why Fernando has done study the
Morporkian so gooderer to be his speakings is better. You too can
share Fernando's mastery of the words if you read many books, but
Fernando understands that for the many people in Ankh-Morpork,
reading is the unfamiliar and slightly scary activity. But do not be
afeared my friends, for Fernando understands, and has asked the
stars to recommend a book to get started.

Ciao bella!

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Adamant Hedgehog  21 Mar - 20 Apr

Hoggers, your book this month is the best-selling novel written by
Dennis Umber, "The Quirmian Cipher". Could there be anyone in Ankh-
Morpork who has not already read this book? Fernando knows that
people are speaking about this everywhere. Fernando has even heard
unlicenced muggers in the Shades talking excitedly about it -- and
don't think that Fernando isn't grateful, for it allowed him to get
away with his purse. For the benefit of anyone who has been living
in a cave (like Fernando's uncle Augustus, who fell out of a tree,
hit his head, and declared that Blind Io had told him to give away
all his earthly possessions and dedicate his life to teaching
weasels to communicate through the medium of interpretive dance),
Fernando can tell you that "The Quirmian Cipher" is the story of
murder and conspiracy among the priests of Offler the Crocodile God.
Fortunately for the author, Offler's priests say that Offler
approves whole-heartedly of murder and conspiracy, so long as it is
being done for the glory of Offler, and the book's editor being
eaten by a crocodile in his bath was just a coincidence.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Half-Eaten Sandwich  21 Apr - 21 May

The stars tell Fernando that your book is "Blown Away", a passionate
saga set against the background of a World Gone Mad! Fernando had
not yet come to Ankh-Morpork when the famous Victor Maraschino and
the bella Delores De Syn made the infamous moving picture of "Blown
Away", but word of it reached all the way to Brindisi. Fernando has
heard from many people that the moving picture was molto excellente,
but the book is even better: it has more passion, the world is more
mad, and there are TEN THOUSAND ELEPHANTS! Who could want more than
this in a book?

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Herne the Hunted  22 May - 21 Jun

Hernians, the stars have said that your book is "The Fierce Ones",
by Leon N. Champagne, about the author's time in the Tezuman
jungles. The Unseen University Librarian tells Fernando that this
book has the 57th longest subtitle of any book: "Six Years Among The
Savage Yibinini By The Shores Of The Oranoki River, Whereby Your
Distinguished Author Witnessed Shocking And Appalling Scenes Of
Savagery, Ferocity And Lasciviousness Even More Shocking And
Appalling Than Those Of His Previous Monograph 'The Savages Of The
Klatchian Steppes'."

Remember it well, my friends, for some day it will win you a bet in
a pub.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Wizard's Staff and Knob  22 Jun - 22 Jul

Fernando knows that many Staffies are actual wizards, and will have
a professional interest in this book: "You've Got To Be Joshing,
Professor Turnipseed!", the biography of Ankh-Morpork's own Adrian
Turnipseed, Professor at Brazeneck College and inventor of
Brazeneck's Quite Big Thing "Pex". Fernando has read "You've Got To
Be Joshing", and it is a very entertaining and educational book by a
brilliant wizard. Fernando was thrilled to read of the Professor's
anecdotes and adventures at Unseen University, and was molto excited
to learn of how many times Professor Turnipseed has saved the city
from the ghastly Things From The Dungeon Dimensions, elves, Mrs
Cake, and divers terrible creatures. Fernando knows that it was
certainly a coup for Brazeneck to snatch Unseen University's
greatest wizard away from them like that!

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Bilious, God of Hangovers  23 Jul - 23 Aug

Bilians, your book is the infamous celebration of excess in all
things related to the recreational use of chemicals, "Anxiety and
Odium in Pseudopolis" by Orion Q. Tomassen. Fernando does not judge,
but he has met Tomassen, and the only thing he won't put up his nose
is his own elbow. My friends, Fernando understands that sometimes
people need a little comfort when dealing with the cruelties of
life, and if this comes from a bottle or a powder, Fernando knows we
all seek the succour where we can find it. Some find it in good
books, some find it in tinctures, and some find it in good books
about people finding it in tinctures. Just do not be like Fernando's
uncle Lambrusco, whose only comfort is to get plastered (as they say
in Ankh-Morpork) and then make everyone else miserable.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 3 -- continued on Part 4 of 4.
If you did not get all four parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- MARCH 2010 -- PART 4 OF 4 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 4 -- HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED, AND CLOSE

24) HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED  AUG > MAR
25) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

24) HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED

The Celestial Parsnip  24 Aug - 23 Sept

Snippies are well known for being honest, trusting and kind. It is a
strange thing, but many peoples are attracted to books about people
who are their complete opposite, and so it is with Snippies, for the
stars have said that your book is "Morporkian Bottler". This is the
story of Clovis Pickles, a Morporkian banker by day who roams the
backstreets of the Shades by night, murdering ladies of negotiable
affection in the most gruesome fashion, eating dwarfs, and
terrorising the elderly. Fernando knows that this book has been
banned by five cities and innumerable villages across the Sto
Plains. It is banned for sale in Ankh-Morpork by order of the
Patrician himself, although Fernando knows that due to a statute
dating from the time of Alberto Malich, the book remains available
to be read by gentlemen of good character under the supervision of
the UU Librarian. For those who aren't gentlemen of good character,
Fernando knows a man who knows a dwarf who knows a printer in Sto
Kerrig who sells copies at very reasonable prices. Reasonable for
the printer, that is, not the reader.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Small Boring Group of Faint Stars  24 Sept - 23 Oct

Many Boring'uns are well known for their, how do you say it,
pedantic and obsessive attention to the detail. Fernando does not
judge, it takes all sorts of people to make a Disc, and sometimes
such a person is exactly what is needed. When Fernando was young and
irresponsible, he, shall we say, distracted the mayor's daughter
Francesca while she was picking wild mushrooms for the Soul Duck
Tuesday feast. It was very sad, half the village thought they had
been turned into rabbits and the other half spent the night
clutching trees and begging them not to fly away. It took months
before Fernando's Auntie Rosa-Marie could look at Uncle Salvatore
without turning bright red. Such a thing would never have happened
if Francesca were a Boring'un! (Fernando once witnessed with his
very own eyes a Boring'un naturalist catalogue fleas one-handed
while clinging with his other hand to the back of a furious wild
boar. His monograph "On The Eighty-Seven Species Of Flea Found On
The Greater Kythian Swine" was awarded the silver medal at the
Naturalist's Guild in the Year of the Purple Toad.) For such
Boring'uns, the stars have said that your book is all seventeen
volumes of the Encyclopaedia Morporkia, which will give you many,
many hours of entertainment writing to the editors correcting their
errors. But Fernando warns that you should get the expurgated
version: the one without the gannet. Fernando does not approve of
the gannet, for it wets its nest.


%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Androgyna Majestis  24 Oct - 22 Nov

Andies, Fernando has the bad news, for the stars have said that your
book is "Phyle", by T.R.C. Prettyheart. Fernando does not understand
why Mr Prettyheart is famous, or perhaps infamous would be better,
for his silly stories of no particular skill or imagination.
Fernando does not judge, but he will make an exception here: those
few readers of Prettyheart are lacking in good taste, good sense, or
both. "Phyle" is, even for Prettyheart, a terrible book: it has
parrots, pigs, ghost girls, cannibals, half-naked savages (Fernando
approves of this one), and invisible old men who TALK LIKE THIS. But
do not be afeared, my friends, for it is not true that this book has
no redeeming merit. Fernando knows that it is printed on very thin,
soft paper.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Spoons, a.k.a. the Greater and Lesser Spoons,  23 Nov - 21 Dec

Spooners, the stars have told Fernando that your book is the travel
book "Here and There Again" by Billy-Bob Buboes. Fernando knows this
book very well, for it has been translated to Brindisian and for the
many years a certain class of person would call their pet dog
"Frogo" after a character in the book. "Here and There Again" tells
of Buboes' journeys through the Forest of Skund, his adventures in
elf-infested forests, and the travels through deep goblin-mines, as
he tried to return a ring to his uncle before he was written out of
the will.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Hoki the Jokester  22 Dec - 20 Jan

Hokians are known for their sense of humour, and Fernando knows that
sometimes this is not for the soft-hearted. Who has not laughed and
laughed to watch the fat man slip on the bananananana peel and fall
over onto a small dog? One of the yappy ones. Fernando knows that
sometimes the classic japes are the best. Fernando has the good news
for you, for the stars have said that your book is Harry "Flashy"
Fraser's autobiography of his student days at UU during a more
robust time, before the current Archchancellor. His pranks and jokes
on younger, smaller students will bring a smile to the face of many
Hokians. Fernando has read of the time he turned Frank Khaki into a
giant cockroach. He also turned Arthur Piddleton into a giant
beetle, and Robby Weasel into a giant butterfly. Oh how the senior
boys laughed! Flashy's book was published posthumously from notes in
his diary, after he turned Eric Brown into a giant wasp.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Rather Large Gazunda  21 Jan - 18 Feb

Gazundians, your book is "The Tunnel Of Rodents", a historical novel
of Ancient Agatea. It is the story of Master Lai, a wizard with a
slight flaw in his character, a peasant called Yak, the overthrow of
the wicked Duke of Ja'aw, the murder of a dancing girl, and a
goddess trapped on the Disc and unable to return to Cori Celesti.
Fernando knows that this is a wonderful adventure story, but even
more wonderfully, every word is true! Trust Fernando on this, for he
was told this by a small smiling wrinkly wise man in a yellow robe,
and they are known for their uncommon wisdom.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Lesser Umbrage   19 Feb - 20 Mar

Umbragians, your book is "A Field Guide To Natives Of The Shades",
by Sir Ragnald Hosepipe III. If you have ever wondered about the
divers thieves, bandits, mountebanks, picaroons, swindlers,
marauders, rogues, cutpurses and filchers who live in the Shades,
but have too much sense to go walking there yourself, then this book
will be of great interest. Fernando knows that Sir Ragnald spent
many years walking through the Shades, armed only with a notepad and
pencil, boundless confidence that bad things happen to other people,
and a small army of troll body guards. Sir Ragnald and his trolls
finally met an untimely end while working on his second book, which
was to be a guide to the desert tribes of Klatch.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

25) CLOSE

That brings the March issue to a close. See you next month, same
time, same place. Regular WOSSNAME editor Annie Mac will be back
soon, or so she claims. May the Soul Cake Duck bring you happiness,
or at least a basket of duck eggs.

-- Steven D'Aprano, your Acting Editor

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 4.
If you did not get all four parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
3rd APRIL 2010
*********************************************************************

SPECIAL EDITION APRIL 2010: A NEW LETTER FROM THE MASTER

*********************************************************************

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

INDEX:

1) LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
2) UPDATE FROM THE MASTER

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

1) LETTER FROM THE EDITOR

The WOSSNAME team offer their condolences to Sir Pterry and family
on the death of his mother. He announced this in a new letter at
PJSM Prints (reprinted below).

In other news, I Shall Wear Midnight is now finished, the film of
Going Postal will air on Sky in May 2010, and our favourite author
is now off on a much needed and well deserved holiday.

We wish him peace of mind and all good fortune.

-- Steven D'Aprano, Acting Editor

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

2) A NEW LETTER FROM PTERRY

DEATH / DYING / ASSISTED SUICIDE / THE NEW GOING POSTAL TRAILER &
THE THIEVES' GUILD CREST

Folks,

Thursday. A moment of unexpected peace and quiet which allows me to
get on and do the mail. It's a little bit difficult to do even that.
My mother is dead, but not yet cremated. It is an uneasy period,
feared all down the years, with rituals to ward off evil influences
and keep the soul of the dead safe. It is a time of loss but not
closure, and it makes me almost genetically uneasy.

At least the mail concentrates the mind. The mail mountain has been
huge for years, but since the Dimbleby lecture it has become
Himalayan in nature. A great many of the letters and e-mails from
fans are easy to deal with; it's the new ones that summon my
attention now, like the one here from the elderly lady who says
"when people say that organisations for the disabled are against
assisted suicide, who have they asked? No one has ever asked my
opinion! Personally, I hope for a quick and painless death however
it comes, but I think I am far too old to be dictated to."

Next, I'm sent a URL to rant about the Liverpool Care Pathway (LCP).
The LCP is, in short, a means of allowing the dying to die in
comfort when all medical intervention has failed. It is a tick-box
system, perhaps rightly so, but I spend some time following the
dreary trail of objections from those, who, I swear won't be happy
unless we all die praying. It could be euthanasia by the back door,
you see, or assisted dying by stealth or, for all I know a holiday
caravan for Satan and his little imps.

Of course, this is the Internet, and these people love the Internet
because you don't get challenged and it doesn't matter if you make
things up. You can scare and assert to your heart's content, without
qualification or come back.

To me, innocently, it seems that since it is inevitable that some
people will die in hospital, a formalisation of the process fits
these idiotic bureaucratic times.

The day brightens a little with a genuine crackpot; I don't get as
many of these as some people might think. But this one is rather
nasty. There are about eight pages of very small writing in a tone
that we have all come to know. In so far as it can be read, I will
go to hell because God loves me.

That's funny. What isn't is the fact that several times on the pages
there is a hand drawn picture of what appears to be Jesus, not just
crucified but eviscerated. Rob grabs it and puts it on the fire.

And now there's another one from a former nurse who was appalled to
see elderly ladies being force-fed in a hospice, against their
feeble protestations. I get quite a few letters from former nurses.
Seldom is their purpose to tell me about the wonders of care homes.

This sort of thing is interspersed with, of course, news of snake
oil cures for Alzheimer's, requests for signed book (the full range
of signed Discworld paperbacks is now available HERE)[1] and
invitations to come and talk to schools hundreds of miles away on
the basis that it will only take half an hour of my time. It's
standard fare.

But here is a new one, ostensibly from a doctor, saying that doctors
and hospitals know what they are doing and discussions for things
like assisted dying only complicate the issue. I can't reply,
firstly because he has wisely left of his name and address and also
I would rather prefer that the issue remained complex.

