Great poem, very sensual, puts the reader into the action immediately with a hint of mystery that seems to refer to the blades of a fan without naming the fan....
Ever been somewhere you barely remember you had been? and then out of a clear sky it hits you between the eyes. You find yourself having the same "moment in...
Tell me what you think. I feel writing about this experience will me get past 8 years with this person. Burdens Life can be difficult, working with hard...
Dear Jan, I really like the feeling this poem gives me. It's haunting and nostalgic. I like the three lines that are set apart. I only have one small...
Hi Jan, You've written an interesting description of 'deja vu' and I like the comparison of the now and the then. The details take me there, into the...
Jan, In the first stanza, I like the line "At the Palace of Governors, Natives sell their heritage on the Porticos." If you are of the opinion that this is...
With Every Fall Some Rise We lost many brave and true In the towers' tragedy But lest you believe There are no worthy Left upon this earth A week later Ten...
Reminder from: PoetryWorks Yahoo! Group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/PoetryWorks/cal Gulf Coast Poets Critique Group Monday October 22, 2007 6:45 pm - 9:00 pm...
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Oct 18, 2007 11:48 pm
263
I like the title. It piques my imagination and leas me into something unexpected. I think you could expand this poem into several more stanzas with examples...
Reminder from: PoetryWorks Yahoo! Group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/PoetryWorks/cal Poetry Works Workshop Sunday November 4, 2007 3:45 pm - 7:45 pm (This...
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Oct 21, 2007 9:41 pm
265
In Shadow Hidden I. Search my heart and clear my mind. Entombed in darkness, condemned to look within I fear this night. Too hideous for eyes, a beast in...
I like the title. It communicates the fact that when hard times come, some rise to the occasion. After reading the poem, the title took on a deeper meaning for...
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PoetryWorks@yahoogrou...
Oct 27, 2007 9:43 pm
269
season now over warm Caribbean waters leave dunes still intact...
Hi Oscar, I like your haiku also. Nice description of nature. Well done! Becky Rebecca Hatcher Travis Find your own voice to add to the music of the earth~...
I like your haiku. The second and third lines are the strongest. They are concrete images. I'd like to see the first line be a little more visual. Still,...
Janice - I noticed this poem posted when I went back in my inbox. I did not see it come in on the day you posted it. You might resend it in case others had...
Janice, I like your poem very much. I especially like that you used all the senses: sight, sound, taste, etc. The part about ribbon candy takes me back to my...
Reminder from: PoetryWorks Yahoo! Group http://groups.yahoo.com/group/PoetryWorks/cal Poetry Works Workshops cancelled Sunday January 6, 2008 All Day Location:...
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Dec 27, 2007 6:06 am
279
Memory Mind wanders through crooked caves and ashes Holding onto grudges and dungeons where the soul lives Through vines and thorny underbrush, I trip and...
I really enjoy the imagery in this. Like many have noted, the poem is really full of all the senses and you really get a feel for what Christmas is all about....
Carol, Thanks for the feedback on the poem. I like the way your dad had you wait for the ribbon candy! That sounds like a fun tradition. I just found out I'm...
Because this is a mixed group of new and experienced poets please try to keep in mind that it's best to avoid just "telling" a poet what to change in a poem....
If it isn't too late to weigh in on this poem, I would like to say how much I enjoyed it! It's offers a wonderful collage of images and thoughts that bring...
Dear Elizabeth, I like your poem "Memory" very much. There are parts that make me feel a deep sadness for the past--like line 2 - 4. I like your use of the...
Midnight Cannonade It starts a rumbling from afar then something shakes and sometimes quivers as long guns are brought out and mortars fill the air with...
