The Fourth of May Mark Your Calender. A very important event is going to happen on May the 4th. I'm telling you so early because it's so important. I urge each...
The Fifth of May The 5th of May is a Mexican holiday, but its true origins are not well known. In the early 1900's, Hellman's Mayonnaise was manufactured in ...
Apologies for being late with this ... Conrad ______________________________________________________________ Q: What candy do you eat on the playground? A:...
Q: Why are husbands like lawn mowers? A: Because they're hard to get started, emit foul odors, and half the time they don't work. ... Q: What time did the duck...
Our dog refuses to drink plain tap water. I'm wondering if that's common for the Scottish Perrier breed? (Mike Bull's Pun of the Day) ... Inbred - Within a...
Thanks, Lynn! In the small Texas town of Mt. Vernon, the owner of Drummond's Bar began construction on a new building to increase his business. The local ...
Q: How do you make a cream puff? A: Chase it around the block ... Q: Why won't clams lend you money? A: They're shellfish ... Q: How do you make fruit punch? ...
"I worship the number 3.1415927," said Faith piously. ... Every time I take my toucan to the vet, I come back with a large bill. ... MONA LISA'S JEWISH MOTHER:...
Q: Why did the man wear a rabbit on his head? A: So nobody would harm a hare on his head. ... Q: Why do mummies make good employees? A They get all wrapped up...
Q: Which Knight makes pottery? A: Sir Amic. ... Q: Why did psychic always get clothes for her birthday? A: Because everybody knows she's a medium ... Q: What...
(This routine won Kirk Miller Punniest of Show at last weekend's O. Henry Pun-Off in Austin, TX) My father urged me to be a simple carpenter because carpenters...
Headline: Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy. (Mike Bull's Pun of the Day) ... Q: What vegetable should never be allowed on board ship? A: A...
(Thanks, Joe K.!) The Daily Tribune OBITUARIES EBERT WALTERS April 22, 2009 During his childhood, Ebert "Sonny" Walters was counseled by his tough old cowboy...
Q: Why did Mrs. Grape leave Mr. Grape? A: She was tired of raisin kids ... Q: What do you call a duck with a big bill? A: Poor ... Q: What did the skeleton buy...
It's a rather lengthy offering today, but many are repeats. Thanks to Joe K. for most of them! I will not be posting to the list on Monday due to the U.S....
That really nice fellow works in a clothing factory sewing zippers on jeans. That is good. He wouldn't hurt a fly. (Mike Bull's Pun of the Day) ... A suspect...
My Dream House by Henry Lynn In order to build my dream house atop a rocky hill I needed to find a real TOR. While browsing CRAG'S list I met an agent named...
Ramblings of a Retired Mind (thanks, Joe K.!) I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped onto their belt...
Hymie Goldstein owned a fleet of moving vans. He was devoted to his moving business, not only handling customers and keeping the books, but schlepping...
Q: Why were the times of King Arthur known as the Dark Ages? A: It was Knight time ... Q: Why is it so hard to find a good veterinarian for ducks? A: They're...
Q: Where in the newspaper do you look for reports of missing NASA satellites? A: The orbituaries. ... Q: What type of dog has no tail? A: A hot dog. ... Q:...
Q: Why is it bad to leave a book outside overnight? A: Because in the morning it will be overdew. ... When she saw the fire escape, the blonde firefighter...
"Good boy, good boy," the dog trainer muttered. (Mike Bull's Pun of the Day) ... Q: What do you call a necklace made out of vegetables? A: A food chain. ... Q:...
Country wisdom Don't name a pig you plan to eat. Country fences need to be horse high, pig tight, and bull strong. Life is not about how fast you run, or how...
Thanks, Lynn! The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot's wife looked back and turned into a pillar of salt, when little Jason interrupted. "My Mommy...
The blonde weatherman took a bar of soap to work because the forecast said showers. ... Two bedbugs got married. In the spring, of course. ... If a priest is...
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