There are three states in the US and four countries in Europe where
some sort of assisted dying is legal. I know something about them,
but not enough. I intend to know a lot more. To the best of my
knowledge the practices, in some at least, usually involve only the
prospective patient and the medical profession. I think that a
properly working society requires more than that and this brings me
to another letter which various people send to me, and which leads
me to believe that there is a kind of person who does this sort of
thing for a hobby. Alison Davis is a lady with a number of
debilitating conditions, all unpleasant. She has been quoted as
saying that many years ago she was so depressed that she might have
opted for assisted suicide had it been available, and now is glad
she did not.

This is regularly hurled forward as an argument against assisted
dying, put forward by people like the Care Not  Killing Alliance. In
fact it is not an argument against assisted dying, it is an argument
against unthoughtout and unregulated assisted death. All those I
know who are serious about this believe that assisted dying should
only be available to people who are of a sound mind (perhaps, at
least, rather sounder than the author of the eviscerated Christ
letter) and possessed of a terminal and untreatable condition.
Therefore Ms Davis' request for an assisted death would have been
politely but firmly rejected by the tribunal as proposed despite her
feelings at that time. It has always been part of the thinking in
this matter that the tribunal system would have, as an important
part of its remit, the urging of alternatives as well as proposals
for a cooling off period and whatever else wise people can suggest.

You probably don't know any of this, because there is no actual
debate on the subject given that the other side disappear into the
distance screaming "Slippery slope! Slippery slope!" and generally
doing their best to suggest that we might as well march the elderly
and infirm into the gas chambers.

My anonymous doctor, rather testily, finished "why are you getting
involved in this? You've got, surely, enough money not to have to
worry."

Well, I hope that's true; it certainly isn't true for everyone.
Besides I'm not in it for that reason. I recognise the opposition.
It's the opposition to legalise votes for women, abortion, the
extension of the franchise and once upon a time the opposition to
giving painkillers to women in labour, on the basis that they should
pay for 'the sin of Eve'. Queen Victoria, famously fecund, put a
stop to that evil stupidity. I recognise their tone of voice; it is
the headmaster enraged because the fifth form are being cheeky.
There is no shame because they know they are right even if, in some
cases, they are on the right. Jeers, sneers and smears and, of
course, repeatedly, adhominom arguments are all, therefore, fair
enough.

In every case there was a chorus that forecast, more or less the end
of the world. Well, here we are and if the world is ending it would
appear to be for other reasons. People, you and me, are not trusted.
The right doesn't like us because we don't do what we're told by our
betters, and the left doesn't like us because it secretly thinks we
would be on the right given half a chance and a lottery win. And
both think we should not make our own decisions, because we might
make the wrong ones.

Almost every decision to take one's own life is a bad decision.

Last night our local TV news dealt with the inquest of an elderly
couple who, fearful of their future, had decided to take their own
lives and meticulously gassed themselves. I suspect, given that they
were sensible people who had clearly thought long and hard about
their decision, no tribunal would have prevented that. Though if
they had qualified for an assisted death under a tribunal system,
they would not have had to resort to such desperate measures to end
their lives.

We are presented with a version G.K.Chesterton's game 'Fool the
Prophet'. Governments and religions make rules that the compliant
populous puts up with right up until they decide not to. Suicide and
assisted dying will continue to happen no matter what opponents may
hope and we know that by far the majority of people in this country
are in favour of it being available in the terms I have just
mentioned. Almost every politician pushes that fact aside. I must
say I am rather surprised at Ann Widecombe who, I always thought had
her head screwed on, but it turns out that it is against the thread.
For one thing, she doesn't seem to realise that it is legal to argue
for the legalisation of something that is currently illegal. If this
were not the case, there would be no such thing as politics.

Anyway, on a much lighter note and, oh boy, lighter notes are in
short supply right now, the words "The End" have been written on I
Shall Wear Midnight, but the last draft has been delayed, by what
might be called the circumstances of the human condition.
Nevertheless, we press on.

We've been to see the full-length adaptation of Going Postal on a
big screen at Twentieth Century Fox in London, which was excellent,
and I have to say that the clacks is beautifully done... and
although I promised not to give away too much, there's not long to
wait as it will be on your screens in May, but I don't know the
exact date yet -- maybe someone at Sky tosses a coin and makes the
decision? Though please be aware that although we are getting a lot
of enquiries, there will definitely not be a premiere on this
occasion, the money is going to be spent on advertising rather than
on booze; preferably I would have preferred the booze, but marketing
departments prefer advertising. STOP PRESS: Sky have just sent us
the new trailer so click HERE[2] and enjoy.

I am also getting lots of enquiries about my sword. Well, the sword
is finished and when we get the pedigree back from the blacksmith we
will write about it more fully.

More news: I was interviewed by Stephen Sackur for BBC HARDtalk. If
you're in the UK you can catch it on the iPlayer HERE.[3]

And I have to say that although I thought the Seamstresses pin was
superb, the Thieves' Guild Crest is actually one of my favourites,
especially if you were one of the lucky ones to get a glow in the
dark variant. A nice touch.

There'll be more from me soon, I hope, once we've navigated our
way back down the mail mountain and returned from Cannes, where me
and Rob are off to in a couple of weeks.

All the best.

(signed) Terry Pratchett


[1] http://www.pjsmprints.com/paperbacks/index.html
[2] http://sky1.sky.com/going-postal-about
[3] http://tinyurl.com/ybb7ssh


To view the original letter, with photographs, go to:
http://www.pjsmprints.com/news/index.html

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
APRIL 2010 (Volume 13, Issue 4)
*********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a FREE publication for members of the worldwide
Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North
American Discworld Society and other continental groups. Are you a
member? Yes, if you sent in your name, country and e-mail address.
Are there any dues? No! As a member of the Klatchian Foreign Legion,
you'd only forget them...
*********************************************************************
Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
Editor Emeritus (retd): Joseph Schaumburger
News Editor: Fiona (not Bruce) Bruce
Newshounds: Vera, Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow
Staff Writers: Asti Osborn, Pitt the Elder, Steven D'Aprano
Convention Reporters: Mithtrethth Hania Ogg et al
Staff Technomancer: Jason Parlevliet
Book Reviews: Drusilla D'Afanguin
Puzzle Editor: Tiff
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
DW Horoscope: Lady Anaemia Asterisk, Fernando Magnifico
Emergency Staff: Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare
time)
Copyright 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

------------------------------------------------------------------------

INDEX:

====Part 1 -- ALL THE NEWS THAT FITS

01) QUOTE OF THE MONTH
02) LETTER FROM THE (ACTING) EDITOR
03) HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SIR PTERRY!
04) GOING POSTAL NEWS
05) STILL TIME TO VOTE FOR YOUR FAVOURITE Y.A. BOOKS
06) PTERRY TO GUEST-EDIT SFX MAGAZINE
07) NATION SHORTLISTED FOR CARNEGIE MEDAL
08) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS UP FOR LOCUS AWARD
09) SIR PTERRY TO BE KEYNOTE SPEAKER AT WRITERS' FESTIVAL

====Part 2 -- MORE NEWS

10) DISCWORLD GROUPS MEETING NEWS
11) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
12) CONVENTION NEWS

====Part 3 -- ...AND MORE, AND HOROSCOPE

13) PTERRY AND ALZHEIMER'S NEWS
14) NAC MAC FEEGLE FIGURINES: GOING, GOING...
15) PTERRY HELPS SAVE VILLAGE CHURCH
16) IMAGES OF THE MONTH: HUMOROUS VEGETABLES?
17) TIM'S TURN AS TRYMON
18) DISCWORLD SCULPTURE WINS THE DAY IN IOWA
19) PRATCHETT BOOKS CAN LEAD TO LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT
20) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE  MAR > AUG

====Part 4 --  HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED, AND CLOSE

24) HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED  AUG > MAR
25) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

01) QUOTE OF THE MONTH

"Most science fiction writers were once fans. There's a habit they
have, not of paying back, but of paying forward. I know of no other
branch of literature where the established 'names' so keenly
encourage wannabe writers to become their competitors."

-- Terry Pratchett, "Paperback Writer", the Guardian (2003)

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

02) LETTER FROM THE (ACTING) EDITOR

One of the Discworld's most enduring and popular characters is
Unseen University's Librarian, a wizard who was turned into a
orangutan in a magical accident. The Librarian is now iconic enough
that some fans are known to describe all orangutans as "Librarians".
Orangutans are our genetic cousins: we share 97% of our DNA with
them, and the distant ancestors of human beings and orangutans
parted company a mere 14 million years ago. They are our close
cousins, with only gorillas and chimpanzees closer.

(For those who wonder at my use of the word "mere", remember that
life on Earth is at least 3.5 billion years old. To use the hoary
old analogy, if the origin of life on Earth was midnight on January
1st, and right now was just an instant before midnight on New Year's
Eve, then our ancestors split from the orangutans' ancestors at the
equivalent of lunchtime on December 30th. Four minutes to 1pm to be
precise.)

Anyone who has been privileged enough to see an orangutan up close,
even if it is through a glass wall at a zoo, will report just how
human-like they are. They might not be as intelligent as Unseen
University's Librarian (it was a *magical* accident, after all) but
they are amazingly human-like, with deep soulful eyes, emotions and
sentience. They are also one of the elite handful of tool-using
species. Perhaps you wouldn't trust them to mow your lawn, let alone
fly a spaceship, but great-to-the-700-thousand-granddad was no
better and we ended up okay.

Unfortunately, we may be the last generation to see these wonderful
animals. Both orangutan species are in danger from poaching for
food, the illegal pet trade, and especially from habitat loss. There
are fewer than 60,000 orangutans remaining, and without active
efforts to save them, they could be extinct in just 10-30 years. The
world will be darker, sadder, and less interesting without them.

The world is a big place and there is plenty of room for the
orangutans as well as us, if we choose. There are 6.8 billion human
beings on this planet doing their bit to ensure that Homo sapiens
survives; surely we can spare a bit of effort to save the
Librarians? Sir Terry Pratchett is on the Board of Trustees of the
UK Orangutan Foundation, a charitable foundation in the UK which
does excellent work for the conservation of these amazing animals.
The Orangutan Conservancy also does excellent work. Just as
important as charitable donations is political awareness: let your
local MP or Congressperson know that you care about orangutans, that
you oppose the continuing destruction of their habitat, and that you
support the use of environmentally sustainable oil and timber
products. There is still hope for the Librarians.

http://www.orangutan.org.uk/
http://www.orangutan.net/

-- Steven D'Aprano, Acting Editor

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

03) A VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

WOSSNAME would like to raise a toast to Sir Pterry on the occasion
of his birthday (28th April). Congratulations, and keep those books
coming!

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

04) GOING POSTAL NEWS

4.1 GOING POSTAL: THE TRAILER

In Den of Geek, a glimpse of next month's Sky TV production of Going
Postal:

"If the two-part movie adaptation of Going Postal is anything close
to approaching the production values and quality of Hogfather and
The Colour Of Magic, then we should have something very special to
look forward to, and with such a stellar cast, also including the
likes of Charles Dance, Steve Pemberton, Timothy West and Andrew
Sachs, it's looking very likely. Have a look at the trailer and see
what you think and we'll let you know the broadcast details as they
come to light..."

http://tinyurl.com/2aerwbw


4.2 PTERRY ON THE FILM ADAPTATION

In The Independent, Matilda Battersby has an in-depth interview with
the author:

"The television version comes in two hour-long episodes, closely
resembling the book in both dialogue and feel, although the ending
and some smaller features have been amended, which hawkish readers
might be offended by. Pratchett is notably upset by such changes. He
says: 'With great power comes great frustration. Sometimes, when on
set, I'd pipe up and say 'that isn't right!' But often you
have to recognise that the form has to change in adaptation. I know
that the readers on the whole won't mind too much... I recently
had a complicated phone call with someone who had to abridge a
Discworld book. He said that just when you think "Oh that bit's
nonsense, I can cut that," you realise it forms it the entire basis
of the plot and have to start all over again. We had this problem
with "Going Postal," as the phrase "The falling angel meets the
rising ape" has particular importance and they wanted to cut it,"
he says... 'The fans will look out for the scenery shaking and any
alterations in the stories' adaptations, but the readers are not
quite so particular.'..."

http://tinyurl.com/y57nhll


4.3 GOING POSTAL...DOWN UNDER

Going Postal has secured a home-entertainment deal and an Australian
pay-TV slot through agreements signed by ALL3MEDIA International.
Louise Pedersen, the managing director at ALL3MEDIA International,
said, "We are very pleased to work with the highly respected and
renowned producer Mob Film Company in bringing this spectacular
drama to fruition. We are seeing great demand from international
broadcasters looking for major drama productions for their primetime
schedules, so now is the perfect time to launch Going Postal. Terry
Pratchett is a hugely popular author around the world and this
captivating adaptation offers wide audience appeal."

[Info courtesy of Colin Smythe]

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

05) STILL TIME TO VOTE FOR YOUR FAVOURITE Y.A. BOOKS!

1. Vote for your top ten YA books of all time (not just this year or
last year) by 11:59 on April 30, 2010. YA in this case will indicate
a readership of 13 and over. This is a loose definition but is in
place to differentiate it from Middle Grade. You can provide
reasoning for a book if you feel it belongs in the YA category.
However, I retain the right of refusal.

2. List these books in your order of preference (stating both title
and author). Your #1 YA book would be the one you feel is the most
important, so it will receive 10 points. Your #2 choice will be only
9 points. And so on and such. So be very careful how you order your
books. Ranking titles incorrectly might lead to an "interesting"
group of results so please be careful to do this correctly.

3. Submit these books to me at adele@... or via
this Google Doc. Write "YA Book Poll" in the subject line.

4. If you like, you can submit what you like about each title. At
the beginning of May I will tally up the totals and I will quote
from the submitted pieces why one individual or another liked a
particular book (citing the reader). That way we can share why we
liked one book or another. I will then count down from 100 to 1 the
top choices of what people feel the best YA titles of all time are.

