This message is a reminder regarding the Mountain-Home policy on cross-posting. It is automatically sent to our community once a month. Poetry which you post...
Mountain-Home@yahoogr...
Dec 2, 2001 1:46 am
1925
Mountain-Home is a school of modern waka. Classical waka is the native poetry of Japan. For a thousand years, waka was the heart song of the Japanese people....
Mountain-Home@yahoogr...
Dec 2, 2001 1:46 am
1926
An autumn sunrise; In mist the pines retain Their darkness-- If my sad thoughts would vanish Into the rising whiteness. Donna...
... A good example of emotional depth, firmly ensconced in natural images. VERY interesting pivot. The upper verse stands well by itself. In the lower verse,...
Thank you very much for your comments, Kit. I think this one helps to show the difference between hokku and waka (in addition to conemporary tanka). Both hokku...
an'ya, I was OK with this until the last line. How can you integrate the last part into the rest of the waka in a stronger way? Eventhough it will give you an...
... Classical waka didn't employ end-rhyme, and I'm hesitant to innovate in this area. I'm glad to see other people are noticing crows. They are particularly ...
I think "such" is better. I would also suggest that last 2 lines be changed to something like "do deer too behold such beauty/on the journey of survival?" The ...
Kit, thanks for mentioning the rhyme -- I didn't do it purposely and only noticed it later. The question in my mind, and I wonder how you feel about this, is...
... I've done that before. Since it was in three places, though, I thought you'd done it on purpose. :-) ... Internal rhyme is going to happen. I think end...
Yes. Put the apostrophe in December's and you're set! Donna ... __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Buy the perfect holiday gifts...
How strange it is to feel summer returning so deep in autumn— the respite is far too brief to revive wizened branches. 71 degrees in Boston yesterday! ...
If I may put my 2 cents in. There are very few things that those who work in the modern and traditional camps agree about. One is not to use end rhyme. If you...
In a message dated 11/29/01 5:41:07 PM, dfer268@... writes: ... the mournful northern wind rising, falling-- the breath of my desire through the long...
In a message dated 12/2/01 2:18:31 PM, tactserv@... writes: << One Decembers eve, we marvel at a snow moon on the path worn home -- do deer too behold...
I would remove "too" and make it "do dear behold such beauty" which also nicely preserves the 7-syllable line which an'ya seems to be aiming at. This poem has...
In a message dated 12/3/01 3:15:33 PM, dfer268@... writes: << If I may put my 2 cents in. There are very few things that those who work in the modern and...
In a message dated 12/3/01 4:12:48 PM, Shin02143@... writes: << I seem to recall that the classical waka poets were insistent about avoiding rhyme *in...
... innovate in ... particularly ... about, ... What makes you think that they are arguing? We feed 5 crows every morning and enjoy them enormously. They are...
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