No Thanksgiving Dinner

Tis the night before Thanksgiving and all through our house
No turkey is baking; I feel like a louse,
For I am all nestled, so snug in my bed;
I'm not gettin' up and I'm not bakin' bread.
No pies in my oven, no cranberry sauce
Cuz I give the orders, and I am the boss.
When out in the kitchen, there arose such a clatter
I almost got up to see what was the matter.
As I drew in my head and was tossing around
To the bed came my husband, he grimaced, he frowned.
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
He scared me to death and I thought, "Here he goes!"
He spoke not a word as he threw back my quilt
And the look that he gave was intended to wilt.
So up to the ceiling my pillows he threw
I knew I had had it, his face had turned blue.
"You prancer, you dodger, you're lazy, you vixen
Out yonder in kitchen, Thanksgiving you're fixin."
But he heard me explain, with my face in a pout:
"I'm just plain too tired and we're eating out!"

Contributed by: Mariane Holbrook via www.humormatters.com
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Bonus Funnies....

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't
find one big enough for her family. She asked the stock boy, "Do these turkeys
get any bigger?" The stock boy answered, "No ma'am, they're dead."

58 percent of Americans say Thanksgiving Day isn't complete without this. What
is it. It wasn't pumpkin pie, dressing, or cranberry sauce. It wasn't
Football, or pecan pie, or giblet gravy. 58 percent of Americans say
Thanksgiving Day isn't complete without a NAP! Betcha didn't see that one
coming?

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Thanksgiving Special

In the past we got a lot of comments about the story of Abraham Lincoln and his
declaration of a time of Thanksgiving during the Civil War. You can find it in
our archives.

A lot of folks like to trace the Thanksgiving Holiday we celebrate in the US
today back to the Pilgrims. However, some of the history that is Thanksgiving
Day was forged during a very difficult time. The fall of 1777 was a
particularly bleak time in American History. However, the founding fathers
still found time to give thanks to God.

For the full story go to http://online.wsj.com/article/SB122765806822958269.html
for the full story of what Thanksgiving is all about. You'll find a wonderful
article by Ira Stoll on the Wall Street Journal web site.

On another note, if you're cooking your traditional Thanksgiving Turkey and
having problems there are some great sources of help. Try
www.busycooks.about.com and look for Thanksgiving 101.

We're heading off to my sister's house for a family gathering Thursday.

Here's hoping your Thursday is one of true Thanksgiving.

Best,
Keith
The Sermon Fodder Guy