Please feel free to invite others to take part in this poll by
forwarding this email to them. The more participants (in all fields
and locations) the better.

Thank you for your consideration,
Adele
PersnicketySnark.com

For more information, go to:
http://tinyurl.com/yhgh3yg

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

06) PTERRY TO GUEST-EDIT SFX MAGAZINE

Terry Pratchett will be the guest editor of next month's issue of
SFX magazine Issue 196, published on 5th May 2010 to signal the
start of a three-month "Summer of SF Reading" campaign.

"Across the next three issues SFX will  increased books coverage,
with Orion sci-fi imprint Gollancz as sponsor. Meanwhile
Waterstone's will be signposting the books which the magazine
recommends in-store. Pratchett's SFX edit includes a retrospective
of his favourite sci-fi film 'Blade Runner', a retrospective on the
writings of John Wyndham, and a piece on 'Doctor Who' written by
Pratchett himself. Dave Bradley, SFX editor-in-chief, said that
importance of books to the sci-fi genre was something that deserved
'a special celebration'..."

Issue 196 will be available on 5th May at a cover price of £3.99.
For those abroad, SFX Magazine is normally available as an import at
various genre booksellers.

http://tinyurl.com/2vhozr9

http://www.sfx.co.uk


More information about Pterry's guest editing spot can be found at:

http://tinyurl.com/2cs4963


Also, as SFX magazine is published from Bath (UK), the Bath
Chronicle has the news as local:

"Sir Terry -- who once worked as a sub-editor on The Bath Chronicle
-- has been actively involved in planning the issue, which is out
next Wednesday. The writer, who lives near Salisbury, has also
written a piece about Doctor Who for the website while the magazine
has a behind-the-scenes report from the Sky1 adaptation of his book
Going Postal..."

http://tinyurl.com/3829e3p

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

07) NATION SHORTLISTED FOR CARNEGIE MEDAL

Nation has been shortlisted for the 2010 Carnegie Medal. The winner
will be announced at a ceremony at BAFTA in London on 24th June.

The full shortlist is:

Chains (Laurie Halse Anderson)
The Graveyard Book (Neil Gaiman)
The Vanishing of Katerina Linden (Helen Grant)
Rowan the Strange (Julie Hearn)
The Ask and the Answer (Patrick Ness)
Nation (Terry Pratchett)
Fever Crumb (Philip Reeve)
Revolver (Marcus Sedgwick)

http://tinyurl.com/24bh6h7

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

08) UNSEEN ACADEMICALS UP FOR LOCUS AWARD

Unseen Academicals has been shortlisted for the 2010 Locus Award, in
the Fantasy category. The full shortlist is:

The City & The City (China Mieville)
Unseen Academicals (Terry Pratchett)
Drood (Dan Simmons)
Palimpsest (Catherynne M. Valente)
Finch (Jeff VanderMeer)

Winners will be presented during the Science Fiction Awards Weekend
in Seattle WA, June 25-27, 2010. Tickets are $40 and include Locus
events on Saturday June 26, a free day-pass to the SF Museum, and
special invitation to the  Science Fiction Hall of Fame ceremony.
Tickets can be purchased online through Paypal, or by phone at (510)
339-9198.

http://tinyurl.com/y4vhfvs

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

09) SIR PTERRY TO BE KEYNOTE SPEAKER AT WRITERS' FESTIVAL

From the Hampshire Chronicle:

"The best-selling author, who lives near Salisbury, will give the
main speech at the festival on June 26. His talk at Winchester
University is titled Why Are You Listening To Me When You Should be
at Home Writing? Barbara Large, director of the writers'
conference, said: 'Sir Terry is a master storyteller. He has an
incisive wit, is a keen observer of the fantastical and has the
profound ability to entertain and inform us with his spectacular
inventive comic satire. We're very much looking forward to
welcoming him to the university.' The Winchester Writers'
Conference, Festival and Bookfair that runs from June 25-27 is now
in its 30th year. Following the three-day event there will be a week
of writing workshops..."

http://tinyurl.com/2ue96zh


For would-be participants:

To receive a conference programme for the Winchester Writers'
Conference please contact the Conference Director, Barbara Large
MBE, Research and Knowledge Exchange Centre, University of
Winchester, Winchester, Hampshire S022 4NR. For more information
call 01962 827238, email Barbara.Large@... or visit
www.writersconference.co.uk

http://www.booktrade.info/index.php/showarticle/26753

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-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 1, continued on Part 2 of 4
If you did not get all four parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- APRIL 2010 -- PART 2 OF 4 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 2 -- MORE NEWS

10) DISCWORLD GROUPS MEETING NEWS
11) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
12) CONVENTION NEWS

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

10) DISCWORLD GROUPS MEETING NEWS

10.1 WINCANTON SPRING EVENT: THE MERRIE MONTH OF MAY'S MORRIS

News from the Cunning Artificer:

As our annual Spring Event on the 1st and 2nd of May fast
approaches, we are pleased to announce that Sir Terry Pratchett has
agreed to get his hands dirty! With the building of Treacle Mine
Road and Peach Pie Street now well under way Sir Terry has been
invited to make his mark. To celebrate this momentous occasion in
our towns history Sir Terry will make a monumental mess of the
pavement, and like Marylin Monroe and Clint Eastwood before him, his
hand prints will be captured forever, though in this exclusive Walk
of Fame Terry's immortalised paws won't have to share that's for
sure!

We would like to invite you to witness this joyous occasion on
Saturday the 1st (provisional time 12.30) which looks sure to
invigorate and butress the bond between Wincanton and Ankh-Morpork
as well as add a splash of sensation to the weekend! There will of
course be press in attendance to document the action and it's likely
that a few fans will be welcomed to provide a fitting back drop!

Those of you who are able to join us for the Cunning Artificers
Spring Event can expect the usual mix of silliness and jolity, food,
drinks, games and the chance to meet friends new and old, all in
true Discworldian tradition with of course Sir Terry in attendance
as our guest of honour.

Here we go Gathering Nuts in May Jolly japes and a Wedding Day. But
all is not as it seems, because the Theme of this May's Event is
"Lords and Ladies". And dear friends there will be Morris Men
(and Women) And the dread Stick and Bucket Dance will terrify the
natives. Get your glad rags on, bring a twist of ribbon, a bell or
two and come dancing.

'Friends, o friends, the Morris cometh this way,
On the 1st and 2nd of May,
So bring bell and whistle, cider and stick,
Drink and dance and make yourselves sick.
For to hew on the pavement, to hew on the lawn,
To thrash with the sticks from midnight til dawn,
Is to see the old ways walk again in the land,
Is to take once again, old Adam in hand.'

(B. Pearson)

This May-day weekend, we welcome the spring and celebrate the union
of two of Discworld's biggest fans with a Lords and Ladies themed
bash held at our shop and various fine watering holes of Wincanton.
Bring your ribbons, bells, and bladders on sticks and join us in our
jolly japes!

A spring feast will be available on Saturday evening with spaces
limited, and you can soon download a booking form or book your
places directly via the Discworld Emporium website.

Among the festivities will be a Strictly Come Morris contest - and
we need your participation! Teams of any size are welcome to take
part, and you can get your teams together via Facebook or our forum.
Failing that, you can simply turn up and get a Morris side together
during the 'Gathering of the Morris' rehearsal session Saturday
morning at the Bear. There will be a thirst-quenching reward for all
those who partake! Dancers must be suitably attired and teams must
provide and utilise one of the following accoutrements: stick, hoop,
bucket or hanky. The traditional roles within a Morris side --
Squire, foreman, bagman, ragman, beast and fool will also be taken
into consideration by the judges!

In the next week we'll post links to three set pieces of music
that will be available for you to perform to on the day, enabling
you to choreograph your dances in advance -- or you can simply show
up and wing it! If you make it to the final Dance-Off, you'll face
the steely judgement of our VIP panel with the chance of becoming
Strictly Come Morris champions!

For inspiration we've compiled a list of characters from Lords and
ladies to aid you in decorating your person/Morris team for the
occasion: Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg, Magrat, Verence, Shaun Ogg,
Pewsey Ogg, Herne the Hunted, Diamanda Tockley, Agnes/Perdita Nitt,
Amanita Device, Casanunda, Mr Brookes the bee-keeper, Hodgesaargh,
Ridcully, Ponder Stibbons, The Librarian, The Bursar, King and Queen
of the Elves, Mr Spriggins the Butler, Mrs Scorbic the Cook,
Sobriety Ogg, the Lancre Bridge Troll.

The Lancre Morris Men:
Bestiality Carter the Baker, Baker the Weaver, Tailor the Weaver,
Thatcher, OBADIAH Carpenter the Poacher, Jason Ogg, Tinker the
Tinker.

http://www.discworldemporium.com/pages/discworld-news.php


10.2 THE BROKEN DRUMMERS MAY MEET

The Broken Drummers is a London Discworld Group that
meets once a month on a Monday evening. Membership is free -- just
come along. New members and visitors to London are both welcome and
encouraged.

The next meeting will be on Monday 10th May at The Monkey Puzzle,
Paddington, London, W2 1JQ.

E-mail brokendrummers@...


10.3 DRUMMERS DOWN UNDER MAY MEET

The Drummers Downunder is the Sydney sister of the London Broken
Drummers.

They will have their next meeting on Monday 3rd May from 7pm at
Maloneys on the corner of Pitt & Goulburn Streets (across the road
from World Square), Sydney, Australia. Visitors to Sydney are also
very welcome.

For more information please contact Sim Lauren
simlauren@...

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

11) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS AND REVIEWS

11.1 MORT IN DUBLIN

Where: Player's Theater, Trinity College, Dublin
When: 27th April- 1st May, 7.30pm nightly
Tickets: €10.00 - €12.00, on sale at Players Theatre Box Office
01-8962242

Mimesis Theatre Company proudly presents "MORT", a novel written by
Terry Pratchett and adapted for the stage by Stephen Briggs. It
tells the story of a young, awkward man who struggles to find an
apprenticeship suitable to his skills- or lack there of...until
DEATH shows up and offers him a job. Ushering souls into the next
world is not easy. Not easy at all...as MORT soon finds out.

http://tinyurl.com/28ckrl6


11.2 MASKERADE IN HOLBURY

Waterside Theatre Company will present their production of Maskerade
in May. The company, based at Holbury near Southampton in Hampshire,
have already staged three other Pratchett/Briggs Discworld plays and
won awards for all three.

When: 20th - 22nd May 2010
Venue: Waterside Theatre, Holbury

For more information, go to:
http://www.watersidetheatrecompany.talktalk.net/


11.3 MEN AT ARMS IN GALWAY

Men at Arms will be performed at Nun's Island Theatre in Galway in
Ireland on 28th and 29th May.

Performances start 8PM. Ticket price 12 euros (concession 10 euros).
Tickets can be purchased from Galway Arts Centre (091 565886) or on the
door.

[Note: the Galway Arts Centre's website, including its coming
attractions page for Nun's Island Theatre, does not list Men at Arms
at all, so be sure to check.]


11.4 WYRD SISTERS IN BEDFORD

The Country Players company will present their production of Wyrd
Sisters in May.

Where: The Place Theatre, Bradgate Road, Bedford
When: Tuesday, 23rd May to Saturday, 29th May
Time: Each performance kicks off at 7.30pm
Tickets: 7.50 GBP (6 GBP concession)
Tickets can be purchased at:
http://www.theplacebedford.org.uk/tickets.

http://www.countryplayers.org.uk


11.5 REVIEWS OF UNSEEN THEATRE'S UNSEEN ACADEMICALS

By Rod Lewis in Blaze:

"Like most of Stephen Briggs' adaptations of Pratchett's
stories, the script lends itself more to film than stage, however
director Pamela Munt has become quite adept at re-adapting his
scripts into shorter, tighter productions that are more suited to
the live medium. In this instance, she goes one step further,
extending the action over interval with a scripted fashion parade
for the first 40 patrons to arrive (the remaining audience can
choose to watch it on a monitor from the foyer). With David Good's
effective split-level set design, the play moves between scenes and
locations with nary a pause and Munt effectively avoids masking
problems with her large ensemble..."

http://tinyurl.com/22n29ag


By Stephen Davenport in Adelaide's Independent Weekly:

"Director Pamela Munt is wonderful at staging the epic and
ridiculous, and here she's at the top of her game as she has her
cast working their socks off to deliver an agreeable dramatisation.
This is her 25th Pratchett play and every one has been rewarding and
appreciated. Basically, an Unseen Theatre Company work is an event.
Paul messenger (Arch Chancellor Ridcully) and Philip Linton (the
Patrician) are both solid in their performances as two of Ankh
Morpork's most powerful men. Both are encumbered with tiresome
scene changes during the action. It's attempted quietly but not
exactly smoothly, so it's distracting to the audience. That said,
the entire ensemble has an engaging spirit and is at ease with its
material and surroundings..."

http://tinyurl.com/23socvs


By Howard Sumner in Australian Stage Online:

"Keeping the action on course Samm Blackmore never backed away from
her delightfully stern Glenda. Amanda Flynn playing Juliet had a
touch of Catherine Tate in her voice... Being a fly on the wall in
the wizards‚ boardroom was a treat, especially when you're spying
on the likes of Hugh O'Connor and Alistair Preece. Enough was done
by both actors to make you totally forget about that other school of
wizardry. An honourable mention goes to Paul Messenger as
Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully and the inventive fashion parade
during interval. But the night belonged to two actors in particular.
Mark Ormsby was a Cockney dynamo as Trev and Phillip Lineton, a now
familiar face on the Adelaide stage, as Lord Havelock Vetinari. Both
managed to deliver one liners with precision and maintained a strong
stage presence while allowing their fellow actors room to move,
which is a task for any actor at the Bakehouse..."

http://tinyurl.com/2gyswmr


11.6 REVIEW: GUARDS!GUARDS! IN ABERDEEN

By theatre blogger Louie Shaw, a review of the recent RGU RoGUEs
production:

"I'm a huge fan of Terry Pratchett's Discworld, and the RoGUES
have put a stellar performance of Wyrd Sisters by the same novelist
before... The stand out character had to be that of Lupine Wonse,
played by media studies student Rod Mackenzie... In the end, the
RoGUES are full of talent that managed to easily overcome both the
typical amdram lack of props and the dragon itself. One reason why
it seemed to gel well together is that Terry Pratchett works well as
a stage play..."

http://tinyurl.com/39oje7k

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

12) CONVENTION NEWS


12.1 DWCON 2010 UPDATES

The Monks of Cool are chilled to announce the Discworld Convention
2010 Guilds.

