Note from Conrad: Because Monday is a holiday in the U.S., I won't be posting to the list again until Tuesday. Have a good long weekend and you'll hear from me...
Lemon Drops by Pamela Jenkins It was late in the evening. I had just settled down in my rocking chair and put my feet up on the footstool. The cup of hot tea...
Woman to furniture saleman: "What I'm looking for is an upholstered footstool that's long and wide. " Salesman: "I don't think you're going to be able to find...
Dear Mom & Dad, Our Scoutmaster told us to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and are worried. We are okay. Only one of our tents and 2...
Thanks, Lynn! I, ____________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances...
A WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST: Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. Her boyfriend is on the cover of...
I will not post tomorrow, in honor of the anniversary of 9/11. ... Conrad __________________________________________________________________________ Detective...
A little boy was walking down a dirt road one Sunday afternoon when he he met a little girl going in the same direction. "Hello," said the little boy. "Hi,"...
Pig is talking to the devil Pig: So what remodeling work are you doing back home? Devil: We're paving the main road with this special asphalt made by Thomas...
I won't be posting to the list next week, because I'll be on vacation. Have a good week!! Conrad You Might be a Redneck if ... ... you missed 5th grade...
A sampling of the "best" Ruminations from the past week, courtesy of Chris White's Ruminations Web site, www.ruminate.com I think the unspeakable has probably...
"How is it that you never married?" "I just never met the right woman ... I guess I've been looking for the perfect girl." "Oh, come on now, surely you have...
A guy wakes up on a beach after having been shipwrecked. He quickly discovers that the sand is dark red. The dark red sky is peppered with dark red birds,...
In the early 1800's an old merchant had to go to Omaha on business. He presented himself to the stagecoach office and asked, "How much a ticket to Omaha?" The...
"Doctor, Doctor, you've gotta help me! My son swallowed a razor blade!" "Don't panic! I'm coming immediately! What have you done?" "Well, for one thing, I...
Notable Quotes "Radio has no future. Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible. X-rays will prove to be a hoax." - English scientist William Thomson,...
Bob and Carl are sitting on front porch admiring the sunset. Bob has a proud smile on his face when he says, "You know, I don't think there's anyone on this...
After she woke up, Harry's wife told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for our anniversary. What do you think it means?" "You'll...
If "All the world's a stage, And all the men and women merely players," can we do "Cats"? I wanted see it, but it closed before I got a chance. (Larry Baum in...
Two young men were out in the woods on a camping trip when they came upon a great trout brook. They stayed there all day, enjoying the fishing, which was...
Two beggars panhandle every day at the freeway off ramp. When the commuter rush is over and traffic starts whizzing by, one of them goes around the corner,...
JoLene's Daily-Humor He Said/She Said He said . . .. I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it. She said .. . You wear pants don't...
A man was walking home alone late one night when he hears a ... BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... behind him. Walking faster he looks back, and makes out the image of an...
Due to work commitments I won't be able to post tomorrow, so here's tomorrow's installment in advance ... Conrad I wanna be a bear! A female bear. If you're a...
Thanks Marilyn _______________ Definition of "OLD" First you tell your friends that you are having an affair! Your friend asks you: "Are you having it...
An English explorer was taking part in an expedition to the Himalayas. Led by a grizzled local guide, they ascended one of the less frequently climbed peaks....
Thanks Mary Lou Granny Adams made such beautiful pies! One day I asked her, "How do you get such beautiful pies with the crimps around the edge so even?" ...
Sent: Thursday, October 11, 2007 10:13 PM Subject: s/s "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal..." ... No virus found in this...
I am using the free version of SPAMfighter for private users. It ... No virus found in this incoming message. Checked by AVG Free Edition. Version: 7.5.488 /...
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