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SKILLS TO OVERCOME PROBLEMS IN MARRIAGE...
Part 6 - Seek Solutions

"The first to plead his case seems just, until another comes and
examines him." Proverbs 18:17 (NAS)

When you have a disagreement with your husband, doesn't it feel good
when you win? Especially when you can prove that you're right and
he's wrong? I don't know about you, but I like to be right!! O:-)

As much as it feels good to be right, "being right" cannot become
what it's all about. Your purpose as a couple must be to seek a
solution rather than assessing blame. It really doesn't matter who is
wrong when your ultimate goal is to restore unity between you.

Even when you feel strongly about your side, take time to listen to
your husband's point of view and feelings without interupting, and
try to gain an understanding of why he feels the way he does. Chances
are both of you have some valid points.

Remember that it may be difficult for your cop husband to compromise
sometimes if he is accustomed to having the final say with
his "clientele" on the job. At work, he is the authority. At home, it
may be hard for him to step out of his authoritarian mode and work as
a couple when a disagreement arises. The cop in him sometimes kicks
into gear even at home!

You can wisely help him to move toward compromise/solution mode when
you acknowledge that he has valid points. He needs to know that you
value his thoughts and care how he feels about the situation. When he
sees that you validate his viewpoint, you can suggest that you work
together to find a solution that both of you can live with.

Remember, neither of your egos should be the priority in
disagreements! Always work toward a solution!

PRAYER: Father, give these women your wisdom in dealing with their
husbands when there is a disagreement between them. Reveal to them
what is in their husband's heart and help them to compromise to find
a place of unity. In Jesus' name, amen.
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