In keeping with this year's theme, Guild representation will be
divided between Ankh-Morpork and Bonk:

The Guild of Assassins
The Guild of Seamstresses
The Honourable Company of Journalists, Clackspersons and
Gossipmongers
The Guild of Historians, Teachers and Archaeological Knowitalls
The Reformed Athothiation of Thurgeonth, Igorth and Igorinath
The Missionaries, Proselytes and Botherers of Om
The Uberwald League of Temperance
The Bonk Operatic Society (twinned with the Dolly Sisters
Players)

In a couple of weeks, you will be invited to join one of these Guilds.
Note that you do not have to join the Guild to which you are invited.
You may join any or no Guild as you choose - the invitation serves as
a suggestion for those who cannot decide which Guild to join.

Much more information about the Guilds may be found on the Guild page:
https://www.dwcon.org/content/guilds

   - which will be updated with even more information as it becomes
available.

There is also a Google Group which you may join:
http://groups.google.com/group/dwcon_org_guilds

or you can email the Monks on monks@...

Be excellent.

-- Karen/hypatia


- From the Productions Team:

The Reduced Discworld Theatre Company wants to see you shiver with
antici ... pation as we proudly announce that the 2010 Discworld
Convention production will be the Rocky Horror Discworld Show!

By special request of Sir Terry Pratchett and with kind permission
from Richard O'Brien, we are pleased to present this special, one-off
performance.

This will be a Rocky Horror Show parody with Discworld characters.

Get ready for a once-in-a-lifetime experience that will thrill you,
chill you, and fulfil you!

https://www.dwcon.org/content/rockyhorror


12.2 AUSDWCON GATHERING A HEAD OF STEAM

The third Australian Discworld Convention will be held on 8th, 9th
and 10th April 2011 at the Penrith Panthers conference centre in
Penrith, NSW.

Keep checking in at http://ausdwcon.org/events for information as
the website will be updated gradually, and the draft list of events
has already been posted. Join the forums and get ready for the
upcoming Inter-Guild online Scavenger hunt.

Registration is now open at early bird prices, and a draft programme
of events has been added to the website.

Volunteers needed. Contact enquiries@... (no mimes - by
order of the Patrician). Want to help publicise this Convention in
your area? Contact publicity@...

Daily teaser tweets - follow @nullusanxietas3 on Twitter

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 2 -- continued on Part 3 of 4.
If you did not get all four parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- APRIL 2010 -- PART 3 OF 4 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 3 -- ...AND MORE, AND HOROSCOPE

13) PTERRY AND ALZHEIMER'S NEWS
14) NAC MAC FEEGLE FIGURINES: GOING, GOING...
15) PTERRY HELPS SAVE VILLAGE CHURCH
16) IMAGE OF THE MONTH: HUMOROUS VEGETABLES DEPARTMENT
17) TIM'S TURN AS TRYMON
18) DISCWORLD SCULPTURE WINS THE DAY IN IOWA
19) PRATCHETT BOOKS CAN LEAD TO LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT
20) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE MAR > AUG

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

13) PTERRY AND ALZHEIMER'S NEWS

13.1 NEW BBC INTERVIEW

Video extract from an interview by presenter Stephen Sackhur on the
BBC programme HARDtalk, in which Pterry discusses positive attitudes
and the maintaining of dignity by Alzheimer's sufferers:

http://tinyurl.com/25pmrhu

The programme is simultaneously signed for the hearing impaired. It
is fascinating to watch Pterry's spoken words translated into sign
language.


13.2 PRATCHETT BACKS LAUNCH OF ALZHEIMER'S SUFFERERS STUDY

An article in The Independent:

"Most people believe the ability to lead a full life stops when
Alzheimer's is diagnosed but a new study shows the reverse is true.
A poll of more than 2,000 members of the public found only one in
seven (13 per cent) believe somebody with dementia can have a good
quality of life at all stages of their condition... Author Sir Terry
Pratchett, who has posterior cortical atrophy, a rare form of
dementia, welcomed the launch of the study, My Name is Not Dementia.
He said: 'Dementia is undoubtedly a cruel and debilitating
condition. However, a diagnosis does not strip a person of their
identity. That person still has a voice and they deserve to be
heard. Dementia requires not just care but also understanding. We
have to learn to be good at it.'"

http://tinyurl.com/y6fmj79

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

14) NAC MAC FEEGLE FIGURINES: GOING, GOING...ALMOST GONE

PJSM Prints is offering the very last of their excellent "life-
sized" Nac Mac Feegle miniatures. Originally designed by Paul Kidby,
these figurines are all sale-priced at £9.99

Still a few available:

William the Gonnagle (175mm tall)
Big Yan (155mm tall)
Not-as-big-as-Medium-Sized-Jock-but-Bigger-than-Wee-Jock-Jock (165mm
tall)
Fion (160mm tall)
Hamish the Aviator (145mm tall)

Daft Wullie and Rob Anybody are now completely sold out, but Rob is
still available in bronze. See the page for details:

http://www.pjsmprints.com/feegles/index.html


[Note: Your (Acting) Editor has a William the Gonnagle figurine in
the desk front of him as he types and can confirm that these
figurines are very impressive and lifelike.]

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

15) PTERRY HELPS SAVE VILLAGE CHURCH

As reported in The Express (UK):

"Just 35ft long, 13th century St Martin's in Fifield Bavant, near
Salisbury, Wiltshire, is the second smallest church regularly used
for worship in England. Sir Terry, 61, said: 'I have never prayed in
it and doubtless never shall but St ­Martin's is a solace to the
soul. Some things are simply worth preserving. I could not stand by
and watch the place fall down. That would be sacrilege.'"

http://tinyurl.com/233fs85

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

16) HUMOROUS VEGETABLES DEPARTMENT (IMAGE OF THE MONTH)

This appeared on the blog site of famous biologist PZ Myers:

"I have a feeling this feature might turn into something like a
county fair on Discworld, where people bring in odd-shaped turnips
that have curiously titillating shapes when looked at just so..."

http://tinyurl.com/yyu8kh2

Quite a few Discworld references in the comments section, too.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

17) TIM'S TURN AS TRYMON

An article listing "top five performances" in Tim Curry's career
includes The Colour of Magic:

"Bringing life to maniacal wizard Trymon in Sky One's adaptation
of Terry Pratchett's Discworld series, Tim Curry delivered one of
his more memorable turns in 2008's Colour of Magic... Given the
right cast and a big enough budget, Pratchett's novels can be made
into truly magical television..."

http://tinyurl.com/2fmxsch

Includes a video extract from the film.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

18) DISCWORLD SCULPTURE WINS THE DAY IN IOWA

Young sculptor Dylan Vaugn has won an arts prize, Best of Show 3-D
art, for his vision of the Discworld:

"Vaugn spent virtually all of the school year in art class creating
the sculpture, using clay, paper, mirror, wire and paints. He was
one of more than a dozens Vinton-Shellsburg art students who placed
first, second or third in the annual WaMaC Art Fair..."

http://www.vintoniowa.org/News/article347.html

The full-sized photo of Dylan and his creation:
http://www.vintoniowa.org/images/pics/100_9811.jpg

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

19) PRATCHETT BOOKS CAN LEAD TO LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT

...at least if you're Malaysian journalist Ariel Pheh Pik Teng:

"I was strolling past shelves of books and scanning them for the
latest potential reads, when I remembered that I had yet to read
Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett... Gaiman is pretty
much the god of stories, as is Pratchett. So I headed for the
designated shelves with much vigour. I'd like to say that I took a
leaf out of romantic movies and books, walked up to him, said hello,
discussed our favourite Pratchett books, and together we adjourned
to the nearby cafe for coffee..."

http://tinyurl.com/2d9ehmj

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

20) THE NEW DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

by Fernando Magnifico

Hallo and buongiorno! The Lady Asterisk is not available this month,
for she has accidentally eaten one of Mr. Dibbler's pies. But do not
fear, my friends, for Fernando shall be your astrologer today!

My friends, Fernando knows that life is made up of a series of
events, or as the Morporkian proverb goes, "it is one damn thing
after another" (if you excuse Fernando's Quirmian). These things are
related to such factors as love, fortune, or money. Most of the
time, life is equally affected by many such factors, but sometimes
there is such a month as this, where you can expect your life to be
dominated by a single over-riding factor. This month the stars say
that all twelve of the signs have such a dominant factor shaping
your life, although a different one for each sign. Perhaps this will
be a single major event that bends all the other events around it,
or it may be a series of many little events all connected, but
whichever way, let Fernando show you the shape of your life for the
next month.

Ciao bella!

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Adamant Hedgehog  21 Mar - 20 Apr

Hoggers, this month the stars say that you can expect much in the
way of conflict and argument. You can expect to have the arguments
with your wife or husband, with your work mates, and even with the
random strangers you bump into walking down the street. And not just
the big arguments about who is the father of Doreen's bambino, or
whether or not investing your mam's entire rainy-day savings on a
three-card Onion when playing against somebody called Henry the Hat
was a good decision, but also the arguments over the little things
like whether you take two sugars in your tea or three. The words
"You lookin' at me, Jimmy?" may be said. But knowing what the
typical Hogger is like, Fernando knows that this will be just an
ordinary month for you.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Half-Eaten Sandwich  21 Apr - 21 May

Sandies, Fernando is happy for you, for the stars say that you will
experience much love this month! And not the very reasonably priced
sort from the Seamstresses, not that Fernando has anything against
reasonably priced love, but who does not prefer the free gifts?
Fernando reminds you though, do not forget the simple preventatives,
otherwise you may end up with the unexpected bambino, or worse, be
like Fernando's second cousin Joseph who ran away to sea after
getting *four* signorinas in the family way in one week.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Herne the Hunted  22 May - 21 Jun

Hernians, this month the stars say that you will be blessed with the
best of health, like Fernando's grandpapa Franco who was never sick
a day in his life, except once, when he drank an entire bottle of
Uncle Rafael's grappa for a bet and went blind for a week. Fernando
knows that good health makes the difference between happiness and
misery: it doesn't matter whether you are the king or the beggar,
the duke or the swineherd, if you don't have your health you will
never be happy. This is why Fernando always eats a big plate of
greens every day. And why he takes plenty of exercise "con molto
fuoco", especially when wearing the fig leaf.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Wizard's Staff and Knob  22 Jun - 22 Jul

Staffies, this is the month for fame! Whether you want it or not
(and Fernando knows that Staffies do not mind being the centre of
attention), you can expect your "15 minutes of fame", as they say,
although the stars say it will last closer to the three or four
weeks. For this short while, you will almost know what it is like to
be Fernando, with the small childrens following you down the street,
the young mens and womens desperate to be near you and touch you so
your greatness will rub off on them, and the old peoples to be
disapproving but secretly jealous of you. It is a heavy burden to
carry, my friends, the burden of being the centre of others' hopes
and fears and desires, so be glad that your fame lasts only the
short while. Do not be sad for Fernando, for his back is strong and
he is used to carrying this burden.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Bilious, God of Hangovers  23 Jul - 23 Aug

Bilians are no stranger to the feeling seedy, as they say, but this
month the stars say you can expect to crawl into the bed with a big
glass of hot lemon drink (and perhaps a splash or two of whiskey),
for this month holds various and divers illnesses. But do not be
afeared, for the stars say that it will not be serious. Perhaps
three splashes then. My friends, Fernando can let you into the
Brindisian secret cures for the common illnesses, as taught to him
when he was the young boy by his sainted mamma and his Auntie Maria.
For the claggies, a spoonful of turpentine and a charcoal biscuit,
and keep away from the open flames for at least two hours. For the
gryphon pox, you must bath in the cat's water, and Fernando does not
mean the cat's *drinking* water. And for the Eight-Year Itch,
Fernando knows that the sure-fire cure is bromide in the coffee or
tea.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

(Horoscope continues in Part 4)

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 3 -- continued on Part 4 of 4.
If you did not get all four parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- APRIL 2010 -- PART 4 OF 4 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 4 -- HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED, AND CLOSE

24) HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED  AUG > MAR
25) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

24) HOROSCOPE, CONTINUED

The Celestial Parsnip  24 Aug - 23 Sept

Snippies, this month the stars say that you will come into money.
The ways of the stars are mysterious, even to Fernando, but they are
very clear about this, trust Fernando on this, although they have
not said how much. Perhaps that dear Muntabian widow woman Mrs
Maria-Theresa Slug will finally send the money she has promised. Or
perhaps you will find a shilling in the gutter just when you need it
most. As Fernando's grandmama Angelina always says, "it doesn't
matter whether you are rich or poor, so long as you have money".
Just make sure you don't let the Revenoo find out.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Small Boring Group of Faint Stars  24 Sept - 23 Oct

Fernando knows that there are the two sorts of luck in the world.
There is the luck you have when the chamberpot is emptied in the
street just *after* you have passed by. And there is the other sort.
My Boring'un friends, the stars have said that this month you will
be having the other sort. For the next four weeks, you can expect to
have the bad luck: stepping in the dog doings, losing your wallet,
accidentally knocking over a drink belonging to somebody called
Slasher, and having Mrs Cake join your church. Fernando feels your
pain, but do not worry my friends, for the stars tell Fernando that
next month you will look back fondly at this one!

