I've posted these at
http://www.greaterthings.com/Essays/Edward_the_Overly-Great/


PART II

I think I've hit on a big one here.

For those of you not familiar with Edward, do a quick Google search:
http://www.google.com/search?q=edward+twilight
19,300,000 results -- two thirds as many as a search for solar energy which
gives 31 million results.

I think it could be axiomatic to say essentially that porn is for a male what
romantic fantasy is for a female.

Some are able to dabble and not become addicts. Some are more prone to
addiction than others. Both probably stir up hormones in the body that are
similar or same to those stirred up by chemical addictions, resulting in altered
synapses that are medically referred to as "addictive".

One of the drivers of addiction in general is guilt and shame. So the females
don't get addicted as easily because society doesn't generally frown on romantic
fantasy, but typically views it as nominally harmless -- something that
certainly can't be said about porn.

In no way am I trying to let porn off the hook as being detrimental. The point
I'm making is that the female counterpart vice to porn is not porn, but romantic
fantasy media.

The purpose in drawing attention to this is to 1) enable women to be more
empathetic to what men struggle with, and 2) to point out that perhaps the
female attraction to romantic fantasy isn't so innocuous, but should perhaps be
viewed as an unhealthy counterfeit for a void they are feeling in their life;
and in extreme cases can become addictive.

Women tend to be unsympathetic with men's tendency to ogle where they shouldn't.
By realizing their own draw to romantic fantasy, perhaps they can realize the
pull, from a vantage point that they can relate to.

What's the difference between a woman crawling up to a Twilight novel for hours
and even days on end, letting housework and children go neglected; and a man
pouring over page after page of porn when he should be working or spending time
with his family? What's the difference between the female going back to such
novels time and again, and a man going back to his porn time and again? What's
the difference between a female thinking less of her woefully romantically
inadequate husband, and a man who is not as attracted to his
not-perfect-figure-wife as he is to the salacious images he has access to?

Both vices are unhealthy and lead to unlfulfillment and conflict in real
relationships that are based in the real world.

Sterling

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