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Androgyna Majestis  24 Oct - 22 Nov

It is said that travel broadens the mind, which is why Fernando left
Brindisi and has spent many years travelling around the Disc. But
there is the other sort of travel, the travel that does not broaden
but in fact narrows the mind: the boring, soul-destroying travel
back and forth until you dig yourself a rut you can never escape
from. My friends, the stars say that this month you will travel, but
they do not say whether it will be you on a paddleship down the
Vieux River, or just you trudging down to the same pub every day at
exactly the same time for the same four pints of lager with the same
friends. (Not literally the same pints, you understand, although
Fernando has heard all the jokes about the recycled Morporkian
beers. But knowing about the certain class of Morporkian publican,
Fernando is not *completely* sure they are only the jokes.) Fernando
knows very well the comfort of having the routine, but do not be
like Fernando's old uncle Umberto who went to the same cafe each day
for a game of cards. One day the cafe caught fire, and he pushed his
way past the on-lookers and bucket-brigade, walked straight into the
flames and smoke, and sat down at a table. His last words were "It's
a bit warm today, I think I'll have an iced coffee instead of my
usual".

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Spoons, a.k.a. the Greater and Lesser Spoons,  23 Nov - 21 Dec

Fernando knows that the many things come in pairs: the mens and
womens, the sweet and the sour, the light and the dark. Spooners,
this month the stars have spoken, and you are paired with the
Staffies. For you, this is the month for infamy to their fame.
Fernando does not like to speak of these things, but he must, for
the stars will not be denied. Perhaps you will be infamous for being
the terrible murderer, like Jock the Mincer, or like the amok former
History Monk "Third Eye" Wu. Perhaps you will be caught on
iconograph in the course of a naughty act with Genua Hilty, the
notorious coaching-inn heiress, and have your image splashed across
the pages of Bu-Bubble. Try not to feel the enviousness towards the
much more fortunato Staffies, for someday the Turtle will turn and
then you can sneer at their misfortunes.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Hoki the Jokester  22 Dec - 20 Jan

Hokians, it is said that the Lady only gives the fixed amount of
luck in the Disc, and so for every piece of good fortune, somebody
must suffer the equivalente piece of bad fortune. If this is so,
then you should thank any Boring'uns you know (for Fernando knows
that you must never, ever thank the Lady for the good fortune), for
this month the stars say you will be having the good luck to their
bad. Now is the time to buy the lottery tickets, bet your shirt on
the dice, and press your luck with the ladies. Fernando is reminded
of his uncle Giovanni (the shoemaker, on Fernando's sainted mamma's
side of the family, not the other one) who once had the most
remarkable good luck. For nearly three weeks, every time he left the
house somebody would drop a flower pot out of a window, missing him
by inches. Eventually though, the City Watch caught Lupo the Mad
Flower Pot Murderer and took him away.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Rather Large Gazunda  21 Jan - 18 Feb

The small childrens of Brindisi sometimes tease their friends by
singing this piccolo nursery rhyme to them:

Harry and Sally sitting in a tree;
K-I-S-S-I-N-G
First comes love,
then comes marriage,
then comes the baby in the golden carriage!

only of course they sing it in the Brindisian, which is molto more
beautiful on the ears, but Fernando has translated it because he
knows that the Morporkians are not so good with the foreign
languages, unlike Fernando whose Morporkian is the flawless. But in
the real life love and marriage and bambino do not always follow in
this order, or even at all. (Just ask the mammas of cousin Joseph's
bambinos about the marriage. Or perhaps you should not, unless you
like to be yelled at.) And so it is for the Gazundians this month,
for the stars say that this is a good time for marriage, love being
entirely optional. Fernando understands that there are the molto
reasons for the marriage, apart from the love and bambinos. For the
kings and queens, there is the making of alliances. For the rich and
powerful, there is the cementing of businesses and consolidating of
power. For those who prefer the company of their own sex, there is
the camouflage and the avoiding of unpleasantness when visiting your
family. Even for the common folk, the marriage arrangement is like
the business alliance, with the division of labour and the tax
deductions. So do not be concerned my friends, for there are the
many good reasons for marriage, and if you are lucky, love or at
least affection will follow later.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Lesser Umbrage   19 Feb - 20 Mar

Umbragians, it is said that the more things change, the more they
stay the same. If this is true, then Fernando knows that means
that the more things stay the same, the more they change. Trust
Fernando on this, for he has studied the philosophy of the Ephebian
greats and knows what he is talking about. This month, you can
expect the many things to change. Perhaps you will get a new job, or
the new lover in your life, or simply change your hairstyle.
Fernando knows that back in Brindisi, moustaches are in fashion
again. And for the mens, the beard is popular again, especially the
style like the Ankh-Morpork Patrician wears. (Even though Fernando
can grow the most handsome beard, he owes it to the people to shave
his face so all can gaze upon his most wonderful manly chin.) This
is a month for change, so do not be afeared to experiment. Now is
the time to try that new Klatchian take-away around the corner, or
get that tattoo you have always wanted, or to tell your boss what to
do with his job.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

25) CLOSE

That brings the April issue to a close. See you next month, same
time, same place. Or maybe not, since regular WOSSNAME editor Annie
Mac might be here instead.

Remember, next month Going Postal finally hits our screens. More
news as it happens.

-- Steven D'Aprano, your Acting Editor

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 4.
If you did not get all four parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
MAY 2010 (Volume 13, Issue 5)
*********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a FREE publication for members of the worldwide
Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North
American Discworld Society and other continental groups. Are you a
member? Yes, if you sent in your name, country and e-mail address.
Are there any dues? No! As a member of the Klatchian Foreign Legion,
you'd only forget them...
*********************************************************************
Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
Editor Emeritus (retd): Joseph Schaumburger
News Editor: Fiona (not Bruce) Bruce
Newshounds: Vera, Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow
Staff Writers: Asti Osborn, Pitt the Elder, Steven D'Aprano
Convention Reporters: Mithtrethth Hania Ogg et al
Staff Technomancer: Jason Parlevliet
Book Reviews: Drusilla D'Afanguin
Puzzle Editor: Tiff
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
DW Horoscope: Lady Anaemia Asterisk, Fernando Magnifico
Emergency Staff: Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare
time)
Copyright 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

------------------------------------------------------------------------

INDEX:

====Part 1 -- ALL THE NEWS THAT FITS

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH
02) LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
03) UPDATE FROM THE MASTER
04) GOING POSTAL NEWS
05) PTERRY TAKES ON DOCTOR WHO

====Part 2 -- MORE NEWS AND SUCH

06) PTERRY ON DOCTOR WHO (CONTINUED)...
07) ...AND REVEALS THE SECRETS OF HIS SUCCESS
08) OUR FAVOURITE AUTHOR LENDS A HAND
09) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
10) SIR PTERRY AT WINCHESTER WRITERS' CONFERENCE
11) CONVENTION NEWS

====Part 3 -- ...AND MORE...

12) MOIST LIKES HIS PRATCHETT THE OLD-FASHIONED WAY
13) REVIEW: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS
14) NEW DISCWORLD MINIATURES FROM PJSM PRINTS
15) REVIEW: ONLY YOU CAN SAVE MANKIND (THE NOVEL)
16) UNSEEN UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE...ISH
17) GUILTY OF LIT-CRIT: PTERRY STUDIED IN PTEXAS
18) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
19) DISCWORLD VERSUS NEW TECHNOLOGY: NOT A WIN
20) ABP BITS
21) DISCWORLD GROUPS MEETING NEWS

====Part 4 --  WEIRD ALICE AND HOROSCOPE

22) WEIRD ALICE PRESENTS
23) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE, MAR > NOV

====Part 5 -- HOROSCOPE, LATE BREAKING NEWS, AND CLOSE

24) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE, NOV > MAR
25) LATE BREAKING NEWS
26) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH

"I have to admit that I never, ever sit down and plan a novel."

-- Pterry, interviewed by Sky TV

"I've signed a contract for two more books after this one -- I don't
know if my health will actually survive that, but it's an act of
faith. I cannot conceive of not being a writer and not having a book
to do. And I've always said that if my PA or my wife finds me
slumped over the machine, what's the first thing they should do?
Save the work in progress!"

-- ...and interviewed in The Daily Mail

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

02) LETTER FROM THE EDITOR: SHE'S BAAAACK!

So, did you miss me, O Readers? (Don't answer that.)

First, I'd like to thank our brave Acting Editor, Steven D'Aprano,
for filling in so admirably for the past four months. I decided to
take a much needed break after several unbroken years of editorship
and some five years before that of providing main content every
month when WOSSNAME creator Joe Schaumburger was in charge; the idea
was for me to use the free time to work out some personal stuff
(mostly unsuccessfully) and improve my health (epic fail -- I fought
the chronic illness and the chronic illness won). But I do have to
say I'm glad to be back. It's an exciting time on the Pterry-culture
front, what with Going Postal about to air at last and with The
Author serving as editor of SFX Magazine.

So...it's historic moment time this month, as one iconic British
institution takes on another iconic British institution, aka Pterry
critiques Doctor Who. His opinion piece in SFX has ruffled more than
a few feathers in the young and old-school fan communities, but I
have to say that I agree with him. I've been a Who watcher since the
very beginning (and still am, and yes, I love the 21st century
version of the show beyond all measure), and I've been saying since
time out of mind that it isn't science fiction.

I've been debating this with Other Half recently; he insists that
anything with spaceships and futuristic technology in it
automatically qualifies it as science fiction, whereas my take is
that it's only science fiction if the science/technology is
believable (without, that is, the reader/viewer having to click
their heels together three times). But I do agree with him that
the term 'fantasy' -- which once simply meant 'fiction', by the way
-- has acquired too much contextual baggage these days and tends to
indicate the presence of magic or mythology. Therefore I've proposed
a new term: science fantasy.

The difference immediately becomes clear, in my opinion. The trouble
with Doctor Who as science fiction is that the 'science' is as
unscientific as an unscientific thing. The technologies in Doctor
Who can rarely-if-ever be traced to extrapolations from known
science; the technologies in, say, Firefly/Serenity, on the other
hand, are quite realistic for the most part (non-FTL space travel,
vastly advanced psychopharmacology, and I give it extra points for
noting the total lack of anything out there on the sentient life
scale except us, since that's probably true). Star Wars? Science
fantasy. Stargate? Science fiction, just barely. Star Trek? A little
of both, though leaning very strongly towards science fantasy.

I think a big problem with Doctor Who - science-fiction-wise - is
the lack of scientific credibility, combined with a lack of
technological consistency. As Pterry has pointed out, the sonic
screwdriver is nothing more than a barely-disguised magic wand, and
that's just the tip of the iceberg of daft unbelievable
pseudoscience in the show. Team Who does get some points for
gradually attempting to make Timelord physiology have some sort of
consistency, but for the most part DW is an ongoing series of
fantastical tall tales held together by the awesome persona of the
Doctor himself.

None of this changes the fact that I love the Whoniverse to bits and
always will :-)

But enough of that. On with the show!

-- Annie Mac, Editor

Edited to add: I've just discovered that Good Omens co-writer Neil
Gaiman -- who has written an episode for next season's Doctor Who --
agrees with me:

"'Doctor Who has never pretended to be hard science fiction,' Gaiman
said. 'At best Doctor Who is a fairytale, with fairytale logic about
this wonderful man in this big blue box who at the beginning of
every story lands somewhere where there is a problem...'"

To read the whole article, go to:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment_and_arts/10146657.stm

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

03) UPDATE FROM THE MASTER

UPDATE FROM THE MASTER...SORT OF

Here be Pterry's opening remarks as guest editor of issue 196 of SFX
Magazine (May 2010). Or rather, his opening opening remarks. To read
all of it, you'll have to buy the magazine -- which is full of
interesting articles chosen by the current editor:

"My first impression upon arriving at SFX Towers was that regular
editor Dave must have quite a cushy job because editing the mag
seems to consist of no more than drinking coffee and chatting about
Galaxy Quest. He gets paid for this? I just did it for the bacon
sarnie. But it was lovely meeting the SFX team who, on the whole,
looked more normal than you would expect. We talked through the
issue and I instantly shot the person who said that there should be
a Buffy retrospective, once was enough! And they obviously all love
their Doctor Who. I am in two minds about him, and you can read some
of my thoughts on the matter here on the website; but nevertheless I
was happy to agree to have Amy on the cover and an interview with
Karen Gillan. But fortunately I was able to persuade them to run
features on Blade Runner and my favourite PC game Oblivion: The
Elder Scrolls.

"You will also find a feature on the Mob Films adaptation of Going
Postal. I have to say that Mob are getting better at Discworld with
every movie. Sometimes they miss a detail, but they really make a
wonderful effort to get it right and the clacks system they built is
everything I could have hoped for. Unfortunately, the whole effect
is totally ruined by some amateur actor they allowed in at the last
minute. They did the same thing in the previous two. You are allowed
to boo him.

"This month kicks off SFX's three month celebration of SF in books.
I love SF and fantasy at the cinema and on TV, but we mustn't forget
the significance of written fiction. So starting this month the team
are going to include bonus features and interviews from the world of
literature.

"Look out for notes from me dotted throughout the issue, where I've
felt the need to stick my oar in and tell the team what they should
be doing. If you like what you read this month, it was down to me.
If you don't like what you see, then it was SFX's fault and you
should send your hate mail to the usual place. I do."


This extract originally published at SFX online:
http://www.sfx.co.uk/2010/05/05/terry-pratchett-introduces-sfx-196/

For a list and description of this issue's contents, go to:
http://www.sfx.co.uk/2010/04/30/sfx-issue-196/

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

04) GOING POSTAL -- AT LAST!

Going Postal, starring Richard Coyle, Claire Foy and Charles Dance,
is finally hitting the aether this week! The two-part film will be
broadcast on Sunday, 30th May, at 6pm (part 2 will be shown on 31st
May, presumably at the same time). This production may well be the
best Discworld film yet, so get ready for a magical good time!

Here be a fascinating interview with Pterry on the Sky One site:
http://sky1.sky.com/going-postal-sky1-hd-meets-terry-pratchett

(Also downloadable as an audio podcast)

...and one with Claire Foy, on being Adora Belle Dearheart:
http://sky1.sky.com/going-postal-claire-foy

Some Going Postal fan-extras, including the inimitable Pat Harkin,
discuss their filming experiences:
http://sky1.sky.com/going-postal-fans

Twitter users can send a clacks via the anternets from this page:
http://sky1.sky.com/Going-Postal-Twitter-Clacks

And there are free Going Postal wallpapers for your Hex:
http://sky1.sky.com/going-postal-wallpapers

WOSSNAME wishes Sky TV every success for bringing Going Postal to
our screens!

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

05) PTERRY TAKES ON THE DOCTOR...

...and everyone wins...mostly.

In his current capacity as guest editor of SFX Magazine, Sir
Pterry's first editorial was about the nature of Doctor Who -- the
character and the programme:

"A decent detective story provides you with enough tantalising
information to allow you to make a stab at a solution before the
famous detective struts his stuff in the library. Doctor Who
replaces this with speed, fast talking, and what appears to be that
wonderful element 'makeitupasyougalongeum'. I don't know about you,
but I don't think I would dare try to jump-start a spaceship that
looks like the Titanic by diving it into the atmosphere... but I
have to forgive the Doctor that, because it was hilariously funny...
People say Doctor Who is science fiction. At least people who don't
know what science fiction is, say that Doctor Who is science
fiction...

"And yet, I will watch again next week because it is pure
professionally-written entertainment, even if it helps sometimes if
you leave your brain on a hook by the door. It's funny, light-
hearted, knows when to use pathos and capable of wonderful
moments... when you've had your moan you have to admit that it is
very, very entertaining, with its heart in the right place, even if
its head is often in orbit around Jupiter. I just wish that it was
not classified as science fiction."

http://tinyurl.com/3aeystb


On BoingBoing, Cory Doctorow, who definitely *does* write science
fiction, says, "Writing in SFX Terry Pratchett explains why Doctor
Who, whatever its other merits, isn't very good science fiction. A
provocative hypothesis, but it's hard to argue with his reasoning."
The comments section is worth a shufti:

http://tinyurl.com/3yljut9


Another British icon, the vast and marvellous London bookshop
Foyles, says on its website, "The writer pointed out that Doctor Who
now concludes most episodes by resorting to the literary technique
of deus ex machina -- or an unexpected solution which arrives at the
last minute and resolves the story's problems with little
explanation. Despite his criticism, Pratchett admitted that he will
watch the show week after week as, once he ignores its flouting of
narrative conventions, he recognises moments of light-hearted, funny
and pathos-filled writing..."

http://tinyurl.com/3xlk5up

(This item continues in Part 2)

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 1, continued on Part 2 of 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME --MAY 2010 -- PART 2 OF 5 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 2 -- MORE NEWS AND SUCH

06) PTERRY ON DOCTOR WHO (CONTINUED)...
07) ...AND REVEALS THE SECRETS OF HIS SUCCESS
08) OUR FAVOURITE AUTHOR LENDS A HAND
09) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
10) SIR PTERRY AT WINCHESTER WRITERS' CONFERENCE
11) CONVENTION NEWS

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

06) PTERRY ON DOCTOR WHO (CONTINUED)

On io9, Charlie Jane Anders says, "though his criticisms are a wee
bit broad-brush, there's certainly at least a grain of truth to some
of them. (I've never quite heard the argument that the all-knowing,
ridiculously overwhelming Doctor himself is, in fact, a deus ex
machina.) Plus you have to love someone who stands up for the much-
overlooked and frequently amazing Star Cops."

Again, comments at the bottom of the page:

http://tinyurl.com/36xttsh

On media blogsite Unreality Shout, Gerard McGarry says, "But he does
continue to take the series to task for being labelled science
fiction. I'm not sure that's a label the series gave itself, but I
agree with the premise. Sometimes we do expect too much from Doctor
Who. And maybe it is better to leave your brain on a hook by the
door as he suggests than to try and think too deeply about it..."

http://tinyurl.com/2wwwgsq

The Guardian weighs in with a piece by Alison Flood, who says, "His
own creation of Discworld comprises a flat world balanced on the
back of four elephants, perched on the back of the giant turtle
Great A'Tuin, but despite his own inventiveness, Terry Pratchett has
accused Doctor Who of having 'ludicrous' storylines..." Mind you,
Flood doesn't appear to disagree, despite the provocative headline.

Includes comments:

http://tinyurl.com/22uftoa


...and here's Stephen Adams, in The Telegraph: "Pratchett, whose
make-believe Discworld is perched rather implausibly on the backs of
four elephants, said he wished Doctor Who was not classed as science
fiction...  He also found amusement in the way the Doctor had taken
on a saintly glow since his television resurrection. .."

http://tinyurl.com/2unl88k


In The Independent, Thomas Sutcliffe lauds Pterry's willingness to
critique and criticise: "But any serious fan should welcome
Pratchett's courage in having a crack at the BBC's most indulged
sacred cow. It's not that you have to agree with him that the
plotting is silly or the characterisation of the Doctor quasi-
religious in its devotion. It's just that it isn't good for any
long-running series to get nothing but praise. That's how they get
sloppy and complacent. The headlines that greeted Pratchett's fairly
innocuous remarks are a sign that criticism of it has almost become
a taboo. And I bet the next few scripts that get written are better
because he dared to break it..."

http://tinyurl.com/38uqp7d


Catriona Wightman on Digital Spy presents extracts from the
editorial:

http://tinyurl.com/3xbz98v


On First Post, Rachel Helyer Donaldson appears to miss the point,
saying, "In a case of one national treasure attacking another,
Pratchett has used his guest editing spot on this month's science
fiction magazine SFX to lambast Doctor Who for breaking 'most of the
laws of narrative'. Pratchett, who says he has been a fan of the
show since his youth, is most upset by what he sees as the BBC
scriptwriters' reliance on that hoary old literary device, the deus
ex machina -- an outside force that arrives inexplicably to solve a
problem. While the device gives writers the chance to introduce a
last-minute solution into a storyline to save the day -- not to
mention the plot -- Pratchett says it is ruining Doctor Who..."

The sole commenter on this wonders, as does your Editor, if
Donaldson read the same article as the rest of us...

http://tinyurl.com/26mzwz6


...while Emily Moulder, on Channelhopping, did understand what
Pterry meant: "Don't hate us but we're kind of with him on that
one. Although the Doctor's fast paced speech and his ability to
solve with something out of the blue is something we've grown to
love and except, it does seem to be the ending of almost every
episode..."

http://tinyurl.com/28sl5tb


On Love Reading, Mitchell Davids says, "Writing for SFX, Pratchett,
who has garnered a substantial international following for his
titles which include Only You Can Save Mankind, reveals that an
appointment with the time-travelling doc is one he somewhat
reluctantly makes each week. While he commends the show's
'professionally-written' script and 'wonderful moments', he claims
that it is by no means a work of science fiction..."

http://tinyurl.com/23hvcmh

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

07) THE SECRETS OF HIS SUCCESS

In an interview with Chris Hall of the Daily Mail, Pterry talks
about his principles for living and the important things he's
discovered over the years:

"Now that many schools don't have orchestras and don't sing, people
are missing opportunities to find out what they can be. Somewhere
out there in this country is a child who's probably now carrying a
hod on a building site because he's never put his hands on a piano.
I think once people know what they're capable of being, they become,
not a better person, but less likely to be an unpleasant one..."

http://tinyurl.com/24h2qd8

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

08) OUR FAVOURITE AUTHOR LENDS A HAND...PRINT

The website anorak.co.uk reports on Pterry's meet-and-greet in
Kingwell Rise in the lovely town of Wincanton, twinned with Ankh-
Morpork. With some fine iconographs! -- including one of an Irish
Discworld fan who not only shares my first name but also appears to
have nicked my favourite coloured contact lenses. I wondered where
they'd gone...

"Sir Terry Pratchett OBE was meeting fans of his Discworld books at
Kingwell Rise, the small Somerset town, which has Discworld-inspired
road names in keeping with the town's official twinning with the
fictional city of Ankh-Morpork. Pratchett left hand imprints and his
signature in concrete on a Hollywood style 'walk of fame'. These
books are the next big budget films -- just as soon as Hollywood has
some big budgets to spend. Go long on pointy ears -- you can't have
a big fantasy drama without the pointy ears..."

http://tinyurl.com/2vt234y

And here we have the Cunning Artificer's much more in-depth report
on the event, also addressing why being twinned with A-M is
important to the economy and civic life of Wincanton:

"...the housing developers, Taylor-Wimpey, asked the Discworld
Community to suggest suitable names for some of the streets in the
new development. Thus Hen and Chicken Fields, Treacle Mine Road and
others have now become part of the town's history. So as the first
phase of development was finished Taylor-Wimpey thought it a good
idea to have the occasion marked with a stone-laying ceremony...
over the years our Discworld folk have trickled in to the town in
their thousands from all over the world. Teachers, administrators,
bus conductors, doctors, nurses, lorry drivers, lawyers, university
professors, housewives, husbands, wives, lovers, friends, friends of
friends and assorted children and pets. That they have spent serious
amounts of money in the pubs and shops goes without saying. That
they have donated money to a lot of local charities is less well
known and that includes The Balsam Centre, Church Tower, Health
Centre, Football Club, Cricket Club and skateboard park. It makes a
difference..."

http://tinyurl.com/3xv2gd7

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

09) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS

9.1 MASKERADE IN CAERPHILLY

The Caerphilly Players (UK) are presenting their production of
Maskerade this week.

When: Wednesday 26th May 2010 to Friday 28th May 2010
Where: Caerphilly Workmens Hall and Institute
20 Castle Street, Caerphilly CF83 1NY.
Time:Curtain up is 7:30pm
Tickets: £7 Adult, £5 Child, available on the door only.

For enquiries relating to joining or productions, email
info@...

http://www.caerphillyplayers.org/


9.2 MEN AT ARMS IN GALWAY: A REMINDER

The Stephen Briggs adaptation of Men At Arms, directed by Alex Perry
and produced by Maria Anastacia Keogh, will be performed by Croi8
productions at the Nuns Island Theatre on Friday May 28 and Saturday
29 at 8pm.

Tickets are €12/€10 concession and are available from the Galway
Arts Centre (091 565886) or on the door.

The royalties to stage this play will be given to the Orangutan
Foundation.

http://www.advertiser.ie/galway/article/26358


9.3 WYRD SISTERS IN BEDFORD: A REMINDER

The Country Players company will present their production of Wyrd
Sisters in May.

Where: The Place Theatre, Bradgate Road, Bedford
When: Tuesday, 23rd May to Saturday, 29th May
Time: Each performance kicks off at 7.30pm
Tickets: 7.50 GBP (6 GBP concession)
Tickets can be purchased at:
http://www.theplacebedford.org.uk/tickets.

http://www.countryplayers.org.uk


9.4 DISCWORLD VERSUS SHAKESPEARE: WYRD SISTERS IN DUBLIN

The Dublin Shakespeare Festival 2010 is coming, and there's a
special Discworld feature on!

Du Players will be performing scenes from Terry Pratchett's Wyrd
Sisters as part of the Festival. Performances will take place at St.
Stephens Green at 2pm on Monday 7th of June and The GMB, Trinity
College Dublin at 2pm on Tuesday the 8th.

There will be a different selection of scenes each day, so come
along on both days for maximum Wyrd fun!


9.5 WYRD SISTERS IN BRAINTREE

The Braintree Dramatic Society of Braintree, Essex (UK) are holding
auditions for a production later this year of Wyrd Sisters.

Rachel, of the Braintree Dramatic Society, says:
"I'm  hoping to bring the story of Granny et al to life - with a
tiny budget, lots of enthusiasm and a few small personal touches! I
would like to invite anyone who is interested in having a part, big
or small, to our auditions. They will be held on the 26th and 29th
of July at 8.00 o'clock. Anybody wishing to join us will have to be
able to attend evening rehearsals at least once a week (twice for
bigger parts) on Mondays and/or Thursdays in Braintree. Anybody
wishing to help behind the scenes, from costume making to props,
will be gratefully received. I will make the firm details of the
production dates available to you all as soon as I know for anyone
interested in seeing it."

www.braintreedramaticsociety.co.uk

Or email Rachel directly at rayj6@...

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

10) SIR PTERRY AT WINCHESTER

As mentioned last month, Sir Pterry will be the keynote speaker at
the prestigious Winchester Writers' Conference in late June. The
conference runs from 25th-27th June, with writing workshops from
28th June-2nd July. The conference promises "Carol Ann Duffy, Poet
Laureate, and Robert Goddard, renowned author of more than 20
books... lead the glittering line-up of 65 authors, poets,
playwrights, producers, literary agents, commissioning editors and
industry specialists who dedicate themselves to supporting fledgling
and published writers at this international event."

http://www.writersconference.co.uk/

His talk will be titled Why Are You Listening To Me When You Should
be at Home Writing? Also, apparently Pterry has won -- among his
many other awards -- the Smarties Prize Silver Award. Why were we
not told? And did he get lots and lots of choccies?

http://tinyurl.com/37rckjg

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

11) CONVENTION NEWS

11.1 NADWCON 2 NEWS

It's time to air out your tourist shirt and start saving those
rhinu! The 2011 North American Discworld Convention is on the way!
With Guest of Honor Sir Terry Pratchett and much, much more,
Madison, Wisconsin is the place where all the magic will be
happening from July 7-12, 2011, at the Madison Concourse Hotel and
Governor's Club. More details on the 2011 convention will be
announced shortly, so stay tuned!

Among the several reasons the Guild feels confident that Madison
will put on a stupendous NADWCon are the enthusiasm, convention
experience, and love of all things Discworld exhibited in their bid
proposal. So congratulations to Madison! We look forward to seeing
great things from them.

Over the next few weeks the Guild will be working closely with
Madison's committee to pass along information, resources, and advice
to help them in their convention plans, and I know that they have
already set to work on putting those plans in motion...

Thanks again to Seattle for their interest and enthusiasm in hosting
an NADWCon, and we hope to see that interest again when it comes
time for 2013 convention proposals.

Cheers to all, and see you in Madison in 2011!

Emily S. Whitten
Chair
The Guild of Chelonavigators


To see the original, longer announcement, go to:
http://www.pjsmprints.com/news/index.html


11.2 AUSDWCON 2011: WATCH THIS SPACE, MATE

The third Australian Discworld Convention will be held on 8th, 9th
and 10th April 2011 at the Penrith Panthers conference centre in
Penrith, NSW.

Keep checking in at http://ausdwcon.org/events for information as
the website will be updated gradually, and the draft list of events
has already been posted. Join the forums and get ready for the
upcoming Inter-Guild online Scavenger hunt.

Registration is now open at early bird prices, and a draft programme
of events has been added to the website.

Volunteers are needed! Contact enquiries@... (no mimes --
by order of the Patrician).

Want to help publicise this Convention in your area? Contact
publicity@...

For daily teaser tweets, follow @nullusanxietas3 on Twitter

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 2 -- continued on Part 3 of 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- MAY 2010 -- PART 4 OF 5 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 4 -- WEIRD ALICE AND HOROSCOPE

22) WEIRD ALICE PRESENTS
23) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE, MAR > NOV

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

22) WEIRD ALICE PRESENTS...

GEEK BY NATURE (a song of Mr Nutt)

"I'm a geek
Excuse me?
What you say to me?
Oh no you didn't
No I'm not
I'm sorry but you know
I ain't that kind of Orc..."

Look at me and see a goblin child inside my skin
I'm an Uberwaldean, oh
So don't be tryin' to be stirrin' up hate for grey me
My Lady taught me, 'Better yourself
'The more you evolve
'The better for all...'

I'm about the fantastical
Ex-visceral
Not eatin' your babies
You can see I'm responsible
Though I could kill
If you sting the Orc in me

Aah, I'm a geek by nature
UU should beware, danger
Aah, I'm an Orc, but stranger
I'm a geek
Come on yeah
I'm a geek by nature

I'm a little athletical, got gloing gloing
My elocution's great, yeah
But there's a demon dark in me
That's warlike, crafted in the past
Just 'cause I like readin' books arcane
Doesn't mean I can't kick goals with your brain

I'm aware of the magical
Not tragical
I got the girl -- yay me!
If you open a monster's thoughts
Defend yourself
'Cause the rules will be changin'

Aah, geek by nature, yeah
UU should beware, danger
Aah, I'm an Orc, but stranger
I'm a geek
(Ooh yeah)
I'm a geek by nature

Freaky geeky footy-technique-y
Dangerous, so don't hoodwink me
Knowledge-drinkin', I've been thinkin'
Culture-bomb in Glenda's kitchen
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
~ahem~ Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Yeah, I'm a bit philosophical
Won't crush your skull
Nutt's peaceable (maybe...)
If you open a can of Orcs
Extend yourself
'Cause the rules will be changin'

Aah, geek by nature, yeah
UU should beware, danger
Aah, I'm an Orc, but stranger
I'm a geek
I'm a geek by nature

Aah, geek by nature, yeah
UU should beware, danger
Aah, I'm an Orc, but stranger
I'm a geek
I'm a geek by nature
Oh, that's geeky enough for me

For the original lyrics to Freak of Nature by Anastacia, go to:
http://www.uulyrics.com/music/anastacia/song-freak-of-nature/
or http://tinyurl.com/28fnmqw

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

23) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

[Editor's note: our esteemed astrologer, Fernando of Brindisi, seems
to have mysteriously disappeared. But when I asked Shortshanks the
printer what to do with all that unfilled space, he sniffed and said
anyone can cast a horoscope, even a 14-year-old boy called Kevin. So
I found a 14-year-old boy called Kevin who said he could do it
because he's "good at stars". At least he delivered on time, even if
the pages were a bit greasy.]


THE NEW DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

by Kevin

Um, hi. My name is Kevin and Im your astrolager for the month. Ive
casted lots of horroscopes before. Realy I have. Me and my best mate
Zapp, one time we cast horascopes for the whole neighbrhood and a
couple of them were almost right, so I know what Im doing.
Everything we do is written in the stars, see, even the whole
future. So its importent to know what your stars say and listen to
them. I know, thats kinda wierd, cos stars dont talk. But trust me,
Im a strologer and I know lots of aincent wisdom of the stars, okay?
So this is your stars for this month.

p.s. Hes realy called Reginald but he wants to be a wizrd so he
gets upset if I dont call him Zapp, on account of its his wizrd
name. Not like he can do magic but he says its just not yet cos he
has to go to that Unsene Universaty first.

p.p.s. I know lots of stars.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Adamant Hedgehog  21 Mar - 20 Apr

Hedgehogs, your horra-, horor-, your stars for this month say you
will exsel at sports. That could be all kinds of sports, you know,
football or running or jumping or troll teasing or tofu fighting,
but most of all football because football is the coolest sport, I
mean its totaly sick. You know what I wish I had for playing
football? Shorts made of that micromail stuff, thats what. They say
it pertects you against everything and you can get kicked in the
goolies and it wont hurt, at least it wont hurt YOU. I say what
could be better than that, huh? But maybe you want to be in some
other kind of sport and thats all right because youll exsel at that
too. This month the stars give you extra special sports powers and
youll win at everything and get trophys and stuff. But watch out,
they also say you might meet a tall dark stranger with no teeth whos
playing for the oposishun and if hes a Hedgehog hell have special
sports powers too.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Half-Eaten Sandwich  21 Apr - 21 May

Sandwichers, acording to your stars you need to go outdoors a lot
this month. This is good for health, at least thats what my teacher
Miss Rivett says when she wants me and Zapp out of her hair.
Outdoors you can find healthy sunshine and all sorts of cool stuff,
like cans to kick and girls pigtails to pull and you might even find
your very own tosheroon if you know where to look. One time I found
this neat rock with residjul magic in it, Mr Gritz the stone mason
said he thot it came from all the way in the Ramtops mountains where
everything has residjul magic in it, anyway it glowed in the dark
and there was sparks coming off it. I gave it to my granddad and it
made his teeth fall out. So there you go, going outdoors is eksiting
and edjucashunal. Those stars are realy smart.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Herne the Hunted  22 May - 21 Jun

Hernians, I see your stars say this is a good month for cleaning. I
dont think any month is good for cleaning but thats what they say
here. Thats pretty stupid, isnt it? My mum is always on at me
about cleaning my room, I dont see why I have to clean my room, if
I did then how would I be able to find anything? She says its a pit
of niquity, whatever niquity is, and that the old pizza crusts under
my bed are a breedin ground for plague. But everybody knows plague
comes from evil sorcerrs and anyway you never know when you might
be hungry in the middle of the night and a pizza crust could totaly
save your life. So maybe you should just move a couple of dirty
socks around and pretend its cleaning so the stars will be fooled.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Wizard's Staff and Knob  22 Jun - 22 Jul

This month the stars say you should go exploring. You know, like one
of those famous explorers like Howondaland Smith. You get to wear a
really cool hat and fight savages with spears for old tresure with
a curs on it and ride the wild stepps with barbarians wearing
jewelld sandals and stuff like that. But all the really neat places
are far away, like BangBangDuc and Agatea and Quirm, and it costs
lots of money to get a boat to there so instead you can go explore
something local like an old quarry. Or a dwarf mine shaft. I hear
theres lots of gold left over in those dwarf mine shafts, like
anything in the rocks thats over three feet high, but watch out cos
if they catch you theyll chop your ankles off with their gold axes.
Maybe the quarry is a better idea.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Bilious, God of Hangovers  23 Jul - 23 Aug

Biliousans, this month the stars say you ogth, ougth, um, they say
you shuld consentrate more on food instead of drinks. So maybe
youll learn to cook. I know cooking is for girls but sometimes its
fun to make a mess in the kitchen and if your realy lucky you can
eat it too without your mum having to call the pothacary afterwards.
Theres some good ressipis you can make, like nuckle sandwichs. My
mum makes great nuckle sandwichs. But watch out for the other kind
of nuckle sandwich, thats the kind Bruto Wiggins on the next block
always says hes going to give me but I always run too fast for him
to give me one. Zapp knows this neat ressapy for beef dripping cake
with speshal green icing, we made it one time and the icing ate
through his mums best saucepan. That was totaly evil. So thats what
the stars say, if you lern to cook then all that Biliusy alkahol
wont melt your stomack like Zapps mums saucepan.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Celestial Parsnip  24 Aug - 23 Sept

This is a good month for Snippers to be helpful. That means, like
helping people. Like if you see a little old lady on the kurb and
she cant cross the street cos theres too many carts, you take her
arm and help her a cross. I tried to help a little old lady a cross
the street once but she didnt like it, she said I was asalting her
and she bashed me with her umbrela and it didnt half hurt. You have
to watch out for little old ladies, they can be dangerus.
Dangerouse. You know. Maybe you shuld help the orfans instead. There
was an orfan in our class last year, Miss Rivett said we had to be
kind to her because she had no mum and dad, but she was a horrable
thing and anyway she was a girl and girls dont count. I know, you
could help rich people a cross the street cos then they might give
you money. See, the stars are good for useful stuff.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Small Boring Group of Faint Stars  24 Sept - 23 Oct

This is great news for you Boring peopul, see the stars say you
should make lots of time for playing games. Isnt that the neatest
horascope ever? I like games, I dont mean hop skip or kick the can,
but okay knock a dolly is fun espeshly when old man Bottomly answers
the door with his big red face and he cant catch you cos hes too old
and fat so he shakes his walking stick at you. But whats best realy
is the good games like Dragon Smackdown, you know the latest vershun
with the full couler cards and the king Dragon has detachabul claws,
how good is that it's like totally sick. Also you can play games by
the clacks these days, people play chess by clacks. I dont like
chess though, its too boring and nobody gets killd. But I think
Dragon Smackdown is best for you Boring peopul cos even thogh its
exsiting its perfeckly safe and you never get killd for real.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Androgyna Majestis  24 Oct - 22 Nov

The stars this month say your suppose to atend to social stuff,
thats like going to partys or just hanging out with your mates. You
can make a tree house if you live in a place with trees and then
have secrit meetings in it, or if you live in a narly boring place
like Dolly Sisters you can meet up with your mates and go out
painting graffitty on walls and stuff. Or if your like old you can
have tea partys and sewing circles, thats what my mum does, she goes
to sewing circles but she never brings home anything circuler so I
dont know why she calls it that. Social stuff also means going to
dances and what they call swarees or mabye thats sorrys, its a Quirm
word so I dont know how to spell it but who cares cos you see going
to those things means hanging out with girls and not even pulling
their hair. Ew, girls. Why would anyone want to hang around with
girls even if the stars say so? Zapps sister Brenda says in a couple
of years girls is all Ill think about. I hope I die before then.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 4 -- continued on Part 5 of 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- MAY 2010 -- PART 3 OF 5 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 3 -- ...AND MORE...

12) MOIST LIKES HIS PRATCHETT THE OLD-FASHIONED WAY
13) REVIEW: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS
14) NEW DISCWORLD MINIATURES FROM PJSM PRINTS
15) REVIEW: ONLY YOU CAN SAVE MANKIND (THE NOVEL)
16) UNSEEN UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE...ISH
17) GUILTY OF LIT-CRIT: PTERRY STUDIED IN PTEXAS
18) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
19) DISCWORLD VERSUS NEW TECHNOLOGY: NOT A WIN
20) ABP BITS
21) DISCWORLD GROUPS MEETING NEWS

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

12) MOIST LIKES HIS PRATCHETT THE OLD-FASHIONED WAY

Richard Coyle, who stars as Moist von Lipwig in the about-to-be-
aired telefilm of Going Postal, was already a fan of the Discworld
series:

"I think [Pratchett] has a huge amount of respect for the old-
fashioned way of doing things and I think people respond to that. I
think he's concerned with finding the soul, like I said that's
Moist's journey, but I think he does look for the soul in Mr
Everyman and I think we've lost a bit of that in our society, we're
losing a bit of community I think, and he's concerned with those
things that we've all cherished for so many years."

http://tinyurl.com/23mgnpd

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

13) REVIEW: UNSEEN ACADEMICALS

In The Star Online, a well-crafted review by journalist Terence Toh:

"Weaving a light-hearted, touching tale in his inimitable style and
mercilessly parodying everything from The Da Vinci Code and dark
fantasy clichés to former Argentinian football ace Diego Maradona,
Pratchett gives us a breezy, enjoyable read in Unseen Academicals,
which touches on the power of sport, and how it can bring people
together and change the world... As expected, the writing style is
remarkable. Pratchett delivers witty line after witty line with
great aplomb, only slowing down a little towards the end of the
novel, but still managing to engross the reader throughout... While
some might complain that this novel relies more on recurring jokes
and repeated lines than other books in the series, I still found the
humour delightful..."

http://tinyurl.com/2b5qg66

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

14) NEW DISCWORLD MINIATURES FROM PJSM PRINTS

The latest Discworld miniatures on offer from PJSM Prints include a
timely one: Moist von Lipwig in his Postmaster's winged hat.

All miniatures offered below are 30mm scale, high quality, metal
cast. Each kit is provided with a 30mm round plastic base and will
require preparation, assembly and painting.

Moist von Lipwig £8.00
Detritus and his siege crossbow £32.50
CMOT Dibbler £7.50
Death (on motorcycle) £16.00

For more details and to order:
http://www.pjsmprints.com/miniatures/index.html

For painting tips and advice, go to:
www.coolminiornot.com/article

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

15) REVIEW: ONLY YOU CAN SAVE MANKIND (THE NOVEL)

A fine, thoughtful review at blogcritics.org by author-to-be Jessica
Lada, who has just achieved her Master's degree in Professional
Writing:

"I didn't have a good reason for avoiding it except that the cover
says 'Terry Pratchett' but has a space ship rather than an ogre or a
wizard or Death on it. Now I can safely say this book is a perfect
reason why authors shouldn't be pigeon-holed. Pratchett doesn't just
write satirical fantasy for adults featuring bumbling wizards and
trolls whose knuckles make bink-bink noises. He also writes
children's books about video games and aliens, and he pulls it off
splendidly... This novel reminded me how great Pratchett is at
creating distinct and vivid characters in a very efficient way. He
isn't just fantastically funny; he also tells really well-crafted
stories that poke at your emotions and vices in just the right
way..."

http://tinyurl.com/294edca

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

16) UNSEEN UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE...ISH

Livemint Blogs, a division of the Wall Street Journal, runs a weekly
book quiz. Quiz number 46 was Discworld-themed; it went down very
well, and the quizmaster was apparently surprised at how subject-
knowledgeable the readers were. Having seen the questions, your
Editor is of the opinion that *any* WOSSNAME reader could have
answered them correctly without even blinking, but here, judge for
yourselves...

The questions:
http://tinyurl.com/326ukf4

The answers:
http://tinyurl.com/376ss7p

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

17) GUILTY OF LIT-CRIT: PTERRY STUDIED IN PTEXAS

The Texas A&M university is offering a course in vampire-themed
literature this year:

"Beginning fall 2010, the English department will offer English 485
and English 585. The fall 2010 Forms and Genres classes, which will
be taught by Dr. Robin Anne Reid, will focus on vampire narratives.
These classes will go beyond literature and also focus on vampire
poetry, prose, television and film. In addition to in-class reading,
there will also be online content for students to study... the
classes incorporate a wider range of literature than just
'Twilight,' although Meyer's novel is one of the required texts.
Other class texts include 'Tantalize' by Cynthia Leitich Smith,
'Carpe Jugulum' by Terry Pratchett and 'Fledgling' by Octavia E.
Butler..."

http://tinyurl.com/25hvagn

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

18) IMAGES OF THE MONTH

Some excellent iconographs from last year's Unseen Academicals
promotional football match in Wincanton:

http://www.between-the-lines.co.uk/?p=597

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

19) DISCWORLD VERSUS NEW TECHNOLOGY: NOT A WIN

Blogger Joseph Bottum loves Terry Pratchett's novels, but hates the
infamous Kindle e-reader. In a long, impassioned diatribe liberally
peppered with appropriate Pratchett quotations, he tells us why:

"I think my wife's idea was that, since the Kindle editions are
always a dollar or so cheaper, in a year or two, the Kindle would
have paid for itself. Assuming that we would keep buying that many
books. And assuming we found the Kindle a good substitute. But the
text is simply a disaster. It's like reading the old ASCII files
of Project Gutenberg online: You could do it, if you really had to,
but your eyes typically went on strike somewhere in the first half
hour... I downloaded Terry Pratchett's last book, Unseen
Academicals... And it was horrible. Oh, I read the book, since I
was, you know, desperate, but the experience was again as
disappointing as reading a Terry Pratchett novel could possibly be.
And here's an easy illustration of why: A good number of the best
lines in his work are at the bottom of the page; he employs
footnotes as a comic device, and THE FOOTNOTES WEREN'T AT THE BOTTOM
OF THE PAGE. Gone. Lost. Astray. Man, I hate the Kindle."

http://www.firstthings.com/blogs/firstthoughts/2010/05/05/kindling/

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

20) ABP BITS

20.1 THE MYSTERIES OF AMAZON

Okay, Amazon is currently claiming that this oft-cited next Tiffany
book has a publication date of 2nd September this year.

Is there any word from Pterry to confirm this, or is Amazon being
somewhat... speculative... again, like when they announced the
Sourcery screenplay was available for pre-order, and it turned out
The Mob wasn't even *doing*  Sourcery?

-- Dave

Amazon is listing a book for release in August, The Wee Free Men:
The Beginning (in the UK, Tiffany Aching and the Wee Free Men). Does
anyone know if this is a repackaging or Wee Free Men, or of related
material, an omnibus of WFM and HoS (it doesn't appear big enough
for that, at under 500 pages) or exactly what?

It's pretty clearly not I Shall Wear Midnight, which is scheduled
for the beginning of September in the UK and end of September in the
US. Also, Corgi is releasing WFM and HoS paperback editions in July
in the UK, which would be odd if this were an omnibus of them coming
out the following month.

-- William

Publishing is an odd business, full of people who do odd things. But
in this case, the explanation may be that the July editions are
published by  Corgi (Pterry's UK publisher) and the August version
by Transworld (Pterry's US publisher).

Then again, Amazon is even odder, and has been known to completely
make books up, apparently on the logic that they *ought* to exist.
(The 4th Edition Companion, for example, which they spent some time
in 2006 touting for the following September.) Don't believe in
anything that doesn't have a cover picture, that's my advice.

-- Dave

More of that Reader in Invisible Writings stuff, I suppose?

-- Chris Z

Not me gov...

Oh you mean TP's type of Invisible Writings. (Maybe Amazon has a
HEX* and is using it without knowing the limitations)

Mind you Douglas Adam's "Salmon of Doubt" was officially announced
several time but after his regrettable and early demise, only a few
fragments could be found across the hard discs of several Mac's.
They were, with other material, published for posterity under that
title, but very little in the way of a coherent story ever seems to
have existed, despite what the publishers probably advanced.

*I understand many people have wished a HEX on Amazon over the years
-- especially just before Christmas ;-)

-- Reader in Invisible Writings

Hey, I've just checked, and apparently The Complete Discworld
Companion is due in October 2011. And it *must* be true this time,
because they even know how many pages it has...

-- Dave


20.2 PTERRY AS TOLKIEN?

I am half way though LOTR. Although the language is undeniably
beautiful, JRRT does wax lyrical in  his descriptions of places and
things, but with enough style to keep your attention.

Contrast this with TP's writing which gives you the essential
outline of the thing and leaves you to paint the rest of the
picture.

On the other hand a certain JKR leans the other way.

So percentage wise "How long would LOTR be if it had been
written by TP?"

I would guess at about 60% .

-- Reader in Invisible Writings


I wouldn't disagree. I have noticed that one of PTerry's ways of
describing something is not to describe it but to describe the
effect it had on the characters present. Hence, to take an early
example, the two characters making bets about what had exploded in
the distant, burning  A-M. Instead of telling us it was full of
explosions, the characters discussed the explosions. The technique,
it seems to me, works very well -- getting the "audience" reaction
provides and extra layer of verisimilitude without the danger of
the prose becoming purple. Provided, of course, your characters are
themselves credible and interesting -- which applies to PTerry but
is not always the case.

Again, I just cannot see PTerry writing LOTR. Too much of it is
absolutes of black and white, and PTerry always has shades of grey
in his characters.

-- Alec

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

21) DISCWORLD GROUPS MEETING NEWS

BROKEN DRUMMERS JUNE MEET

The Broken Drummers is a London Discworld Group that meets once a
month on a Monday evening. Membership is free -- just come along to
The Monkey Puzzle, Paddington, London, W2 1JQ. New members and
visitors to London are both welcome and encouraged.

For the date of the next meeting, email brokendrummers@...


DRUMMERS DOWN UNDER JUNE MEET

The Drummers Downunder is the Sydney sister of the London Broken
Drummers. The next meet is on Monday, 7th June, at 7pm at Maloneys
on the corner of Pitt & Goulburn Streets (across the road from World
Square), Sydney, Australia. Visitors to Sydney are also very
welcome.

For more information, contact Sim
Lauren at simlauren@...

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 3 -- continued on Part 4 of 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

WOSSNAME -- MAY 2010 -- PART 5 OF 5 (continued)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

====Part 5 -- HOROSCOPE, LATE BREAKING NEWS, AND CLOSE

24) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE, NOV > MAR
25) LATE BREAKING NEWS
26) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

24) HOROSCOPE CONTINUED

The Spoons, a.k.a. the Greater and Lesser Spoons,  23 Nov - 21 Dec

This is a good month for sky gazing. You know, gazing at the sky.
Its better to do this at night cos if you gaze at the sky in the
daytime your eyes will get burnd. Besides, at night you can see
stars and shooting stars and other cool stuff like the arora, they
say its the reflection from Great Atuins eye what is called albino I
think. Some people use a telescope for sky gazing but if you go out
back where theres no lights and squint hard you can see stuff with
your naked eye. Eww, naked eyes. Anyway, if you sit realy quiet and
squint realy hard you might see something super cool like a wild
banshee in flight or maybe some witches on broomsticks. If you do
see a wild banshee though and you think its flying towards you, make
sure theres something you can dive under. Those claws are serious,
even worse than the claws on the Draco Nobbilus king Dragon in
Dragon Smackdown. I mean, SERIOUS claws. Better wear extra clothes
for pertecshun when you go sky gazing. The stars has spoken.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Hoki the Jokester  22 Dec - 20 Jan

Hokies, your stars say its the best month for learning stuff. Wow
you got the short straw on that one cos everybody knows that school
sux. But did you know theres ways to learn stuff without going to
school? You can read magazeans, theres lots of realy good magazeans
like Total Crossbows, Arms and Armer, Mersenary Monthly and even the
Times one, Great Battles of Histry what comes with mapps and
everything. Or if nobodys looking you can get books from the libary
like natural histry books about when the dinasaurs ruled the Disc.
Dinasaurs had huge big teeth and they could crunch up your head with
one bite, how totaly sick is that. Sometimes when nobodys looking I
get books from the libary cart that comes around. Miss Furbelow is
the libarian, shes okay even thogh I guess she was a girl once but
it doesnt matter cos shes old and has a beard. Zapp says the
libarian at the Unseene Universaty is a rangutan, thats some kind of
big monkey with fur all over but I bet Miss Furbelow has a better
beard than a rangutan does.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

The Rather Large Gazunda  21 Jan - 18 Feb

Hey you Gazunders, your stars say this month you have to save money
and theres lots of ways to do that but I spilld curry ketchup on
some of your chart so I dont know what they are. Sorry about that.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Lesser Umbrage   19 Feb - 20 Mar

This month the stars say is a good month to do crime. How lucky are
you that you wernt born as a Hokie, crime is way better than
learning stuff. This is a one month speshul offer, you dont even
have to join the Theifs Gild so go for it!!! Maybe you can rob a
realy big shop or even the royal Museem and the stars will pertect
you!!! But mabye not the Bank of Ankh-Morpork or the royal Mint cos
they have troll guards and you dont want to mess with trolls, I mean
troll teasing is one thing but if your robbing stuff then they get
realy mean. I heard about a theif what stole fire from the gods
once, it mustve been his lucky stars month too but then they caught
him and I think theres a bird that pecks his eyes out every day now.
You have to ask yourselfs is it worth it, Brendas budgie pecks my
hand sometimes and that realy hurts. Maybe youd be safer doing what
they call gentlemens crime, like stealing a dimond from a rich old
bat in the middle of the night cos most rich old ladys dont have
troll guards. Anyway I hope you have suxcess, and if you could steal
some micromail for me Id realy appresh- apprich- Id be realy glad.
So thats all the stars for this month, I bet you didnt think Id make
it all the way thrugh the zodiacs but I told you I was good at
stars. If you ever want me to do your persnal stars you can contact
me thrugh this magazean. But for persnal youll have to pay me a
dolar.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

25) LATE BREAKING NEWS

25.1 NATION: THE INDEPENDENT'S CHILDREN'S BOOK OF THE YEAR

Or rather, news that broke a whil,e ago but I got it late. How did
we miss this? Back in early January, The Independent named Nation as
its Children's Book of 2009:

"Does Nation merely count as a children's novel? As with Alice's
Adventures in Wonderland or Gulliver's Travels, delighted readers of
whatever age will swiftly cease to care. Here, Pratchett forsakes
his Discworld for a stand-alone fable of conquest, civilisation and
enlightenment ? with a bumper crop of gags on the way. In a slightly
twisted universe that parallels Europe's imperial past, shipwrecked
Daphne meets Mau, the last survivor of his nation, on the island
that his people used to inhabit before a tsunami. Mau must free
himself from the iron grip of traditional belief; Daphne, of the
shackles of race and class prejudice. Cue a wisely hilarious
excursion through ideas of community, identity and belonging, all
wrapped up in Pratchett's sublime silliness."

http://tinyurl.com/yd3r8ph


25.2 PTERRY VIDEO ON GOING POSTAL

I think we've already done this one, but here be a YouTube link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zae-Tq73pQ8&feature=youtube_gdata


25.3 ANDREW SACHS DISCOVERS THE DISCWORLD

Legendary actor Andrew "Manuel" Sachs, aka Junior Postman Groat, had
never read a Discworld novel until he got the part in Going Postal:

"I'd never read any of Sir Terry's books - once we got Going Postal,
I read that twice through before we tackled the script... Would I
ever read another book of his again? I probably would."

http://tinyurl.com/35sbawf

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

26) CLOSE

Finally, a fascinating little piece of resonant Roundworld history
sent by Dianne Hughes, a local historian in the Geelong area of up-
country Victoria, Fourecks:

"Years ago when I was researching the Steiglitz Cemetery, [at] a
goldfield north of Geelong, I found in the record a local midwife
called Nanny Ogg. She unfortunately met a sad end; one evening
returning home from visiting a case of sickness, I think a birth,
she had a bit to drink and accidentally fell into a disused mine
shaft. I did have hopes of her grave site having a plaque on it, as
I felt she deserved recognition for the amount of work she did in
this goldfield. I think from memory she appeared on a number of
birth and death certificates as being the person responsible for
nursing either at the birth or the death. I think once I stopped
researching in that area the cemetery trust and historical society
lost interest in poor old Nanny Ogg. She has been relegated to the
realms of history."

Nice one, Dianne! Good to know there's always a Nanny Ogg doing her
rounds somewhere in the multiverse ;-)

And that's all from us, and back to bed for me. Don't forget to
watch Going Postal, and we'll see you next month...

-- Annie Mac

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of Part 5.
If you did not get all five parts, write: interact@...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2010 by Klatchian Foreign Legion